Fankle, Continued...

(This is my second post in My Fankle Journey.)

I'm back! I've been through quite a lot during the past few weeks, and I'm finally ready to begin blogging again. So let's dig in! :)

If you've read my blog post, "My Pioneer Trek Sacrament Meeting Talk," you've been introduced to Fankle. If you haven't read my aforementioned blog post, let me catch you up to speed: in early June, 2016, I sprained my ankle very badly while longboarding. I endured quite a lot during my recovery, but it turns out, my new friend, Fankle, decided she can't live without me and has extended her stay! So sad face! :'(

So. Six weeks and two days after I sprained my ankle in the Zermatt parking lot in Midway, Utah, I went to my yearly physical checkup. While going over everything, I asked my doctor about my ankle that was still swollen and painful. He looked at it and said, "Well, I'm not an ankle specialist, so I can't say for sure, but if it's been that long, I would definitely go get it checked out by a podiatrist. I highly recommend Dr. _____ in our building, he's well qualified and a very good doctor."

After my checkup was finished, I walked downstairs and asked the receptionist if Dr. _____ had any appointments that day? I told her, "It's not urgent, I just know all doctors have cancellations, so I wondered if he's available?" She went back to his office, checked with him, and told me to come back at 1:30 p.m.

During my appointment, my podiatrist pushed, pulled, and twisted my sweaty foot. I apologized for my sweatiness and explained that my hands and feet sweat when I'm nervous. He didn't even blink an eye and said it was perfectly fine. (After searching Google images about my condition, I see that my sweaty feet are probably the least of my podiatrist's worries! Ha ha.) My podiatrist asked me many questions, after which he said I should have definitely already recovered after six weeks, so he had me do an x-ray. I knew my ankle wasn't broken, but went ahead with the x-ray since I wanted an answer to what was causing my pain.

The x-ray revealed nothing was broken—yay! But my podiatrist said there was a shadow on one of my ankle bones, which he thought was probably a bone bruise. Thus, he said I needed an MRI to confirm. I was bummed at the news of having to have such an expensive procedure done, but I agreed because if a board-certified podiatrist with an excellent reputation couldn't figure out my ankle's problem with the exam and x-rays he did, I knew something was going on.

The nurse scheduled my MRI, but mildly freaked me out with the safety-precaution questions she asked. While I don't have any severe allergies, I am allergic to sulfa antibiotics—which is why her questions made me nervous. I didn't want to go into anaphylaxis (is that the correct term?) in the MRI machine! Yet I later realized I would be just fine because I wasn't having any dye for my procedure. Whew! :)

Unfortunately, I had to wait an entire week before getting my MRI done. During that time, I kept hoping my Fankle would diminish, but "she" proudly stuck around.

For some reason, I had some anxiety about the MRI, which is weird for me. Usually, I'm so easy-going with medical procedures, but this one seemed really big to me. To combat my nervousness, I researched and read everything I could find about MRIs. As I rationally thought about what my MRI experience would be like, I knew I would be just fine.

But deep down inside, I knew Fankle was not fine. I knew something was really wrong with my ankle. I knew it the second I jumped backward off the longboard! Yet after all my ankle research and doctors' exams, I was still hoping and praying for a miracle. I knew they were just as stumped as I was, so I thought, "Hey, maybe it was just a really bad sprain, exacerbated by the fact that I trekked 23 miles through Wyoming on week three of my recovery! Maybe I just need an extra few weeks to heal!"

As a side note, my podiatrist said my pioneer trek most definitely did not help my ankle's condition! Yeah, I thought not—but I'd do my pioneer trek again in a heartbeat! It was absolutely worth every single minute of every sacrifice I made! :)

The morning of my MRI, I felt like I was going to court. Not that I've ever been to any sort of legal preceding, I just imagined that's what it would feel like: complete nervousness at the verdict that could change my entire life!

I was told to hold very still during the MRI. And because I wanted my MRI results to be perfect—so that I wouldn't have to have another one, but also so they could finally get my diagnosis correct—I held completely and perfectly still! I didn't budge even one millimeter! Yay me! That said, it was a l.o.n.g. 25 minutes. I'm grateful they made me as comfortable as they could and that I had music to listen to. I'll forever remember the awesome happy songs that helped me make it through: "Can't Stop the Feeling" by Justin Timberlake; and "Ride" by twenty one pilots!

Now, I must share this happiness (below)! But first, a couple of items:
1.) I love that Justin Timberlake is wearing all white. I love wearing all white! It's like, my thing! I probably love it so much because when I wear all white, I don't look quite so pale! Ha ha. In fact, I hope my next dress purchase will be a new white dress for church!
2.) Prior to Fankle, I could have totally danced in this video! Sadly, thanks to Fankle extending her stay, I'll just have to be happy with watching Galen, Justin and Lev—they're my favorite dancers in this video!



And while I'm at it, I'll share this catchy song too—even though it's not put together as well as Mr. Timberlake's. That said, I love their beat and style of music! This gem makes me want to dance and kickbox and sing all at once! Ha ha. Yes, you read that right. I kickbox, too. :)


After my MRI, I felt such freedom and accomplishment! You laugh, but I was really nervous about it! I even prayed for my angels to be with me that day. :) Thus, I just had to document the fact that I made it through(!), then I happily headed home.

I had nearly four days of waiting for my MRI-results appointment and spent that time with my wonderful family and extended family.

The Sunday before my Monday appointment, I was released from my calling as first counselor in my ward's Young Women presidency. While I will dearly miss all of "my" young women and the sweet leaders I served with, I will not miss all of the time it takes to help run an organization of such great importance. I honestly think serving in the YW presidency is like the equivalent of having a part-time job! Including my time as Young Women President while living in Texas, I've been in the amazing YW organization for nearly four and a half years! Yes, I'm ecstatic to have more time to spend with my precious family!!

I had butterflies while getting ready for my MRI followup appointment. When I was almost ready to go, Greg suddenly asked, "Can I go to your doctor appointment with you?" Surprised, I said, "Sure." I was only surprised because Greg was certain my results would tell me I was fine. He was sure we'd have a good laugh over Fankle one day! I, on the other hand, never wavered in my feelings that something was wrong. And, oh boy! would I have loved to have been proven wrong in this situation! Unfortunately, I was entirely too right!

We didn't have to wait at all for my podiatrist's nurse to come bring us back to the exam room. Just thinking about that experience gives me butterflies to this day! Dr. _____ came in with my MRI report, sat down and said (something like), "Okay, the results are in. You have two bone bruises—one in each bone [the tibia and fibula]; a partially-torn ligament on the outside-front of your ankle; and a torn tendon on the inside of your ankle." He then went on to explain what it all meant.

Apparently, bone bruises are just one step away from a fracture! I had no idea of the seriousness of bone bruises, but they are a big deal. I finally understood why my ankle/foot/calf were so greatly bruised—the bleeding actually came from my bone bruises! My bone bruises will heal with immobilization. My partially-torn ligament isn't too big of a deal, but it still needs time to heal and immobilization is the answer for that problem as well. But the tendon tear is where my biggest problem is...

My podiatrist explained that my posterior tibial tendon (or tibialis posterior tendon) had a linear/longitudinal tear in it, and without surgery, it won't heal properly—or possibly not at all. He said that too much time had passed since the date of my injury, and the chances of the tendon growing back together properly on its own are slim-to-none. He also said that I could just be put in a boot for eight weeks—to see if it would heal on its own, but that I would be really disappointed if it didn't heal and I had to have surgery anyway—and then I'd still be in a boot for an additional eight weeks after that!

As I listened to that kind man, I was in denial! I didn't want to believe that I was going to have surgery for the first time in my life! I mean, I've had plenty of stitches (or sutures, as surgeons call them) before, but those were nothing like actual life-changing surgery!!

Wanting to blame someone or something for my predicament, I asked my podiatrist if the first urgent care clinic had misdiagnosed me? He said, "No, there's no way they could have known what truly happened to your ankle without doing an MRI."—which is not the standard protocol after just being injured. X-rays and exams are the norm, especially when my foot felt like all its tendons and ligaments were intact—which is exactly what every doctor thought when they examined me. And after all of that, they would have told me to wait four to six weeks to heal, anyway!

