My Jerry Maguire Moment

At 10:37 p.m. this past Friday, I published a blog post that took me a couple of days to write. It was a deep, heartfelt, very raw piece of work. I worried about sharing it here on Enthusiastic Fantastic because it contained a lot of truths that would probably hurt the feelings of my childhood family (i.e., my "first" family; the family of my birth), and possibly further damage our relationships, but I posted it anyway. 😬

Around 4:30 a.m. on Saturday, I awoke with my heart pounding and the thoughts rushed into my mind, "What have I done?! I need to go revert my blog post back to a draft RIGHT NOW!" Yes, it was a true Jerry Maguire moment—I laugh that I now feel such a kinship to a fictional character! 😂

Like Jerry at the beginning of his journey, I typed and typed and typed to create my truth-filled blog post! I endlessly wrote my feelings about, observations of, and solutions to my issues with members of my childhood family—things I've thought throughout the years but haven't said publicly. It was such a therapeutic opportunity for me and I loved every minute of it! 💛 But then the panic set in, just like Jerry Maguire's realization moment!

Sadly, this YouTube clip doesn't show Jerry's pit-in-the-stomach scene when he finally internalizes what he's done by creating his 25-page memo and sharing it with everyone in his company (they edited it out 👎). Spoiler alert! Jerry's bold, truthful actions got him fired!

Side note: you can watch Jerry Maguire (the creator of this video clip spelled Maguire wrong!) for free on Amazon if you're willing to watch it with commercials! 😃 *Also, I don't normally endorse rated R movies, but I saw Jerry Maguire when I was a very young adult and I hadn't made the commitment to not watch rated R movies. I personally own the content-edited-for-TV version and I absolutely love it! #noswearing 😀 Despite its conflicts in many areas with my personal beliefs and commitments, Jerry Maguire has some great universal truths that everyone can learn from.

I had the same type of freak-out thoughts when I awoke so early Saturday morning: If members of my childhood family read my brutally honest blog post, they just might not recover! I could be fired from my childhood family! 😂 And, when I really thought about it, no, I didn't and don't want to be fired from my childhood family. Because, for good and bad, family is family, after all. 💔

I quickly got out of bed and sleepily hurried down the stairs as speedily as I could without falling over—I always get headrush when I get out of bed too fast! When I pulled up my blog's stats on "Hmm, What to Say," I was relieved to see that only three people had viewed my blog post—whew!—and I was one, if not two of them! Ha ha. 😅 After I clicked "Revert to draft," I felt immediate relief! My heart quit pounding, and I happily and very slowly went back upstairs to bed. I instantly fell back asleep and slept well the rest of the night.

When I awoke a few hours later, I wondered if I had overreacted by reverting "Hmm, What to Say" back to a draft. I pulled up my blog post on my phone—thankfully, it was still there from the night before! I felt so sneaky reading my blog post that technically wasn't there anymore—it was such my fun little secret! 😄 That sounds so silly, but I loved it!

I read through "Hmm, What to Say" again and was very happy 😇 with my blogging efforts—it was a great post that I loved writing and reading! Yet after analyzing my words in the very bright morning light of my corner bedroom, I knew I had made the right decision to revert it back to a draft and not keep it posted here.

Sunday, after church, while Greg and I were having a deep conversation about both of our childhood families, I read "Hmm, What to Say" to him. It was such fun reading aloud my words that I had so painstakingly composed. Greg thought it was a great post, too! Yay! Disclaimer: I gushed quite a bit about Greg in my post, so of course he enjoyed it! Ha ha.

Greg eventually agreed with me that I shouldn't post "Hmm, What to Say" on my blog. He only admitted that after I pestered him to really tell me what he thought. Greg is and has always been 100% supportive of my blogging efforts here on Enthusiastic Fantastic. He continually says, "Write whatever you want! It's your blog!" and has never wanted to get in the way of any of my blog posts. So it took a lot for him to tell me not to post it—and I definitely listened to him because of that fact.

In the end, I'm so thankful I took the time to blog about something so serious, even though I didn't keep it published here. Writing is so therapeutic to my soul, it always makes me a better version of myself! I especially love blogging and always will! I'm so truly grateful to Blogger for hosting such a great space where I can share myself on the World Wide Web! Thank you, Blogger, from the bottom of my heart! 😘

Here is a quote from Elder Neal A. Maxwell's brilliant talk, "Enduring Well," that we can all learn from. His words apply to every experience we have in this life—especially when it comes to our families. 😊

"Part of enduring well consists of being meek enough, amid our suffering, to learn from our relevant experiences. Rather than simply passing through these things, they must pass through us and do so in ways which sanctify these experiences for our good (see D&C 122:7). Thereby, our empathy, too, is enriched and everlasting."

