Fankle, Continued...

(This is my second post in My Fankle Journey.)

I'm back! I've been through quite a lot during the past few weeks, and I'm finally ready to begin blogging again. So let's dig in! :)

If you've read my blog post, "My Pioneer Trek Sacrament Meeting Talk," you've been introduced to Fankle. If you haven't read my aforementioned blog post, let me catch you up to speed: in early June, 2016, I sprained my ankle very badly while longboarding. I endured quite a lot during my recovery, but it turns out, my new friend, Fankle, decided she can't live without me and has extended her stay! So sad face! :'(

So. Six weeks and two days after I sprained my ankle in the Zermatt parking lot in Midway, Utah, I went to my yearly physical checkup. While going over everything, I asked my doctor about my ankle that was still swollen and painful. He looked at it and said, "Well, I'm not an ankle specialist, so I can't say for sure, but if it's been that long, I would definitely go get it checked out by a podiatrist. I highly recommend Dr. _____ in our building, he's well qualified and a very good doctor."

After my checkup was finished, I walked downstairs and asked the receptionist if Dr. _____ had any appointments that day? I told her, "It's not urgent, I just know all doctors have cancellations, so I wondered if he's available?" She went back to his office, checked with him, and told me to come back at 1:30 p.m.

During my appointment, my podiatrist pushed, pulled, and twisted my sweaty foot. I apologized for my sweatiness and explained that my hands and feet sweat when I'm nervous. He didn't even blink an eye and said it was perfectly fine. (After searching Google images about my condition, I see that my sweaty feet are probably the least of my podiatrist's worries! Ha ha.) My podiatrist asked me many questions, after which he said I should have definitely already recovered after six weeks, so he had me do an x-ray. I knew my ankle wasn't broken, but went ahead with the x-ray since I wanted an answer to what was causing my pain.

The x-ray revealed nothing was broken—yay! But my podiatrist said there was a shadow on one of my ankle bones, which he thought was probably a bone bruise. Thus, he said I needed an MRI to confirm. I was bummed at the news of having to have such an expensive procedure done, but I agreed because if a board-certified podiatrist with an excellent reputation couldn't figure out my ankle's problem with the exam and x-rays he did, I knew something was going on.

The nurse scheduled my MRI, but mildly freaked me out with the safety-precaution questions she asked. While I don't have any severe allergies, I am allergic to sulfa antibiotics—which is why her questions made me nervous. I didn't want to go into anaphylaxis (is that the correct term?) in the MRI machine! Yet I later realized I would be just fine because I wasn't having any dye for my procedure. Whew! :)

Unfortunately, I had to wait an entire week before getting my MRI done. During that time, I kept hoping my Fankle would diminish, but "she" proudly stuck around.

For some reason, I had some anxiety about the MRI, which is weird for me. Usually, I'm so easy-going with medical procedures, but this one seemed really big to me. To combat my nervousness, I researched and read everything I could find about MRIs. As I rationally thought about what my MRI experience would be like, I knew I would be just fine.

But deep down inside, I knew Fankle was not fine. I knew something was really wrong with my ankle. I knew it the second I jumped backward off the longboard! Yet after all my ankle research and doctors' exams, I was still hoping and praying for a miracle. I knew they were just as stumped as I was, so I thought, "Hey, maybe it was just a really bad sprain, exacerbated by the fact that I trekked 23 miles through Wyoming on week three of my recovery! Maybe I just need an extra few weeks to heal!"

As a side note, my podiatrist said my pioneer trek most definitely did not help my ankle's condition! Yeah, I thought not—but I'd do my pioneer trek again in a heartbeat! It was absolutely worth every single minute of every sacrifice I made! :)

The morning of my MRI, I felt like I was going to court. Not that I've ever been to any sort of legal preceding, I just imagined that's what it would feel like: complete nervousness at the verdict that could change my entire life!