Also, because my tendon tear is right down the middle (like when you pull apart string cheese, length-wise), no doctor would have been able to tell that my tendon isn't working properly because it was still fully attached and working properly—it just happened to have a tear in the middle of it.

As I've thought about it further, I realized that even if I had visited another doctor before I went on our stake's pioneer trek (during week three of my sprain), they probably would have said the same thing: it's not broken; it's just a bad sprain; wait until six weeks have passed—if it's not better by then, come back.

I wasn't trying to be rude to Greg because I dearly wanted him to be right with my whole heart and soul (that nothing was wrong with my ankle), but I totally said, "See?! I knew I was right! I knew there was something seriously wrong with Fankle!" He looked quite bummed-out. I felt even worse. :'(

We scheduled my surgery for that very Wednesday—just two days away, and listened intently to everything my podiatrist told us. We headed out the door and my mind was racing with everything I needed to get done at home so I could be ready for my surgery.

Before we continue, I'd like to say this:

For two months before my fateful "you need surgery" podiatrist appointment, I spent hours upon hours researching everything I could get my hands on about ankle sprains, ankle anatomy, and ankle recovery. Even though I knew about bone bruises, I didn't completely understand just how serious they are. I thought for sure my problem was just with my ankle's ligaments, fascia and retinaculums. Thus, the second my podiatrist began telling me what was wrong with my tendon, I knew right away that it was nothing to mess with.

Because of all the research I had done, I knew that surgery was my only option for a successful ankle rehabilitation. I desperately wanted to regain full function in my ankle and I wasn't about to mess that up just because surgery is nerve-wracking! I knew that surgery was exactly what I was supposed to do.

I say all of that because I was asked by family members if I was really sure that surgery was the best option, or if I had gotten a second opinion? I assured them I made the right choice. *Not to mention, my podiatrist has been a practicing doctor/surgeon for 21 years. I've read his credentials, and he's one of the best! I even compared podiatrists to orthopedists for my specific condition, and felt extremely confident that, for me, I made the right choice in picking my podiatrist.

It feels good when you know you've made the right choice, doesn't it?! :)

Everything after my MRI followup appointment over the next two days are a blur, but I remember being super tired from working so hard to get everything ready. The one thing I do remember from this time in my life is the dream I had. I'm fuzzy on when it actually happened, but I know it happened before my ankle surgery:

I dreamt I was in this amazingly beautiful and huge building. I think it was like a fancy hotel or someone's gorgeous and enormous home. While there, I began running extremely fast. My hair was flying out behind me! And I wasn't even sweaty! Ha ha. Suddenly, I began endlessly leaping, and jumping, and turning! I was limitless and completely perfect in my technique! My body did everything exactly as I desired! I was this amazingly fast, complicated and beautiful dancer! My awesome dream lasted quite a long time, and I continued dancing like that until I awoke.

I was really sad once I remembered that Fankle was hindering me from dancing like that in real life. Yet over the past 11 days, I've relied on my stunning dream more than once to help get me through my ankle-surgery struggle. As I think about my dream now, I believe it was a gift from Heaven! I believe Heavenly Father knew I needed to have a break from reality, and that vivid dream was exactly what would get me through. :)

As you can see, I'm not done writing my Fankle story—not even close! With this post, I'm only finishing act one! Ha ha. But right now, I need to go get ready for bed, and it takes me quite a while in my current differently-abled state. Just know that more Fankle updates will be coming, and I can't wait to write it all!

The next post in My Fankle Journey is "Fanklestein."

Exercise Prosperity: P90X and INSANITY Workout Schedule

Hello! Today I'm sharing how I've combined the P90X and INSANITY workout programs. This is my fifth post in my Exercise Prosperity series. As I've said previously, no one has asked me to write this, nor am I being compensated in any way for my words—I simply love sharing what makes me happy and healthy!

Last year, after I finished trying out my new Insanity videos, I was ready to combine them with P90X. I sat down on my exercise mat and spread out my P90X and Insanity DVDs. Previously, I put them in their own separate cases because I didn't like the cardboard flip DVD cases they came in—they seemed to scratch them. I used a big box of blank/empty DVD cases that I bought at Sam's Club years ago. I wrote the DVD titles on large note cards as cutely/nicely as I could and slid them in the front of the cases.

After thinking deeply about each P90X and Insanity video, I decided what category they fell into, and alternated the two programs' videos. I spent about 45 minutes arranging and rearranging my videos according to which body areas each video focused on. I really wanted my body to be exercised well, but not the same areas on subsequent days. I knew my tired body parts would need a rest the next day and wanted to focus on other areas that weren't sore. After I was satisfied with my arrangement, I wrote down my workout schedule on notebook paper and put the videos on our bookshelf next to the TV.

I went through my initial P90X/Insanity schedule twice. My third time through, I decided to take notes on how I felt after doing each video because I felt there were some tweaks in my combinations that needed to be made—and I was right! After my third session, I spent another 25 minutes on my happy exercise mat rearranging my DVDs and felt really good about my changes. Yet after my fourth run-through, I realized there was one more modification that needed to be made to my schedule. Thus, I'm very happy to say that I'm finally satisfied with that fourth arrangement, and I'm on my third time through it! :)

By the by, I've combined the P90X and Insanity videos differently than any of the other hybrid schedules out there. From what I quickly researched online, no one else has combined P90X and Insanity like this before—I'm such an innovator! Ha ha. Sorry if it seems like I'm bragging because I'm not. I'm just thrilled that I've worked hard enough and long enough to have something significant to contribute to our fitness world! :)

When I first began using P90X and Insanity together, I was still only doing the videos three times per week. Yet one night when I was on Instagram (October 23rd, 2015), I saw a post by one of my favorite exercise gurus, Michael Vazquez. He said,

"If you have any questions about fitness I love to open a q&a right now and help answer any!! Ask away don't be shy. 👊🏾💥 #PerformixDriven"

I enthusiastically typed to Mr. Vazquez, "How many days per week of exercising do you recommend? Do you alternate strength and cardio or do both every day? Also, even though I exercise consistently, my "mommy tummy" seems to want to stay put no matter what exercises I try. It has definitely diminished (yay!), but I'd love to get it more toned—what do you recommend?"

I honestly didn't expect a response from such a famous Instagrammer, but here's what Mr. Vazquez replied,

"@enthusiasticfantastic no less than 4 days a week. I personally do it all in one day of training I'll start with lifting/strength training and end it with explosive circuits or body weight training. Everyone is different. This works for me."

Yeah, I was beside myself that a man with 337,000 Instagram followers actually replied to me! :) But again, that's what makes me continue following him on Instagram. Yes, he makes his living and supports his family off of his Instagram sponsors—so his followers matter in that regard, but I truly believe he does what he does for the sheer love of it and because he genuinely wants to help others become their best selves.

I replied back, "Thank you so much for your advice @michaelcvazquez! I've been exercising three days per week, so I'm going to commit to four days and work it into my schedule! #hereigo! :)"

Yes, after that Instagram encounter, I was absolutely committed to exercising four days per week—there was no going back. I even used the cute little purple sneaker icon for each of my exercising calendar items on my smart phone so I wouldn't forget or let something else get in my way! :)

I did a great job of exercising to my P90X/Insanity lineup for four days per week, for about two months. Yet in late December, 2015, I decided I wanted to do even better and committed to exercising five days per week! You see, I wanted to be completely physically prepared for my ward's (church) Young Women winter camp—where I learned how to snowboard!!! Let me tell you, that was a tough schedule bump up.

I did really great at the beginning of my new effort, but then I struggled for a couple of weeks to keep up my five-days-per-week streak because I felt like I simply didn't have enough time to do everything that needed to be done. Oh, how I wished for just three more hours per day! But after really and fully internalizing that working out five days per week is absolutely what I want and need in my life, my quest became easier and it hasn't been an issue since. Yay!