I am grateful for Elder Maxwell's wise words and will try my best to remember them when dealing with my childhood family and our ongoing issues.

Finally, I found this fabulous dress (photos below ↓) at Lulus for a fantastic price of only $14! Yes, I really did! Believe it! 😄 This dress is no longer available, as Lulus' inventory moves very quickly—especially when it's on sale. But Lulus always has amazing dresses and if you watch their website closely, you can frequently get outstanding deals like this one. That said, if you find a dress that you absolutely can't live without, I don't recommend waiting for it to go on sale because you might miss out on your size! And I don't want anyone living with dress regrets! 😂

*By the by, I'm not being paid or sponsored in any way to share my thoughts about Lulus—they are mine and mine alone without any sort of outside influence whatsoever.

Oh, how I love dresses and dressing up! 😍 I'm so grateful that my sweet little family puts up with my dress obsession and takes photos of me wearing said obsessions whenever I ask them! Ha ha. 😆 My darling Gregor took these photos for me after I got home from church yesterday. I love how he snapped a bunch of pics while I was trying to keep my hair from blowing all over the place—it's fun to see behind the scenes! Thank you, Greg! 💙😘

Click on each photo for a crisper/clearer view.

Bye now! I hope you have a wonderful day! 👋😀

Just Say "NO!" to Mark Zuckerberg

Guess what?! I finally and thoroughly said "NO!" to Mark Zuckerberg! And just how did I say no to the all-powerful Zuck, you ask? Simply by deleting my Facebook account! 👏😃 I'm also leaving Instagram, but that process is taking longer to complete than it took for me to delete my Facebook account—more on that to come.

You might wonder why I suddenly decided to delete Facebook after all of these years, and leave my beloved Instagram. Well, it's because I read a lot of articles that share just how much Facebook and now Instagram have messed with our society. It's not good news! If you're interested, here are the articles I read that solidified my decision:

"Facebook Stored Millions Of User Passwords In Plain, Readable Text"

"Instagram Is the Internet’s New Home for Hate
As other social networks wage a very public war against misinformation, it's thriving on Instagram."

"Facebook’s Data Deals Are Under Criminal Investigation"

"Instagram posts encouraging eating disorders are 'spiralling out of control,' psychiatrists warn"

"Facebook won’t let you opt out of its phone number ‘look up’ setting"

"Facebook and Instagram Going Dark Should Be a Wake Up Call for Entrepreneurs

Social media is a tool you use. Your website and your email list are assets you own."

"Opinion: Facebook crumbles around its lonely king
Shareholders gave Mark Zuckerberg all the power, and now watch as top executives walk away from his iron-fisted rule"

"Why Facebook waited 3 months to disclose its latest privacy screw-up"

"I Deleted Facebook Last Year. Here’s What Changed (and What Didn’t).

Our personal tech columnist didn’t lose touch with his true friends — but strange things did occur, including Instagram thinking he was a woman."

Also, in late 2018, I watched Frontline's documentary, "The Facebook Dilemma," and it definitely had an influence on my #deleteFacebook! decision. I highly recommend watching Frontline's entire presentation! ⭐

What's crazy is that those articles are just a sampling of the negative press about Facebook! Instagram didn't used to have much bad press, but since it was bought by Facebook, I've seen IG in the press more and more and it's not good news. Oh, how I wish Instagram had never sold-out to Facebook! 👎 That said, let's continue with my story. 😊

On March 23rd, 2019, I logged back into Facebook for the first time in four years so I could finally delete my account once and for all! (I deactivated my account on March 9th, 2015.)

Let me tell you, logging back in to Fakebook was the strangest moment I've had in the past four years! It was so odd seeing very familiar parts of FB, but there were also new things I wasn't familiar with. I read the instructions as to how to download all of my data and permanently delete my Facebook account; it took me a while to figure everything out.

While I waited to get my Facebook account's data download, I looked at several people's pages that I hadn't had contact with since I left that blue and white world. I was surprised to see that a couple of my friends had new babies, and several friends had moved to new homes, but everything else in everyone else's lives pretty much fell in line with their posts from four+ years ago.

It was so interesting to note that all of my Facebook friends and family (that I don't have continuous/regular contact with) basically stayed the same—meaning, we are who we are! Good, bad, or indifferent, we fundamentally don't significantly change over the years! It really was such a fascinating "experiment" on my end! I'm actually really glad I was able to experience my own version of a "social scientist study" by being active on Facebook, then deactivating my account, and later going back on it for a couple of hours!