I was told to hold very still during the MRI. And because I wanted my MRI results to be perfect—so that I wouldn't have to have another one, but also so they could finally get my diagnosis correct—I held completely and perfectly still! I didn't budge even one millimeter! Yay me! That said, it was a l.o.n.g. 25 minutes. I'm grateful they made me as comfortable as they could and that I had music to listen to. I'll forever remember the awesome happy songs that helped me make it through: "Can't Stop the Feeling" by Justin Timberlake; and "Ride" by twenty one pilots!

Now, I must share this happiness (below)! But first, a couple of items:
1.) I love that Justin Timberlake is wearing all white. I love wearing all white! It's like, my thing! I probably love it so much because when I wear all white, I don't look quite so pale! Ha ha. In fact, I hope my next dress purchase will be a new white dress for church!
2.) Prior to Fankle, I could have totally danced in this video! Sadly, thanks to Fankle extending her stay, I'll just have to be happy with watching Galen, Justin and Lev—they're my favorite dancers in this video!



And while I'm at it, I'll share this catchy song too—even though it's not put together as well as Mr. Timberlake's. That said, I love their beat and style of music! This gem makes me want to dance and kickbox and sing all at once! Ha ha. Yes, you read that right. I kickbox, too. :)


After my MRI, I felt such freedom and accomplishment! You laugh, but I was really nervous about it! I even prayed for my angels to be with me that day. :) Thus, I just had to document the fact that I made it through(!), then I happily headed home.

I had nearly four days of waiting for my MRI-results appointment and spent that time with my wonderful family and extended family.

The Sunday before my Monday appointment, I was released from my calling as first counselor in my ward's Young Women presidency. While I will dearly miss all of "my" young women and the sweet leaders I served with, I will not miss all of the time it takes to help run an organization of such great importance. I honestly think serving in the YW presidency is like the equivalent of having a part-time job! Including my time as Young Women President while living in Texas, I've been in the amazing YW organization for nearly four and a half years! Yes, I'm ecstatic to have more time to spend with my precious family!!

I had butterflies while getting ready for my MRI followup appointment. When I was almost ready to go, Greg suddenly asked, "Can I go to your doctor appointment with you?" Surprised, I said, "Sure." I was only surprised because Greg was certain my results would tell me I was fine. He was sure we'd have a good laugh over Fankle one day! I, on the other hand, never wavered in my feelings that something was wrong. And, oh boy! would I have loved to have been proven wrong in this situation! Unfortunately, I was entirely too right!

We didn't have to wait at all for my podiatrist's nurse to come bring us back to the exam room. Just thinking about that experience gives me butterflies to this day! Dr. _____ came in with my MRI report, sat down and said (something like), "Okay, the results are in. You have two bone bruises—one in each bone [the tibia and fibula]; a partially-torn ligament on the outside-front of your ankle; and a torn tendon on the inside of your ankle." He then went on to explain what it all meant.

Apparently, bone bruises are just one step away from a fracture! I had no idea of the seriousness of bone bruises, but they are a big deal. I finally understood why my ankle/foot/calf were so greatly bruised—the bleeding actually came from my bone bruises! My bone bruises will heal with immobilization. My partially-torn ligament isn't too big of a deal, but it still needs time to heal and immobilization is the answer for that problem as well. But the tendon tear is where my biggest problem is...

My podiatrist explained that my posterior tibial tendon (or tibialis posterior tendon) had a linear/longitudinal tear in it, and without surgery, it won't heal properly—or possibly not at all. He said that too much time had passed since the date of my injury, and the chances of the tendon growing back together properly on its own are slim-to-none. He also said that I could just be put in a boot for eight weeks—to see if it would heal on its own, but that I would be really disappointed if it didn't heal and I had to have surgery anyway—and then I'd still be in a boot for an additional eight weeks after that!