Call me crazy, but recently, I've even been feeling that I'd like to workout six days per week simply because I feel SO GOOD on the days I exercise! There's a notable difference in my mood and productivity when I exercise vs. when I don't. :)

Last night, I read this article on Medium, "Exercise Habits of Ultra-Successful People," by Andrew Merle. It definitely made me further ponder my exercise six days per week idea—in a positive way. While I can't guarantee that I'll be able to keep up with my "exercise six days per week" goal—because I have three precious children and a wonderful husband who legitimately need me (and all that goes into running a household); plus I have a very time-demanding calling in my church; and I teach piano lessons every week—I'm going to try my darnedest! Even if I slip back to exercising five days per week once in a while, I'll still feel good about my efforts—anything on top of that is just gravy! :)

*Interesting side note: my husband's current Harvard instructor (female) used to play pickup basketball with President Obama when they were both enrolled at Harvard! (See the photo on the exercise article listed above—obviously, it's a different person playing with Obama.) Wow, it really is such a small world! Yes, I refer to that connection as the "Two Degrees of Greg Peterson"—even though he has three university degrees! Ha ha.

The reason I shared all of that is because I know that increasing the amount of days I exercise has made all the difference in my body's continually improving physical capabilities. Not to mention what it's done for the way my clothes fit! Yes, even though my weight hasn't fluctuated more than about two to four pounds this entire time I've been exercising (I still love chocolate!), I absolutely see a difference in my muscle definition and reduced body fat. Remember, muscle weighs more than fat! :) Again, my clothes fit even better now and I love it!

Truly, the best part of exercising that frequently is the fact that my body can basically do any physical challenge I put in its way! *Disclaimer: I don't want my previous sentence to be misleading. I'm not perfect and I'm most definitely not at Michael Vazquez's fitness level. I doubt I'd ever get to that point in my exercising simply because I'm not willing to workout for hours upon hours every day. However, if I were given the option of getting paid thousands of dollars just to workout, I'd probably rethink my stance!

I believe the combination of P90X and Insanity are a match made in exercise heaven! P90X and Insanity are amazing all by themselves for so many reasons (read my previous posts, "Exercise Prosperity: My Review of P90X" and "Exercise Prosperity: My Review of INSANITY), but when you combine them together, the benefits are immeasurable!

Yes, because of my awesome video arrangement and increased workout days, my body is progressing by leaps and bounds every week! I was shocked a few weeks ago to discover that my 12-pound weights are starting to feel light during some P90X exercises. I can't believe I need to buy 15-pound weights because I never thought I'd get to that point! To some people that weight may seem so light, but for me—who started out with eight pounds feeling heavy, it's quite a positive and weighty progression! :)

Without further ado, here is my schedule of P90X and Insanity videos. Of course, anyone can put these DVDs in any order they want, but for me, this is the arrangement I like the very best. I like alternating Tony with Shaun T. every other day; I like alternating strength and cardio every other day. The only problem I had is that Insanity could have used one more video because I end up having two P90X videos two days in a row. (No, I didn't want to include Insanity's "Fit Test" because it's just not as fun for me—and I'm all about fun!) That said, it doesn't bother me because one of the P90X videos is strength, while the next one is cardio—it's all good.

• Day 1: P90X Plyometrics—58:37

• Day 2: Insanity Cardio Recovery—33:02

• Day 3: P90X Back and Biceps—51:36; Ab Ripper X—16:08

• Day 4: Insanity Max Interval Circuit—59:50

• Day 5: P90X Yoga X—1:32:25

• Day 6: Insanity Cardio Power and Resistance—39:19

• Day 7: P90X Legs and Back—58:55; Ab Ripper X—16:08

• Day 8: Insanity Pure Cardio—38:17; Cardio Abs—16:45

• Day 9: P90X Chest, Shoulders and Triceps—55:45; Ab Ripper X—16:08

• Day 10: P90X Cardio X—43:18

• Day 11: Insanity Max Interval Plyo—55:11

• Day 12: P90X Core Synergistics—57:26

• Day 13: Insanity Plyometric Cardio Circuit—41:47

• Day 14: P90X Chest and Back—52:50; Ab Ripper X—16:08

• Day 15: Insanity Max Cardio Conditioning—47:41; Cardio Abs—16:45

• Day 16: P90X Kenpo X—58:45

• Day 17: Insanity Max Recovery—47:16

• Day 18: P90X Shoulders and Arms—59:54; Ab Ripper X—16:08

• Day 19: Insanity Core Cardio and Balance—37:19

Looking at that list of exercise videos is so exciting to me! First of all, I love that it takes 19 days of exercising to get through my schedule. Also, unlike the rest of the hybrid programs out there, I love having a new video each day I exercise! I really don't like doing the same videos on the same days of the week, for weeks in a row. Yes, I'm all about variety, and my P90X and INSANITY Workout Schedule accomplishes exactly that!

I just love thinking about the endless hard work I've done over the past 21+ months. I can't help but delight in the physical and mental benefits I've received by doing P90X and Insanity together—I could shout my happiness to the world from a megaphone in a hot air balloon! ;) But since I'm not a wizard, feel free to share my Exercise Prosperity posts with anyone you like! I would absolutely love it if my exercise experiences were beneficial to others! :)

P.S. In case you were wondering, the order of the DVDs in my photo go left-to-right, top-to-bottom. Also, the P90X strength videos already have Ab Ripper X on each video, I just didn't have enough room to write it on the note cards. :)

Exercise Prosperity: My Review of INSANITY

Today I'll be reviewing the Insanity exercise program created by Shaun T.! This is my fourth post in my Exercise Prosperity series.

After thoroughly researching Insanity, I ordered it from Amazon in June, 2015. Because of all the reviews I read—about how sweaty you get while doing Insanity—I also ordered an eight feet by six feet Square 36 extra large exercise mat, also from Amazon. Last year, my Square 36 mat cost 20 dollars less than it does now, so I'm really glad I purchased it when I did! As an FYI, if any of you decide to buy a Square 36 exercise mat from Amazon, you'll save about 15 dollars vs. buying it from the Square 36 website. That said, be sure to read their detailed information because it is filled with good news about how their mats are made. :)

I began exercising to Insanity just like I had with P90X (see my previous post Exercise Prosperity: My Review of P90X): by following their scheduled video routines, three times per week. After I did the first two weeks worth of videos, I was concerned that I would lose all the muscle mass/strength I gained with P90X because Insanity seemed (at first) that it was only cardio. Thus, I looked at the rest of their video workout schedule and decided to bag it. Instead, I exercised to each video in order.

After finishing the 10 Insanity videos—including Fit Test, I decided to incorporate the nine regular Insanity videos into my P90X video series. I also decided not to follow either program's listed video combinations, but instead created my own list/order! My future P90X/Insanity post will explain how that endeavor turned out!

Here is my list of Insanity supplies/necessities—they truly keep me sane! Ha ha.

• exercise clothing and supportive athletic shoes
• Square 36 exercise mat—I cannot adequately express the love I have for this mat! (Refer to links above.) I was hesitant to pay so much money for a mat (it's expensive!), but it was absolutely worth every penny! I wouldn't want to exercise without my Sq36, and I shudder to think of exercising on carpet ever again! (Again, no one is paying me to write any of this. I just want to share my happiness with the world!)
• water bottle—I usually refill once during each video
• large towel—I legit can soak an entire towel during most Insanity videos! (There are a couple of easier videos where I still sweat, but not quite as much.) Okay, it's not dripping wet, but it totally feels like I toweled off after taking a shower!
• hair in a bun on the crown of my head—it's the only way I can do Insanity without losing my mind! ;)

The first thing everyone should know about Insanity is this: be prepared to be out of breath and sweat a lot! You think I'm exaggerating, but I'm not. I've never breathed so intensely, or sweat so much, in a workout program. Yes, Insanity takes the cake for breathless sweatiness! I remember seeing a hilarious meme on Instagram that said, "Insanity: Straight Outta Can't Breathe." HA! I couldn't agree more!