What surprised me the most about my adventure of logging back in to Facebook is how much time I spent there! 😬 I pulled up many pages of people I wanted to check up on, so that took time in and of itself. Yet I never could have predicted my many random clicks—i.e., my wonderings about other people who showed up on my friends/family members pages—and how long my "inquiries" took to resolve! 😆

I really "fell down" the Facebook Rabbit Hole and it was nothing close to a happy Wonderland! Ha ha. It was a stark reminder of how Facebook is/was not good for me—it's a HUGE time waster!

*Please let me clarify that the people I care about aren't a waste of time. It's just that the way Facebook is set up is meant to make us waste as much time on there as possible, which is not good for us. If you'd like concrete evidence of that fact, read this statement from New York Media's Intelligencer article, "Sean Parker: We Built Facebook to Exploit You": 

"Parker explained just how he and the other early Facebookers built the platform to 'consume as much of your time and conscious attention as possible.'"

Sean's statement makes me cringe and get a pit in my stomach! It's terrible what the Facebook machine has purposely and very knowingly done—and continues to do—to our society!

If you'd like to hear more from Sean Parker's interview, watch this video that also includes an interview with Chamath Palihapitiya, an early senior executive at Facebook

Sean Parker, Chamath Palihapitiya - Facebook is 'Ripping Apart Society'

*As a warning, be aware that Chamath uses strong language—i.e., swear/cuss words which I can't stand!

When it came down to actually deleting my Facebook account, I double checked everything very carefully. I made sure I had all of my data because those posts/messages/comments were important memories from my family's history! 💖 Once I was certain that my data download was complete, I clicked the blue box that said "⚠ Delete Account"! It was such an amazing feeling to click that button, you have no idea! Wow, talk about an adrenaline rush! 👏😃

Okay, that might seem like a strange reaction to have, but knowing I still had a Facebook account—even though it was deactivated—was always in the back of my mind, and it bothered me! I felt like a hypocrite because I so did not support Facebook and all of the problems it's introduced into our society, yet I still owned my deactivated account! 😬 By continuing to have a deactivated Facebook account, I wasn't living congruently to my soul. Thus I was so very happy to rectify my incongruous situation by finally deleting my Facebook account! Yay yay happy day! 😁

*In my estimation, my previous Facebook account has now been deleted from our universe for two-and-a-half weeks! Woohoo! 👊

Deciding to also delete my private Instagram account was a bit more difficult for me. I absolutely loved my time on Instagram over the past five years—I joined on February 26th, 2014—and I knew I'd deeply miss it. 😥 Yet after reading all of the articles I listed above, and knowing how Instagram has fundamentally changed for the worse since Facebook gained control, I knew what I had to do.

When I downloaded my private Instagram account's data, I was extremely disappointed to find that Instagram doesn't put your photos and captions in the same files! In fact, I couldn't even find all of my photo captions! They seemed to be hidden away deep within my data download, and the only way I could access them was to download my captions' file folder contents to a sketchy online program that converted them into an Excel spreadsheet which I then had to re-download.

I later discovered that that online conversion program downloaded a tracking virus to my computer, too. Boo! 😠 Thankfully, I eradicated the virus from my computer. But even when the sketchy online conversion program separated out my captions into the Excel spreadsheet, some of my captions were still missing—which ticked me off!

After all of the time and effort I spent downloading my Instagram world, I realized that this manipulation of our data is yet another devious Facebook tactic meant to keep its users hooked and brainwashed every day! But I will not fall for it! No, I will not! #feistyAdrie 😇

Thus, as much as I was so giddy to also delete my private Instagram account right away, it will have to wait for a future day hopefully not too far away. For now, I need to work on copying/pasting all of my photo captions into a Word document. Unfortunately, my captions won't match up exactly with my photo files as Instagram's data download just groups them by month 😞, but at least I'll have them!

Greg suggested that I create a private blog to post our photos and captions there, but that would take up entirely too much of my time as I have 950 private Instagram posts and multiple photos on many of them! So yeah, at this point, I'd rather have a journal-type document and keep it in the same computer file as my Instagram photos. It's not a perfect system, but it's better than not having my captions at all!