As I listened to that kind man, I was in denial! I didn't want to believe that I was going to have surgery for the first time in my life! I mean, I've had plenty of stitches (or sutures, as surgeons call them) before, but those were nothing like actual life-changing surgery!!

Wanting to blame someone or something for my predicament, I asked my podiatrist if the first urgent care clinic had misdiagnosed me? He said, "No, there's no way they could have known what truly happened to your ankle without doing an MRI."—which is not the standard protocol after just being injured. X-rays and exams are the norm, especially when my foot felt like all its tendons and ligaments were intact—which is exactly what every doctor thought when they examined me. And after all of that, they would have told me to wait four to six weeks to heal, anyway!

Also, because my tendon tear is right down the middle (like when you pull apart string cheese, length-wise), no doctor would have been able to tell that my tendon isn't working properly because it was still fully attached and working properly—it just happened to have a tear in the middle of it.

As I've thought about it further, I realized that even if I had visited another doctor before I went on our stake's pioneer trek (during week three of my sprain), they probably would have said the same thing: it's not broken; it's just a bad sprain; wait until six weeks have passed—if it's not better by then, come back.

I wasn't trying to be rude to Greg because I dearly wanted him to be right with my whole heart and soul (that nothing was wrong with my ankle), but I totally said, "See?! I knew I was right! I knew there was something seriously wrong with Fankle!" He looked quite bummed-out. I felt even worse. :'(

We scheduled my surgery for that very Wednesday—just two days away, and listened intently to everything my podiatrist told us. We headed out the door and my mind was racing with everything I needed to get done at home so I could be ready for my surgery.

Before we continue, I'd like to say this:

For two months before my fateful "you need surgery" podiatrist appointment, I spent hours upon hours researching everything I could get my hands on about ankle sprains, ankle anatomy, and ankle recovery. Even though I knew about bone bruises, I didn't completely understand just how serious they are. I thought for sure my problem was just with my ankle's ligaments, fascia and retinaculums. Thus, the second my podiatrist began telling me what was wrong with my tendon, I knew right away that it was nothing to mess with.

Because of all the research I had done, I knew that surgery was my only option for a successful ankle rehabilitation. I desperately wanted to regain full function in my ankle and I wasn't about to mess that up just because surgery is nerve-wracking! I knew that surgery was exactly what I was supposed to do.

I say all of that because I was asked by family members if I was really sure that surgery was the best option, or if I had gotten a second opinion? I assured them I made the right choice. *Not to mention, my podiatrist has been a practicing doctor/surgeon for 21 years. I've read his credentials, and he's one of the best! I even compared podiatrists to orthopedists for my specific condition, and felt extremely confident that, for me, I made the right choice in picking my podiatrist.

It feels good when you know you've made the right choice, doesn't it?! :)

Everything after my MRI followup appointment over the next two days are a blur, but I remember being super tired from working so hard to get everything ready. The one thing I do remember from this time in my life is the dream I had. I'm fuzzy on when it actually happened, but I know it happened before my ankle surgery:

I dreamt I was in this amazingly beautiful and huge building. I think it was like a fancy hotel or someone's gorgeous and enormous home. While there, I began running extremely fast. My hair was flying out behind me! And I wasn't even sweaty! Ha ha. Suddenly, I began endlessly leaping, and jumping, and turning! I was limitless and completely perfect in my technique! My body did everything exactly as I desired! I was this amazingly fast, complicated and beautiful dancer! My awesome dream lasted quite a long time, and I continued dancing like that until I awoke.

I was really sad once I remembered that Fankle was hindering me from dancing like that in real life. Yet over the past 11 days, I've relied on my stunning dream more than once to help get me through my ankle-surgery struggle. As I think about my dream now, I believe it was a gift from Heaven! I believe Heavenly Father knew I needed to have a break from reality, and that vivid dream was exactly what would get me through. :)

As you can see, I'm not done writing my Fankle story—not even close! With this post, I'm only finishing act one! Ha ha. But right now, I need to go get ready for bed, and it takes me quite a while in my current differently-abled state. Just know that more Fankle updates will be coming, and I can't wait to write it all!