Secondly, your DVD player's pause button is your best Insanity friend—besides Shaun T., that is! In all seriousness, I believe that pausing each DVD for an extra 30–60 seconds between exercises/intervals is much better than taking a break while running the DVD continuously. Pausing between exercises (only when truly necessary) and finishing all the repetitions will give you a better bang for your buck. You'll feel so accomplished(!) in finishing every part of the workout, vs. missing repetitions. Did that make sense?

Yes, pausing the DVDs will make your overall workout times longer, but to me, it's totally worth it! I mean, if you watch the videos, you'll see that no participant is capable of doing the Insanity workouts uninterrupted from start to finish—not even Shaun T. himself! Every single video demonstrator ends up taking a break for a few seconds at one point, or another.

Each video has a ticker at the bottom of the screen that gives tips/helps in addition to what exercise is coming up next. Those ticker tips frequently say to rest when necessary. Thus, I believe it's better to pause and rest between exercises so you get the benefit of the complete Insanity workout. Don't skimp on any exercise! Just rest to the point that you can catch your breath and your body doesn't get cold (keep moving), then start up again fresh. You'll be amazed at your body's abilities when you rest properly—but again, don't rest too long! :)

Because Insanity is so cardiovascularly challenging (I don't know if cardiovascularly is a word, but I just made it one!), be aware that it could take your body quite a while to adjust. In the beginning, go at your own pace and don't give yourself a heart attack! As time passes, you'll see that your body is adjusting and each video will get a little easier the more often you do them.

I remember the happy day I told Greg, "I die a little less each time I do Insanity!" Ha ha. It's true and feels totally awesome! I'm so much more able to make it through my Insanity videos now than I did last year. One might think that I would have plateaued after doing Insanity for 10 months, but I continually get better every time I do an Insanity video—even though I've done each one countless times! And I'm now able to make it through certain sections of videos without having to rest, whereas before, I had to take frequent rests. I'm so excited with my progress!

Let's delve a little deeper into breathing. I have to give major props to Shaun T. because he taught me how to breathe properly! That may sound ridiculous, but I had no idea I was breathing improperly while doing cardio for all these years—until Shaun T. pointed it out that I was clenching my jaw and throat. Well, he didn't tell me specifically, but you know what I mean! ;)

Once I understood how tense my face and neck were, I consciously relaxed them and my breathing results have markedly improved. Yay! For years, I wondered if I had asthma because I had such a hard time breathing during any cardio workout. Yet because of Shaun T., I finally figured out that my face and neck were just too tense! I'm grateful I've been able to relax. The benefits of fully breathing feel amazing!

To continue, in one of the easier Insanity videos, there's a semi-stationary section that I've really struggled with. Yet I finally realized last week that I simply wasn't breathing big enough for my stressed muscles. Thus, I started breathing as heavily as I possibly could and I totally finished the difficult section! Seriously, friends, learn from me: breathe as enthusiastically and continuously as you possibly can!

Now, a word of caution for anyone exercising to Insanity: while doing the sprinting-type movements, stay on your toes/balls of your feet as much as is humanly possible! At first, I didn't realize the vast importance of that previous sentence. Yet after doing Insanity for several months, my knees began feeling achy. It wasn't good.

I thought my knee pain was due to incorrect stretching, so I started doing a couple of different stretches during the Insanity warm-ups. Unfortunately, my knees started feeling even worse and I quickly realized that one cannot substitute stretches in Insanity: the stretches are there for a reason and must be done completely and correctly!

Over time, my knees started aching during my Insanity workouts, which really scared me because they had previously only ached only after I finished. With all of my knee pain, I was concerned I could be developing arthritis—which is one of my worst nightmares! Thus, I got on my knees and prayed for knee help. Pun intended. :) I felt the answer I received was to do exercise physiology research online.

After reading up on exercising, I realized my problem: during the explosive, high intensity sprinting-type movements, I was trying to protect my knees by landing first on my toes and then coming down fully onto my heels—which is the wrong sprinty thing to do. When sprinting, it's important to land on the toes/balls of the feet only. That type of toe-to-heel movement (I was doing) also slows you down. Yay not me! ;) Happily, my research reiterated there are specific times while doing plyometric exercises when you need to land softly on your entire foot—toes to heels—as I had already been doing. I was relieved that I at least did something right!

So, even though my knees hurt in the beginning (because I was still sore from my improper foot landings), I tried staying on my forefoot (toes/balls of my feet) throughout all of the sprinting-type exercises. It only took a few workout sessions of landing on my forefoot for my knees to start feeling better! Yay! Staying on my toes, and not coming down on my heels, have made all the difference in my knees' feel goods. :) I wonder if that's where the saying, "Stay on your toes!" came from?! And here I always thought it referred to ballet! ;)

My heels occasionally come down while Insanity sprinting (it's impossible to stay on my toes perfectly at all times)—and there are some moves where I need to land briefly on my heels for stabilization, but for the majority of time, I'm in tiptoe shape and knee-pain FREE! I can't tell you how relieved I feel knowing I don't have arthritis—it's beyond lovely!

*All of that said, please don't rely solely on my experience. I'm not an expert and every body is different. I also think the fact that I'm so flexible probably has something do do with my previous knee pain. I'm guessing if I did one of those body mechanics research videos—where they film your body to see how it operates during exercise, I would discover something I'm doing wrong. Yet I really try to listen to my body; I watch my body's reflection in the glass of my entertainment center and TV screen to make sure I'm doing the movements properly.

For great tips on feet strengthening, I enjoyed this article, "5 Foot Strengthening Exercises to Improve Speed, Power, and Balance," by David Weck.

Here's helpful information about plyometrics, "How to Safely Land a Jump During Sports." (It was recently updated.)

This is a good article on sprinting techniques, "9 Steps to Faster Sprinting."

As you might have guessed, Shaun T. is super fast...at least he is to me! I've tried to keep up with Shaun T.'s speed, but my body just does not naturally move as quickly as Shaun T.'s. Despite my slowness, I always try my best! Hey, at least I'm flexible! #yogaAdrie! Yes, I would classify Shaun T. in the supersonic fast cheetah family and probably put myself into the fun flexible ferret family! Ha ha.

By the by, ferrets look like fun family pets! Check out what the American Ferret Association Inc. and Petco have to say about ferrets. I'm not a fan of shedding pet fur, so I don't think I'll become a ferret owner anytime soon. That said, maybe one day I'll be the old lady with a ferret!

The good news is, I've become faster and quicker since working out to Insanity! What's even more amazing are my reflexes. I wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't experienced it myself, but my reflexes are legitimately better since the first half of 2015!

It's been really funny to see that my husband and kids are continually surprised and impressed at my quicker reflexes and reaction times! I can't count how many times they'll playfully toss something my direction, and they're like, "What?! You actually caught that?!" Oh, it makes me laugh when they underestimate my new-found quick skills! Ha ha.

Remember my blog post, Reaction Time, Family time? Yes, I directly attribute all of my speedy improvements to following Shaun T.'s high-speed example! :)

An additional big bit of happiness is the fact that my heart efficiency and lung capacity have improved dramatically! Out of curiosity, when I took my resting heart rate a few weeks ago, I was ecstatic to see that my heart was in the Excellent category! Even better? I was only one heartbeat away from being in the Athlete category! Yippee! While I'm super excited about achieving a great heart-health rating, I'm even happier about the fact that my heart and lungs are thoroughly capable of helping me do any exercise I desire! Seriously, is there anything better than good health?! :)

I greatly appreciate that Shaun T. constantly reminds everyone to contract/tighten/hold-in their abdominal muscles. He does a great job of helping people understand how to do everything with tightened abs! Until I began exercising to Insanity, I never realized just how often my core was looser than it should have been. I'm convinced that Shaun T.'s core words have made all the difference in my abdominal strength!