You see, I absolutely loved writing photo captions on my Instagram posts! It really helped me remember all of the wonderfulness or frustration of each day or experience that I posted about. Plus, I just love love love words!!! #EnthusiasticFantastic! 😁 So yes, a big part of the reason I loved contributing on Instagram was because of the wordy details I shared there. I love composing captions! 💛

And yes, I fully know that blogging is the best way to share large amounts of words, which is why I'm currently in the process of retraining my brain to come blog at my computer rather than composing and posting via my smart phone. It's been a long process to eradicate the "addictiveness" of Instagram from my daily life, but I'm totally getting there! I am making progress in my Instagram-free efforts! Yay! A fabulous quote I heard last night (while listening to a wonderful BYU Devotional, "Wrestling with Comparisons" by J.B. Haws—go listen to it right now! 😀) really helps me solidify that writing on my blog is one of the best things I can do:

"Writing makes an exact man."
– Francis Bacon

I absolutely love that quote and couldn't agree more! Yes, writing makes me an exact woman! #choosetowrite! 😁

Here are some of my Instagram side notes: my final post was on April 3rd, 2019; I completely deleted the app from my phone; I no longer scroll my feed; and copying/pasting my many photo captions into a Word doc will be one of my summertime projects of 2019!

Guess what else?! I have even more information to share about why we should just say "NO!" to Mark Zuckerberg and get off all of the social media platforms Facebook controls. Are you ready for this?! 😃

A little while after I started my Facebook account deletion process, I saw this incredible new TED Talk given by Carole Cadwalladr at TED's April, 2019 conference—it's an absolute must-watch!

"Facebook's role in Brexit — and the threat to democracy"

Around that same time, I stumbled upon this article that deeply disturbed me 😧:

"Inside the Secret Facebook War For Mormon Hearts and Minds"

Here is the gist about what one former member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints did to his family members and friends, and the other people whose family/friends signed up for his "services" online via personalized Facebook ads—it's utterly appalling to me! I just can't believe that Facebook allows such blatant targeting of its users!

"...The project was called MormonAds, and it was a brief but perhaps unprecedented experiment in targeted religious dissuasion. In four months at the end of 2017, the project targeted more than 5,000 practicing Mormons with messages painstakingly crafted to serve as gentle introductions to the messier elements of LDS history that were glossed over within the church. All the names and email addresses for the campaign came from disillusioned ex-Mormons.

"...Jones had a working knowledge of Facebook's ads tool through his business, and he knew that he could precision target an ad to a custom audience as small as 20 people. All he needed were their email addresses. 'If I target my family with ads, then I’m not the apostate messenger,' he said. 'Maybe they’ll look at it or read it. If they knew what I knew about Mormon history, they’d understand why I left the church.'"

Based on that article alone, it's clear that Facebook is not safe for any of us! Facebook is not our friend in any way, shape, or form! We should run as far and as fast as we can away from Facebook's creepy alternate universe!

All of the information I've shared in this post would have easily been enough, but yesterday morning, I was introduced to two additional, shocking articles that further support my stance that we should all delete our Facebook and Instagram accounts immediately! I highly recommend reading both of them as they will blow your mind! 💣💥 I hope they will convince you to strongly say "NO!" to Mark Zuckerberg, too! #justdoit! #justsayNO!

The New York Times

Opinion

"It's Time to Break Up Facebook"

The Verge

"THE TRAUMA FLOOR

The secret lives of Facebook moderators in America"

If we want anything to change within our social media atmosphere, we must band together and stand up for what is right and true! You might think I'm overreacting, but I know I'm not. The future of our society for generations to come depends on what we all do right now! We cannot wait for some government to change our social media climate! Only we can make that positive change that needs to be made!

With every bit of seriousness I can muster, please understand that (from everything I've read, watched, and listened to) Mark Zuckerberg certainly will NOT be the positive and righteous change agent for our world. No, Zuck is fully looking to keep his world domination and has zero intentions of ever stepping down from his data-driven, citizen-powered throne! Furthermore, the many Facebook executives and employees won't step up and make the necessary changes either because they're all enjoying their vast amounts of money entirely too much—money that they've all made from us wasting our precious time on their addictive and destructive apps!

So, you might be wondering where I will go in our social media universe, as there aren't too many options outside of Facebook's empire. It's true, I'm definitely not going to give up social media all together just because of a few really bad apples in the basket. Thus, after doing a lot of research, I decided to join Flickr! Yay Flickr! 😀

I really like that Flickr was sold by Yahoo in 2018 to a conscientious, family-owned company named SmugMug. Based on what I've researched, Flickr is now all about its users': photographs; experience on Flickr; connection with people they want to be connected to; and privacy!

I also love the fact that I can pay for Flickr Pro(!) and get the following, "Unlimited storage, ad-free browsing, advanced stats, and more." I am so interested in unlimited storage, and especially in an advertisement-free(!) Flickr experience! Yes, I am totally willing to pay a small fee for social media freedom from constant advertisements and insane invasions of my privacy!