The next post in My Fankle Journey is "Fanklestein."

Higher Education: Yes or No?

Before I get into my blog post, I must share this fabulous video I found on Vimeo the other night. I highly recommend watching it because not only is it good, but also because I'll be discussing some of its points in my post. :)

(Success in the New Economy from Brian Y. Marsh on Vimeo.)

Wasn't that great?! While I understand this video was produced by a career technical college, and I'm certain they're trying to increase their enrollment numbers, it makes some really valid points about our economy.

My experience with one point in the video is this: my husband has two bachelor's degrees and an MBA, but he didn't receive a raise after he graduated with his MBA. Also, Greg received his initial offer of employment from his current company based on his two bachelor's degrees and the years of experience in his previous jobs—meaning, he didn't need an MBA to land his present job.

But back to my husband's non-raise... When Greg received his year-end review the year he graduated, I thought for sure his MBA degree would automatically translate into a heftier paycheck. I thought a raise was a no-brainer because Greg was an even greater asset to his company. Sadly, I was super disappointed when he didn't receive anything(!) for his MBA degree other than a very heartfelt "Congratulations!" from his boss. (I appreciate his sincere support of my husband!) I was also disappointed because we had (and continue to have) a significant student loan payment due monthly, with no way to increase our income other than Greg finding a better paying job or having me go back to work—neither of which will happen until our children are grown.

So. Here is my husband with all of this great knowledge and a nice "car payment"—except we don't have a new car to show for our monthly debt! It's a frustrating and budget-wearying situation we find ourselves in. This is where having me teach piano lessons comes in handy. Even though I'm only teaching three-and-a-half hours per week, the money I bring in is very helpful for our family. I'm truly grateful for that benefit!

The irony of this story is that my husband recently began online distance education classes with Harvard University's Harvard Extension School! Please don't choke on your chocolate milk! Ha ha. Don't get me wrong because I'm extremely pleased with Greg's choice. I'm very excited about the fact that I married a Harvard man! Ha ha. Just kidding. I'm eternally happy in my decision to marry Greg with or without his many university degrees/certificates! For a good chuckle, please read The Harvard Crimson's article, "Marry Me? Show Me Your Resume."

If all goes well, Greg will receive a Professional Graduate Certificate from Harvard in Organizational Behavior, in 2017. Yay! It's not a traditional bachelor's degree or an MBA (because he already has both), but it's one of their programs meant for business professionals, and I say it totally counts! We also hope he'll receive some reimbursement from his company for good grades—especially since his company sponsors the program for their employees and that's how Greg found out about Harvard's programs in the first place.

*Side note: Greg had to provide documentation of his MBA, i.e., transcripts, in order for his company to enroll him in Harvard's Organizational Behavior program. It's nice knowing Greg has been vetted and found worthy to join Harvard's illustrious ranks!

It's been fascinating to watch Greg do schoolwork again, in addition to his full-time job and his part-time church service as our ward's executive secretary. Greg performs his "juggling act" very well. He works hard to keep every "ball" moving at the precise moment and in the proper direction. It's like we've gone back in time to our life in Colorado (circa 2004–2008) because he was doing the same lineup as previously mentioned—except that he was enrolled at the University of Nebraska, not Harvard! Greg's work, school, and church responsibilities are each time consuming in their own right. He is busy! I'd forgotten how much responsibility rests on me when he's enrolled in a university. It makes me tired just thinking about it! Ha ha.