Don't get me wrong, for P90X is what gave me the initial and amazing changes I see in my abs today, but Insanity helped me take my abs to the next level and really cement those amazing changes. I believe I even lost another inch around my waist simply because I was conscious of contracting my core more often than before! If I were to give Tony Horton one suggestion, it would be to constantly remind his participants to tighten their abs throughout his videos—I'm very conscientious about it now!

I have only a few quotes from Shaun T. to share. You see, whenever I workout to Insanity, I'm simply too exhausted to write down funny/helpful quotes! That said, these are my favorite Shaun T. quotes I wasn't too tired to remember! Ha ha.

"Keep the core contracted." 

"Focus and go!" 

I'm smiling because I love it!"

Yes, Shaun T. is a very supportive trainer; I do much better during my Insanity workouts because of his positive words and attitude!

Another benefit of Insanity is strength in numbers. Seeing real people (the video demonstrators) working their hearts out, sweating like crazy, and struggling to finish (just like me!) helps me do my best and finish every section well—no matter how difficult it is! It sounds mean-ish, but I love knowing others feel my pain! ;) Recognizing I'm not alone in my exercise struggles makes all the difference!

Here are my bonus Insanity thoughts/pointers:

• View the videos as a long-term commitment. They aren't a quick fix. Utilize their "power" for the rest of your lives! :)
• Don't overdo it your first several times—but don't go too easy on yourself. Work hard, but don't keel over! ;)
• Pace yourself regardless how many times you've done the videos.
• Don't ever get discouraged. Keep going, never give up. You can do it!
• Over time, it will get easier!
• It's 100% worth the effort you put into it! You'll feel amazing if you try your best!
• You will see and feel results in your body—especially in your heart and lungs!
• Any other physical benefit you receive from doing Insanity—i.e., your clothes fit better; you look better—is just gravy on top of good health for life!

Lastly, unlike Shaun T., I initially didn't smile when I started doing the Insanity videos. You see, I was convinced I would never be able to fully keep up, and it's not very fun to feel like you're lacking. Am I right?! Now, however, I totally smile every time I do Insanity!

Over the past 21+ months, I've truly learned—without exception—that I feel amazing when my body is in good shape...I promise the same will happen for you, too!

His Grace

Yesterday, I was given the wonderful opportunity of teaching the lesson, "What is Grace?" to "my" Mia Maid class. (I'm the first counselor in my ward's Young Women Presidency.) While I won't go into all of the lesson details, I want to share a smidgen of my experience. I found the following to be highly interesting:

• The young woman in our Mia Maid class presidency who chose this lesson is named Grace.
• Grace wanted to learn more about grace. :)
• Grace specifically wanted me to teach the lesson.
• There are four leaders who teach the Mia Maid class (we have many active members in our ward!), thus, we rotate through a monthly teaching schedule and never know where we'll fall on that schedule, due to others being out of town, etc.
• As I prepared our class' lesson schedule, I was amazed that my turn to teach happened to fall on the "What is Grace?" lesson, :)
• Yesterday just so happened to be the very last Sunday that Grace's family attended our ward because they are moving to a new home.

I didn't know that last bullet point was happening yesterday. I knew her family was moving, yes, but I thought it wouldn't be for at least another month. Thus, even before I went to church yesterday, I was simply excited that "our" Grace was able to have the lesson she wanted taught, by the teacher she wanted to teach it!

When I heard that Grace would be leaving our class, tears came to my eyes. This darling and mighty talented girl has contributed so much to the fun factor in our Young Women! The tears were also there because of the fact that Grace was able to have her very last lesson in our ward be taught about the topic she wanted to know more about: grace! Thus, I was so happy I prepared well for our lesson. I spent a lot of time researching, listening to the talks and creating my handout (below).

Late Saturday night, I felt inspired to print out g r a c e in very big, bold letters to put on our classroom's chalkboard. (Actually, it was very early Sunday morning, due to Daylight Savings, but to me, it was still Saturday night!) Before I created it, I thought, "I've never done a chalkboard printout like this before, why should I do it now? I already have the beautiful handout I spent so much time designing. Why should I do more? And I have my cute little easel to put my handout on, and my favorite picture of our Savior to display. Isn't that enough?" (I wish I could share my picture here, but due to copyright restrictions, I can only share the name: "Christ and the Rich Young Ruler," by Heinrich Hofmann.)

But the thought of g r a c e wouldn't leave my mind, so I knew the chalkboard sign was supposed to be a part of my lesson. I logged back onto my computer and began creating g r a c e. I made the font as big as would possibly fit one letter to a page and cut out the letters so they were almost circular. They were simple, but looked pretty cute—if I do say so myself! :) I packed everything up in my "Time Out For Women" tote and got ready for bed.

So it was really no surprise when we found out it was Grace's last Sunday. I thought to myself, "Ah ha! Now I get it!" I knew right then and there that Heavenly Father was giving Grace (and the rest of us) a little sign {g r a c e} that He is very aware of each and every one of us! I knew that He wanted Grace to feel just how loved she is by Him and our ward's Young Women organization. He wanted Grace to know that He knew of the importance of the lesson she wanted taught...by the teacher she wanted to teach it...on the very last day she would be able to attend the ward she was raised in!

This event was no small matter, and I made certain my Mia Maid class understood that as I was putting g r a c e on the chalkboard with magnets—Grace loved seeing her name up there! :) Of course, I made sure that all of my Mia Maids know they are equally loved and important! (But none of them will be going through as huge of a life change this week as Grace—leaving the only home she's known since birth.)

Here are the amazing talks I listened to this past week—I'm certain I'll listen to them again!

The Gift of Grace

By President Dieter F. Uchtdorf

Second Counselor in the First Presidency

Bear Up Their Burdens with Ease

By Elder David A. Bednar

Of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles

Each of those talks brought tears to my eyes as I thought about the eternal love our Heavenly Father and Savior Jesus Christ have for each and every one of us! It blows my mind! :)

While I wasn't able to delve into the above-listed talks in class as much as I wanted (due to time constraints), I felt happy that (I think!) my Mia Maids left our class with a better understanding of His Grace. I also found no coincidence in the fact that the closing song of our sacrament meeting was "O Savior, Thou Who Wearest a Crown"—it was meant to be! I shared these lyrics with my Mia Maids, for they went along perfectly with our lesson!

"No creature is so lowly,
No sinner so depraved,
But feels thy presence holy
And thru thy love is saved.
Tho craven friends betray thee,
They feel thy love's embrace;
The very foes who slay thee
Have access to thy grace."

Yes, we all have access to His Grace, and for that, I'm incredibly grateful! As much as I understand grace (sorry, I won't write more about it here because I need to go eat dinner with My Gregor!), I know my soul will only fully comprehend the magnitude of His Grace once I get to the other side. I expect that to be true for everyone. Until then, I'll be focused on this glorious scripture that is beloved across eternity!

"I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me." – Philippians 4:13

I love it!!!

Happily Marching On!

Wow, I have been MIA for a long time! I think this is the longest I've gone without writing a blog post ever! Yes, there has been a lot going on in my little world.

Remember the possible trial I wrote about several weeks ago? Well, it most definitely showed up—except, it wasn't the trial I was expecting. The trial I thought would manifest itself in one child actually reared its trying head in another one of my children!

It's interesting because I can see very clearly now that the Lord had been preparing me through one child, so I could be ready for the trial in my other child. I won't go into personal details here because the trial my child endured is very personal.

Suffice it to say, with this new trial, we've had to deal with physical issues that we've never dealt with before. Those physical issues translated into emotional issues, too. A minor—yet still very nerve-wracking—surgery was performed on my precious child. Thankfully, the outcome was better-than-expected! I could finally breathe! That said, our finances have been put through the ringer—which induced a whole new level of breathlessness in my soul! But due to the miracle of tithing blessings, and a very generous grandmother (Thank you, my sweetest Mama!), we are still hanging on! This quote (below) describes perfectly how I feel! And I can totally imagine Rod cheerfully shaking my shoulders and yelling to me,

"You are hanging on by a very thin thread and I dig that about you!" – Rod Tidwell, Jerry Maguire (From the edited, clean movie version! Ha ha.)

I created this using the Arizona Sun Devils' color codes! Remember the other Rod Tidwell quote? "I'm from Arizona, Jerry! I broke Arizona records! I went to Arizona State! I'm a Sun Devil, man!" Thus, I just had to go with that color scheme. Ha ha.

Oh, that quote makes me laugh every time I think about it! :) These moments in life are precisely why we need good entertainment in our world!

But back to the trial coming to my family in a different way than we expected, isn't that the way life always is? I've come to realize (yet again!) that no matter how much we prepare, there is literally no way we can ever be truly prepared for everything. It's impossible to predict what this life will throw at us! Thus, I believe the best way to prepare for every trial we face is to cultivate a truly deep, personal, meaningful and eternal relationship with our Heavenly Father, through His Son, Jesus Christ. The fabulous scripture found in John 14:26 is perfectly applicable to my trial:

"But the Comforter, which is the Holy Ghost, whom the Father will send in my name, he shall teach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you."

Yes, I've needed the Holy Ghost so much during the past two months! Of course, I need and rely on him every day, but it was never more apparent than during our trial.

As I reflect on the worrisome feelings I had as we faced this new medical challenge, and the money involved(!), I'm beyond grateful for my strong testimony of our Heavenly Father, Jesus Christ, and for the influence of the Holy Ghost!

I can't help but think back to the day I lovingly held my child in my bed, intensely and sincerely praying for relief. It amazes me to this day that in the very moment of my child's greatest moment of pain and fear, my powerful prayers were totally answered. My child was instantly comforted, a major problem was revealed and simultaneously resolved! There is no doubt in my mind that our Heavenly Father heard me! It was no small miracle to this concerned mother. And I will never forget the sun spilling through my window, warming us, as if to say, "Don't worry, it will be all right!"

*Side note: I'm not writing about my "powerful" prayers in a proud way. I'm simply illustrating that I literally felt a power come from within me as I fervently prayed for my suffering child. I felt as if a channel or tunnel was coming directly out of my soul, sending my prayers straight to Heavenly Father in our time of sincerest need. Plus, my husband was out of town on business, so there was no one in my house who could give my child a priesthood blessing. (No, my child didn't want me to call anyone to come help, and I respected that.) Shortly after that amazing experience is when I took my child to the doctor—for the second time during our trial (one of many appointments)—and the result of that prayer was manifest in my child's test results. {And of course, my husband gave our child a priesthood blessing before the minor surgery. When Greg is home, I totally utilize his marvelous priesthood power! :)}

Even in my moments of profound motherly worry, I received this inspiration from the Holy Ghost, "Don't worry, _____ will be okay." He didn't tell me everything would be beach resorts filled with lazy ease and fine luxury, but I knew we wouldn't be devastated by this trial—and that, my friends, is worth everything!

Thus, after the upheaval of the past two months (Our trial was barely beginning when I wrote my previous blog post and I never, ever expected it to go the direction it went!)—as well as just the normal, everyday busyness of life—I hope to begin blogging more regularly again. Yay! I have so many things to write about! I tell ya, I could write for hours a day and never get bored! Ha ha.

So, I will end with this: Today, March 1st, 2016, is the third anniversary of when my darling Gregor told me we were moving back to Utah (from Texas)! 03/01/13 will forever remain in my list of "Happiest Dates Ever!" Oh yes, I am happily marching on, and I hope you are, too! Seriously, every day we are granted on this earth is such a blessing! We have so much to live for and so many people to love! Now, let's get out there and make this world a better place! :)

P.S. I know that fasting also helped my beloved child during this trial—there is no doubt in my mind! :)

The Right to Believe What We Believe

*Update: Before you read this lengthy post, please know that on 04/04/2019, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints changed its policy that I wrote about below. If you can find the time, please read the entire news release "Policy Changes Announced for Members in Gay Marriages, Children of LGBT Parents."

Even though the Church's policy has changed, I'm leaving this blog post as-is for the sake of history. You have to admit that this policy saga is super fascinating, right?!

I still totally love and fully support my church and its leaders. I am and will remain an active member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints forever! I wholeheartedly believe in inspiration and continuing revelation—both personally, and for The Church as a whole.

With that said, read on, and I hope you have a beautiful day!


The past two+ weeks have been interesting—to say the least—for my church and its members. (In case this is your first visit to Enthusiastic Fantastic, you might like to know that I'm a very happy member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints!) I was surprised that some of my church's policy information was sneakily released to the media on November 6th, 2015. That said, I wasn't surprised about the content of the news, just the way in which the news was released—for it wasn't released by the Church's typical channels.

Because I'm not on Fakebook anymore, I don't know for sure where the news story first broke. All I know is that one of the blogs I follow, Fair Mormon, released the first blog post I saw about it: "A Look at the Church’s New Policy on Children of Gay Couples." It's a great read, I highly recommend it. Here is the information verbatim from Fair Mormon that first introduced me to what was going on in my church:

• Those who enter into a same-sex marriage are considered apostate, and will need to undergo Church discipline possibly resulting in disfellowshipment or excommunication;
• Local leaders should seriously consider Church discipline against members cohabitating in same-sex relationships but not married;
• Minor children in same-sex households are not to be baptized into the Church until they reach adulthood. At that point they must understand and accept the Church’s doctrine regarding the sinfulness of same-sex acts and marriages in order to be baptized

Later that night, I watched Elder Christofferson's explanation of the Church's policy move (that previously linked update came a few days later): Elder Christofferson Provides Context on Handbook Changes Affecting Same-Sex Marriages (click the link to watch the video).

I thought those two sources were very clear and self-explanatory. I was not confused as to where the Church stood on the issue of same-sex marriage within its membership. Thus, I was surprised at the uproar seemingly everywhere on the internet, local/national media, and social media—and even within my own extended family. I mean, it's not a huge surprise where the Church stands in regard to SSM, so I couldn't understand why everyone was so shocked with the policy change—especially after the Church further explained and kindly clarified their position.

My church has been talking about the importance of families forever—and especially in the past 20 years! For reference, please read "THE FAMILY, A PROCLAMATION TO THE WORLD," that was released in 1995. Not to mention, please notice how many videos The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints has produced about families and religious freedom—and I didn't even include them all. (You don't need to watch all of them, I just included the links in case anyone is interested.)

Our Eternal Life - What Do Mormons Believe?

Home and Family – Through Small Things

Happy Families—a playlist of videos about families

Building Families

Protect Our Nestlings – Keeping our Families Safe

Earthly Father, Heavenly Father

Motherhood: an Eternal Partnership with God

Our Fun Family Vacation – The Importance of Spending Time With Family

Families Can Be Together Forever

The Mormon Practice of Family Home Evening

Expressions of Love

Elder Ballard Addresses Importance of Traditional Marriage at World Congress of Families

October 2015 World Report: Religious Freedom Ministry

October 2015 World Report: Namibia Saints Stand for Religious Freedom

Preserving Religious Freedom

Full Speech: Elder Cook Speaks on Religious Freedom at Australia Law School

Full Speech: Elder Jeffrey R. Holland Speaks on Faith, Family and Religious Freedom at Chapman University

Religious Freedom and Nondiscrimination News Conference

At Vatican Summit, Mormon Leader Calls for “Renaissance” of Happy Marriages

Mormonism: A Christ-Centered, Global Faith

Evangelical and Mormon Leaders Gather in Tabernacle to Promote Faith, Religious Freedom

Mormon Apostle Promotes Religious Freedom

What Is Religious Freedom?

Strengthening the Free Exercise of Religion – Elder Dallin H. Oaks

Also, the major motion picture, Meet The Mormons, does a great job of introducing what the Church is all about. I wish everyone on the planet would watch it! :)

Yes, with all of those previously listed sources, there should be zero surprises about where the Church stands in regard to same-sex marriage.