All of that said (the "Success in the New Economy" video and our experiences with Greg's university degrees), I wouldn't change what we're doing. I love that my husband has such incredible depth and breadth of knowledge! I love knowing that if Greg were ever laid off again, he has the credentials to apply for nearly any job he wants in the business world. I have such a feeling of security that I'm not sure would exist without Greg's university degrees and the vast knowledge he's gained from them. And believe me, I understand that everything my little family has can disappear in a flash because we've been there, done that, before. I'm not deluded in any way! Thus, I appreciate what we do have so very much! :)

The other benefit Greg has gained from his broad education is the fact that he can blend into virtually any environment. He is capable of reading others to a degree that I cannot—which I believe is a direct result of his education and employment experiences. His educational and employment history has prepared him to handle literally any scenario that comes his way. Greg's ability to finish so many university-level classes (with excellent grades to boot!) proves that he has amazing dedication and follow-through. He can successfully complete whatever assignment he's given.

Based on Greg's and my experiences with multiple universities, and the information presented in the video above, I believe it's vital to really figure out who we are. We must understand our strengths, weaknesses, talents and abilities, and proceed with our lives accordingly. In the process of those wonderful—and sometimes hard—moments of self-discovery and true understanding, we shouldn't let others' choices or opinions affect our lives in negative ways. We must look for the best in each other and ourselves!

I'm going to spend some quality time pondering what educational path I'll take when my three children are raised. I've pondered before, but I keep bouncing back and forth between medicine, education and psychology because I love them all! It's been very hard for me to decide what my career choice should be when my nest is empty, but I know there is definitely something I am supposed to do on this earth, so I really want to figure it out. Of course, I know my most important priority is raising my children, and I will focus on my babies until they have moved out of our house. :)

My patriarchal blessing talks about my future career quite a bit, and I believe its words because I have faith that it is truly inspired from our Heavenly Father—I will seek out its "advice" as well. Plus, it's pretty hard to debate my patriarchal blessing when it has never been wrong in the 24 years since I received it! Yeah, that's an astounding track record!

Thus, when the question is asked whether individuals should seek out higher education or not, I say absolutely yes!!! I think everyone should extend their education as far and wide as they possibly can. *I fully understand student loans are inevitable for the majority of students, but I say those costs are worth every penny! Well, provided the institutions aren't overpriced and they're not trying to swindle everyone! By the by, no college, university, financial institution or government entity is paying me to endorse higher education. It's all me! Ha ha.

Even though I know it's not realistic, I dearly wish everyone could attend the college, university, or technical school of their choosing. I honestly believe higher education makes us much better people. Yes, a well-educated society is worth everything!

P.S. I can't wait for the day I graduate from college, or a university, and receive that lovely (and expensive) diploma!! Until then, this fun Harvard t-shirt my husband bought for me will have to suffice! ;)

What "Be Prepared" Means to Me

Please note that I actually wrote this blog post yesterday (Wednesday, April 15th), but I didn't have time to publish it because I was creating my typographic designs to go with it. :)

This morning began like every other morning: wake up at 7:00; wake up my uber-tired junior-high-aged children; take my thyroid pill with a huge glass of water; change into my favorite yellow and grey comfy-cozies; make my children's gluten-free lunches; drive my beautiful daughter and handsome son to school; breathe deeply as I drive home (I strongly dislike others' lame driving skills!); wake up my youngest sleeping child and tell him the weather report—so he can choose what to wear; eat a breakfast of champions (Frosted Mini-Wheats...my absolute favorite!); sit by my adorable baby boy on the couch for a few minutes while he watches NetFlix; check Instagram while my darling boy brushes his teeth; tell my sweet son it's time to leave for school; ask my Gregor if he's coming with us; drive to school; drive home, go inside, wish I could go back to sleep; put in my contacts; do my oral-cleansing routine; make Greg's and my bed look puffy and peaceful; call my sweet mama and talk on the phone with while I do dishes; hang up the phone; remove the yummy clothes from the dryer (Clean laundry is one of my most favorite smells ever!); switch the wet laundry from the washer to the dryer; watch a few minutes of a fascinating "House" episode (I absolutely l.o.v.e. that show! I would be completely thrilled to meet Hugh Laurie one day. I also love the fact that Mr. Laurie is still married to his original/first/only wife—and they have three children!)...