As the past 17 days have unfolded, I've read and listened to many sources about the topic shared above. Here some of the links to what I've been researching (There are other sources I've read/watched/listened to that I won't be linking.):

"A North and South Heart," a blog post on Rational Faiths, by Tom Christofferson—the gay brother of Elder D. Todd Christofferson, an LDS apostle

Articles by Jean Lloyd from The Witherspoon Institute, Public Discourse:

• "Rending the Rainbow Veil: How to Make Your Church a Safe Space for Christians with Same-Sex Attraction"
• "The Girl in the Tuxedo: Two Variations on Sexual Orientation and Gender Identity"

Podcasts by Radio West:

• "The New LDS Church Policy on Same-Sex Families"—There were several comments made in this podcast that rubbed me the wrong way. I didn't like the way some of the guests were making my church and its members out to be "evil meanies" (they didn't say that, it's just how I felt they were portraying us) because we're not evil nor mean!
• "Nature, Nurture, Sexuality, & Gender"—This one is a must listen!

"Taught By Her Mothers," a podcast on the blog, Mormon Women Project

"Why We Fear Mormons," an opinion post by J. Spencer Fluhman on The New York Times

"Petition asks Mormon Tabernacle Choir guests to cancel appearances over policy change," a Salt Lake Tribune article

Two important articles released by The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints—these are the most recent updates:

• "Understanding the Handbook"
• "First Presidency Clarifies Church Handbook Changes"

"Pride and Faith," the recently-released video by Scott Raia. His video's tagline reads, "A BYU film student documents his growing awareness of the LGBT community, especially within the Mormon church. He sees his nervousness for graduation from college as a something of a parallel for the uncertainty faced by some of his friends as they transition to adulthood as gay Mormons."

"WITH GAY MORMONS," a blog post by Jeff Benedict

"Religion is changing, fellowship too," an article in the Harvard Gazette. This one isn't about the Church, but it's an interesting read in terms of religion as a whole.

Hopefully, anyone reading my blog can see that I check a wide variety of sources for information. I most definitely do not live inside a vacuum! ;) I truly try my best to see all sides of every life issue before coming to a conclusion or making a decision. Thus, please believe me when I say that after all of my researching, I don't have a problem with my church's same-sex marriage policy. The information my church has presented makes sense to me. No, my support of the Church and its leaders does not make me heartless nor a bigot. Oh no, it most certainly does not! (By the way, I strongly dislike that previously mentioned b-word.)

While I hope this blog post doesn't attract haters, there's no guarantee of that not happening (Did I say that right? Or, is it a double negative? I'm overcome with wordiness! Ha ha.), which makes me a little nervous. That said, I still want to share my opinion on the subject.

First off, despite what others may think or say, I truly believe the Church has no ill will directed at the LGBT community—none whatsoever—and for the record, I don't, either. (For more on my views of my country's actions toward legalizing SSM, please read my post "The Supreme Court's Decision"—I wrote it before the historic and final announcement.) The Church's leaders have simply stated what they believe is right and true. I support my church leaders 100% because I believe they receive direct inspiration and revelation from the Lord, which means this policy change has been given to them directly from the Lord.

Speaking of the inspiration/revelation of the Church's leaders, I love this marvelous quote by Elder Bednar of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles. He said in his October, 2015, General Conference talk, "Chosen to Bear Testimony of My Name,"

"Serving with these representatives of the Lord [in the First Presidency and the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles], I have come to know their greatest desire is to discern and do the will of our Heavenly Father and His Beloved Son. As we counsel together, inspiration has been received and decisions have been made that reflect a degree of light and truth far beyond human intelligence, reasoning, and experience. As we work together in unity on perplexing problems, our collective understanding of an issue has been enlarged in marvelous ways by the power of the Holy Ghost."

Second, I get frustrated when people who aren't members—or are less-active members—of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints get so opinionated about something they don't even want to be a part of themselves! Seriously, what?! I wish I could say to them: Why are you being mean toward the Church and its members when you're not following its teachings, and you want nothing to do with it anyway?!

It's ridiculous to me that the only time haters care about the Church or its policies is when the Church has made a stand that the haters don't agree with. That's like me having an opinion about any number of other churches' policies. Am I an active/participating member of said church that I'm having issues with? No? Well, then I don't get to have a say about how they run their church. If, however, I was an actively participating member of said church whose policies I disagreed with, then I'd have something to talk about.

*Side note: I saw a news clip about the "mass" membership resignation of Church members that happened Saturday, November 14th. What I think needs to be pointed out is this quote from KUTV 2News:

"When asked if those in the LGBT community are actively wanting their children to be raised in the LDS faith, Matson replied, 'Honestly, no. They don't...'

"A recent poll conducted by event organizers and posted on the LDS Mass Resignation Facebook page shows only 5 percent of those who resigned this weekend attend an LDS church on a weekly or monthly basis."

So not only do most of those in the LGBT community not even want to be a part of the Church, only 125 of the approximately 2,500 people giving up their membership in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints are actively participating members! Yeah, I'm pretty sure 2,500 members out of the Church's total population of 15+ million doesn't constitute the definition of a "mass resignation." (At least that's the number I've researched in the media up to this point.)

Third, I've been puzzled by some active Latter-Day Saints' negative reactions to the Church's new policy. To them I say: Pray for guidance and peace. Please read or watch all of the statements put forth by the Church. (I linked them above.) Realize that either you do or you don't support the Church and its leaders. (I support the Church and its leaders.) Either the brethren are spiritually in tune, or they're not. (I believe they are in tune.) Either they've made the correct policy update, or they haven't. (I believe they are acting according to the revelation/inspiration they've received from the Lord. Refer to the comment I previously shared by Elder Bednar.) If you believe the brethren/leaders are in tune to inspiration and revelation from the Lord, through the Holy Ghost, then accept what they've done. (I've accepted their actions, and apparently so have the vast majority of the Church's members.)

*Side note: I've been writing this blog post for a little over one week. Late last night, as I was shutting down my computer, I read a beautiful blog post, "Sustaining, Suffering and Enduring Each Other," by Bruce E. Dale, Interpreter, A Journal of Mormon Scripture. Brother Dale does a wonderful job of defining and describing what it means to sustain the Church's leaders and members. It is so worth five minutes of your time! :)

Fourth, for years, the Church has stood up for what it genuinely believes is right and true: that same-sex marriage should not be legalized. I think it's fair to say that the Church did literally everything within its power to prevent that legal social change. But once the Supreme Court legalized SSM, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints supported the law, while simultaneously requesting that rights for religious freedom be protected. For reference, please see Elder Dallin H. Oaks' General Conference talk, "Loving Others and Living with Differences," given in October, 2014. His marvelous words were presented just two days before SSM was legalized in Utah—which catapulted the Supreme Court's country-wide decision. I know I've already shared portions of this talk previously, but I feel it's good enough to share again:

We all have the right to live according to our religious/spiritual beliefs and consciences, as is presented in an awesome PBS video I watched a few days ago (linked below). Religious liberty/freedom should not be squashed by anyone—including those who request tolerance and acceptance of their personal views and choices, but aren't willing to extend the same generosity to those with deeply held religious beliefs!

Russell Moore said,

"No one wants to see our gay and lesbian neighbors mistreated, bullied, harmed. At the same time, we need to protect the pluralism of the public square that allows people to dissent from whatever the dogma of "the church of the sexual revolution" is. And that's the dangerous place that we're in right now, is there are many people who are suggesting that this wave of sexual revolution ought to trump religious liberty and conscience rights in a way that simply paves over the consciences of people. That's not the sort of society we ought to live in."

To see more of Mr. Moore's fabulous interview, please watch the video "Russell Moore on LGBT Acceptance," produced by PBS' Religion & Ethics Newsweekly.

Of course, I could have easily shared many of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints' leader's speeches on religious freedom, but I chose to share the perspective of Russell Moore—President of the Southern Baptist Ethics & Religious Liberty Commission—simply to illustrate that the Church is not the only church that feels this way.