That's when things became not like every other morning: our home phone rang.

As I walked over to answer the phone, I thought about how I was surprised the phone rang because we don't usually get many phone calls during the day, and I had already talked with my mom. It was Greg's dad calling, so I gave the phone to Greg (he worked from home today). Greg and his dad don't talk on the phone too often, but they have a great relationship so I wasn't surprised he called.

Sadly, it wasn't the kind of phone conversation anyone wants to receive. Greg's dad said his (Greg's) Aunt Carol died suddenly from a heart attack this morning around 7:00. Even as I write that, I can't believe it's really true. Aunt Carol was the baby sister of Greg's amazing mom. Both of these wonderful, sweet, kind, funny and feisty women died entirely too soon. None of our family members were ready to see them go! I wish we would have been able to keep Anne and Carol until they were in their nineties! Sadly, I don't always get what I wish...

I found it highly interesting that just last week, I had a dream about Greg's darling mom. In my dream, Greg and I walked into a room filled with his immediate and (a few) extended family members. Some of them were casually sitting on a queen-sized white bed, and some of them were standing around. Everyone was casually chatting in smallish groups, but also together as a whole group. I looked directly at Anne and very surprisingly said, "Oh my goodness, HI!!! Can everybody see you?! Or, is it just me?!"—you know, because Anne is no longer with us. Anne smiled with her familiar twinkle and cheerfully said, "Yes, they can all see me too!"

In my dream, I realized what a special treat it was for us to be able to see Anne and spend time with her again. After Anne's and my initial conversation, everybody settled in, happily talking with each other. It was so awesome to just be in Anne's presence. Her entertaining personality was—as always—larger than life! Anne was just so delightful and fun to be with. In my dream we all joyfully conversed for a long time, but then I woke up. :(

Even though I was sad I saw Anne only in a dream, I felt so peaceful and happy! I knew this wasn't an ordinary dream. I knew it was a dream of comfort not only for me, but it was also meant for Greg and his family. The only problem was, I felt a little silly sharing my dream with his entire family because I wasn't sure what they would think. So, I only shared it with Greg and his sister when she "randomly" called me last Friday to chat for a few minutes. Remember though, there are no coincidences!

So this morning as I thought back to the happy dream I had less than a week ago, I realized that my Anne dream was helping prepare me for a sad today. Even though we are heartbroken to have to say goodbye to our lovely Aunt Carol—who also happens to remind us of Greg's splendid mother, Anne, we absolutely know that both of their spirits live on!

The only two positives I can think about today's news are: 1) Aunt Carol has been reunited with her beautiful sister, whom she dearly missed; and 2) Anne and Carol are with our Heavenly Father, and our Savior, Jesus Christ—and the rest of humankind who have departed this earthly life. Here is one of my favorite scriptures that mirrors my thoughts—it gives me little tears every time I read it!

"...[T]he spirits of all men [and women], as soon as they are departed from this mortal body...whether they be good or evil, are taken home to that God who gave them life." – Alma 40:11

No, dear readers, my happy Anne dream was not meant just for me. It was a beautiful reminder that even though our lives are relatively short in the grand scheme of things, we are not left here all alone. Let me repeat: we are most definitely not alone in our lives! No matter our circumstances, we have sweet, heavenly angels watching over each one of us, reaching out to us when we need them!

After thinking about this morning's life-changing events, I called my mom again. We chatted for a few minutes before she needed to attend to my nephew. I hung up and had a good cry about Aunt Carol. When I finished crying, I called my dad. We had a nice conversation that went on for quite a while. I made sure both my parents know how much I love them, and how grateful I am that they are still living healthily and doing so well. Life is such a gift! :)

Throughout today I've had recurring thoughts about being prepared. I've decided to expound on what "Be Prepared" means to me.