So where are we now? Obviously, same-sex marriage is legal in the United States of America and in other countries across the world. While there are many places that same-sex couples can get married, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints isn't one of them. The Church has the right to unequivocally state that they won't support or allow SSM within their membership, church buildings or temples. They aren't holding anyone back from being allowed the standard/legal definition of marriage in the worldly sense, but when it comes to the Lord's way of eternal marriage, yes, the Church has put their foot down—and they have every right to do so. The Lord has drawn the line in the sand so there is zero confusion about same-sex marriage—it's not up for debate in the Church.

What some people are forgetting (or conveniently ignoring?) is that not only does the Church not allow SSM, but it also has the following list of dos and don'ts that apply to all current and potential church members (I included as many as I could find/remember):

• no abortions
• no abuse of any person
• no alcohol, coffee, tea, tobacco, drugs, etc., i.e., Church members are to follow/obey the Word of Wisdom
• no sexual sin (homo or hetero)—the Church takes the law of chastity very seriously
• keep our baptismal covenants and temple covenants we've made through those sacred ordinances (temple and covenants are two separate links) 
• keep the Ten Commandments—as part of the covenants we've made

• no gambling
• faithfully and consistently wear temple garments—for adults who have made covenants in the temple 
• no pornography
• no polygamy/plural marriage
• worship God, our Heavenly Father
• pray and read our scriptures daily—these aren't commandments, so-to-speak, but they're highly encouraged habits
• attend our church meetings on a regular basis
• attend the temple as often as time permits—we are encouraged to make it a priority
• honorably hold and exercise the priesthood—for men only
• no profanity/swearing
• dress modestly
• repent as often as needed
• have reverence for sacred things including: God, Jesus Christ, the Holy Ghost, the Church, temples, etc.
• make sacrifices to follow Jesus Christ and His gospel
• no same-sex marriage
• serve in the Church and our communities—to the extent possible by each individual
• no tattoos—that said, having tattoos won't cause a person to be disciplined by the Church
• pay a full/honest tithe
• avoid unwed pregnancy—this sounds harsh, but the Church does everything within its power to help unwed mothers (click on the link above)
• be virtuous, i.e., have high moral standards
• do our best to "build up" Zion, i.e., the pure in heart

To further illustrate my point, Doctrine and Covenants 38:16 tells us (emphasis added), "And for your salvation I give unto you a commandment, for I have heard your prayers, and the poor have complained before me, and the rich have I made, and all flesh is mine, and I am no respecter of persons."—meaning the Lord's commandments apply to everyone.

To go along with that scripture, I found this awesome quote by President Joseph Fielding Smith, the 10th president of the Church,

"It should be conceded by all people that since the Almighty governs the entire universe by immutable law, man, who is the greatest of all his creations, must himself be subject to such law." – "Chapter 18: Living by Every Word that Proceeds from the Mouth of God," Teachings of Presidents of the Church: Joseph Fielding Smith.

It's no secret that the Lord expects the same devoted discipleship from every member of the Church! And when we make mistakes, the Atonement of Jesus Christ is there to help us out—pending we utilize it through our full repentance! :)

I hope I've illustrated that the same-sex-marriage-is-not-allowed-in-the-Church issue is a much smaller fraction of what it means to be an active and faithful member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints than what the media is portraying. There will always be fluidity in the membership of the Church due to people becoming (and hopefully staying) converted, while simultaneously others neglect their personal testimonies (and all that encompasses) and become inactive members, or resign from the Church altogether. If people want to leave the Church, surely SSM won't be the only reason they choose to focus on.

What it all comes down to is this: we each have the right to believe what we believe! Those negatively affected by the Church's SSM policy change always have the option to make different choices in order to access those beautiful and sacred ordinances, and receive the promised blessings.

Just like any actively participating Latter-Day Saint, everyone who has heard of the Church can choose to obey its teachings...we can all be blessed for our faithfulness. If people decide to follow our Savior, and do what is required to become and stay an active member of the Church, there are no restrictions holding anyone back—the "Blessings of the Gospel [are] Available to All"! That previous link is a talk by Elder Joseph W. Sitati.

As I've been happily thinking about what The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints means to me, I get emotional if I try to envision my life without it. Because of the Church's teachings, I have been brought closer to our Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ than I ever could have imagined! My relationship with Them is, of course, made possible due to the Holy Ghost daily speaking to my spirit—and I wouldn't have received the gift of the Holy Ghost without my baptism in the Church! And don't even get me started about the amazing people I've met through my membership in the Church, for my life would be completely different without their positive influence!

Also, I can't help but reflect back on these lovely scriptures and their meanings—as I understand them (emphasis added):

Luke 12:6–7, "Are not five sparrows sold for two farthings, and not one of them is forgotten before God? But even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not therefore: ye are of more value than many sparrows." *We are all important to our Heavenly Father and Savior.

Isaiah 25:8, "He will swallow up death in victory; and the Lord God will wipe away tears from off all faces..." *We are all saved; the Lord will always be there to comfort us.

Colossians 3:2, "Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth." *Don't get sidetracked by worldly issues, we need to keep our focus on eternity.

Colossians 1:23, "...continue in the faith grounded and settled, and be not moved away from the hope of the gospel..." *We must stay strong and true to Jesus Christ and His gospel!

Romans 8:35; 37–39, "Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? ...Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us. For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord." *Heavenly Father will always love us and wants us to come back to Him; our Savior's Atonement makes up for every trial/problem we're given in this life (but that doesn't mean we should give up following the Savior's example—none of us get a free ride!); Jesus Christ is our connection to God, our Heavenly Father.

John 6:68–69, "Then Simon Peter answered him, Lord, to whom shall we go? thou hast the words of eternal life. And we believe and are sure that thou art that Christ, the Son of the living God." *Those verses say it all: who or what else can give us all that Jesus Christ and His gospel offers? I'd also like to point out that with this scripture (there are many others to reference), God the Father and His Son, Jesus Christ, are established: the trinity is incorrect.

John 14:15, 21, "If ye love me, keep my commandments... ...He that hath my commandments, and keepeth them, he it is that loveth me: and he that loveth me shall be loved of my Father, and I will love him, and will manifest myself to him." *We can show our love and devotion to our Savior by keeping His commandments. Our Heavenly Father will love us even more for following Jesus Christ.

Alma 34:32, "For behold, this life is the time for men [and women] to prepare to meet God..." *This scripture is one of my favorites! I always shorten the verse simply because I feel there is nothing else to say! :) We must do everything within our power to be prepared to meet our Heavenly Father!

Finally, I love this statement by President Joseph Fielding Smith, for his words say it all (emphasis added)!

"If we are living the religion which the Lord has revealed and which we have received, we do not belong to the world. We should have no part in all its foolishness. We should not partake of its sins and its errors—errors of philosophy and errors of doctrine, errors in regard to government, or whatever those errors may be—we have no part in it. 

"The only part we have is the keeping of the commandments of God. That is all, being true to every covenant and every obligation that we have entered into and taken upon ourselves. 

"Do not get the impression from what I have said that I feel that we should keep aloof from everybody outside of the Church and not associate with them. I have not said that, but I do want us to be consistent Latter-day Saints, and if the people of the world walk in darkness and sin and contrary to the will of the Lord, there is the place for us to draw the line." – "Chapter 19: In the World but Not of the World," Teachings of Presidents of the Church: Joseph Fielding Smith.

What I find interesting about the quotes I shared from President Joseph Fielding Smith, is the fact that, yesterday morning, I mistakenly thought the Church's 2015 curriculum has us studying President Smith—even though I subconsciously knew full well that we are studying President Benson! (Because I'm the first counselor in my ward's Young Women organization, I don't get to study the Teachings of Presidents of the Church lessons in Relief Society. Thus, every so often, I listen to the lessons on my phone while I'm getting ready for the day.) I strongly believe the Spirit (Holy Ghost) wanted me to think we were studying President Smith so I would find his steadfast words for precisely this post! :)

When all is said and done, I simply don't want to have squandered my days here on Earth. As imperfect as I am, I'm trying my best to be prepared to one day meet God and Jesus Christ—and I want to bring as many prepared people with me as I can (so to speak). I truly believe the Church is the vehicle of choice to safely deliver each and every one of us back to Them! :)