Being prepared usually implies we should have many physical objects that will enable us to continue living in the event of an emergency or a catastrophe. We talk of food storage, water, flashlights, soap, gas, generators, 72-hour kits, bedding, first-aid kits, clothing, shoes, medication, oral care, visual aids (i.e., contacts and glasses—not technology, ha ha.), sunscreen, health/life/homeowners/renters/auto insurance, etc. If we're talking about outdoor adventures, the be prepared list grows significantly.

I fully agree it's important to work on gaining emergency supplies for the benefit of our families and friends, but I see the most vital element in being prepared in terms of relationships, for they—and our memories and knowledge—are truly the only things we take with us when we depart this earthy life.

Yes, even though we don't know when the moment will come, we must daily prepare to meet our maker. Every one of us must carefully evaluate right now to see if we are doing what it takes to have confidence when meeting God, our Heavenly Father, and His Son, Jesus Christ. We'll never know exactly when we'll be chosen to go to the other side, but just like so many of our family members, friends and acquaintances have done in the past, it will happen eventually. I can think of nothing more wonderful and worrisome than meeting our Heavenly Father, and Savior, so I hope we're ready for that amazing moment!

I think one of the most important ways to be prepared is by having a clear conscience in regard to our family relationships. We must never let a day go by without saying, "I love you!" to each other. We don't need to throw out a continuous barrage of "I love you...I love you...I love you!" all day long (reminiscent of Don Lockwood fake professing his love to Lina Lamont in Singin' in the Rain—one of my favorite movies ever!), for that would become tedious and the recipient might doubt our sincerity! Yet it is very possible through our actions, words, and deeds, to show our dear family members every day just how much they mean to us...how special they are to us!

Of course I understand that not every family relationship is a perfectly beautiful walk around Secret Lake, but it is possible and essential to never let our family members wonder of our love for them. :)

I loved finding these cute flowers to represent the "He/she loves me; she/he loves me not" idea. :)

Similarly, if we have family relationships that aren't so rosy, it's vital for us to find a way to put the past behind us, make amends, and move on. Forgiveness is a must in every family relationship! I know sometimes it might be hard to want to forgive our family members, yet that's when we need to pray for help—like we are going to meet our maker tomorrow. We must pray to have the desire to forgive those who have hurt us. I'm not implying we should ever allow ourselves to be put in harm's way, but I am saying we need to completely forgive, while simultaneously staying safe.

Once we have made every family relationship right, it's time to work on our other friendships or acquaintance relationships. When the time comes and we find ourselves in heaven, we should be ready to meet anyone we know—without a cloud of disappointment or regret overshadowing our reunions.

When those heavenly meet and greets come for me, I dearly want to have a crystal clear conscience. I know I won't ever be perfect here in this earth life, but I never want to bump into someone in heaven whom I haven't forgiven here on Earth. Obviously it's up to them if they choose to forgive me, but I'll at least try to ask for their forgiveness. That said, I know I have some work to do...it might take me a while to get there, but please know that I'll be actively working on my forgiveness skillz! :)

I'm filled with gratitude in the fact that my relationships with my departed family members were in excellent standing before their dear souls were taken home to heaven. Even though I miss them terribly, I have such peace knowing we're all good!

Even though I try really hard to consciously live my life in the moment, every moment, days like today help me re-internalize just how temporary and priceless our lives are! We'll never know how much time we have to enjoy with those most important souls we adore. I hope each and every one of us makes the very best use of each invaluable moment we are given!

P.S. Off to P90X I go—it's KenpoX day! *Because of our sweet Aunt Carol's sudden tragedy, I've decided I will never, ever, stop exercising until the day I die. Of course I won't exercise completely continuously—for that would be unhealthy for me to never rest, but I will definitely exercise enough that my body remains as healthy and strong for as long as possible! P90X Foreva'! Ha ha.