If you're interested, here's more information about the Flickr/SmugMug partnership:

SmugMug + Flickr Frequently Asked Questions

About Flickr

Flickr Help

Flickr FAQs

*In case you're wondering, no, I have not been asked to promote Flickr in any way. I've not been contacted by Flickr to sign up, share my thoughts, nor anything close to that. I'm simply sharing my opinion on what I think is currently the best replacement for Instagram and Facebook.

The only problem is, I can't get any of my friends to sign up on Flickr with me because they're all so in love with Instagram and Facebook! (They're probably also "addicted" to IG and FB to some extent.) #sosadface! 😢 My dearest mom and sweet auntie have both signed up on Flickr (Thank you, darling ladies!) and we're now following each other, but we're it! Oh, how I would love it if my other family members and friends joined me on Flickr!

Here are my stats for my other social media accounts:

I don't plan to ever quit Twitter unless something really crazy happens in the future. I haven't used Twitter a lot yet, as I've been super busy lately, but that awesome time will come in the future where I'll be sharing my blog post links to Twitter on a regular basis! Yay yay happy Twitter days! 😄 I've researched Twitter's CEO, Jack Dorsey, and while he seems a little extreme in some of his personal views and habits, I feel much better about him and his leadership capabilities than I ever did about Mark Zuckerberg. Maybe I'll just refer to Jack as being a little eccentric...as we all are in our own ways! 😉

I will totally keep my Pinterest and LinkedIn accounts, too. I share my blog post links on Pinterest, but I also love posting the many additional articles, videos, and podcasts I feel are worth sharing and referring back to. I'm not super active on LinkedIn, but I absolutely understand the tremendous value of being a member on LinkedIn! It is a great networking tool!

And of course, I will continue sharing here on Enthusiastic Fantastic! It is and will remain my main internet and social media love forever! 😄 Unless something catastrophic happens to me or the world wide web, I will always keep posting here!

Finally, I understand that many of you will choose to stay connected via Facebook and Instagram indefinitely, which is totally your right and privilege. I won't hold your choices against you—I promise! 😘 We are all so blessed to have the God-given gift of free agency! Each of us gets to choose how we live our marvelous miraculous lives and spend our precious beautiful days. 💗 But we are also subject to the consequences of our many actions—be they good, bad, or boring. 😉 Thus, we must be satisfied with the choices we make, for it is terrible to be filled with regret! Yes, I'm so happy that I choose to live my life free of regrets every day!

My sincere hope is that each of us as individuals, and our society as a whole, will wake up to this mess Mark Zuckerberg has created and be the positive change that makes our world a better place for everyone!

Have a great day making your best choices! 😘

Strengthening Our Families

Hi, everyone! This morning, I was getting ready to compose an Instagram post on my private account. As I was downloading photos and screenshots to create a visually interesting post, I realized that I needed this post to be public, and that Instagram couldn't really hold all of the wonderfulness that I've found.

Plus, I'm super wordy and I struggle with editing my Instagram posts to be the length allowed on that platform. #wordyAdrie! 😄 Sometimes, I've spent way too much time figuring out what words/sentences to omit on Instagram, when I really should have just written a blog post to begin with! Thus, today I'm breaking my time-consuming Instagram-posting habit and writing a time-consuming-but-much-more-fulfilling blog post instead! Ha ha. Yay me!

If you didn't know, I'm right smack dab in the middle of raising teenagers! What's amazing to me about this season of life is that when you're pregnant, or just had a baby, no doctor or nurse or parenting book fully prepares you for teenagers and all that comes with them! 😅 Even though I took a complete Love and Logic parenting class in Colorado when my firstborn was (I think) seven years old, it still didn't prepare me for these wild teenage years!

Yes, we parents were all teenagers once, but being a teen and raising teens are two very different things! I certainly remember being a teenager and all that entails, but I could go on for days about how surprising it's been to parent my teenagers! It's nearly unbelievable how quickly teen emotions change—my view of my family can go from being "Everything is easy-peasy, super awesome!" to "I'm so tired! How am I going to make it through one more day of teenagedom without crying my eyes out?!" in nearly an instant!

The good news is, all things considered, my sweet little family is doing well!

My oldest son just graduated from high school and I'm sooo happy for him! It was a definite struggle at some points of his high school journey, but we all hung in there and he was successful in his efforts! 🎓👏😁 That said, I will not miss those seemingly never-ending high school nights when he refused to go to bed at a decent hour. If I didn't know what I know about teenagers and their sleep cycles, I would have been a complete wreck!

Thankfully, I know it's not just my teenagers who don't want to go to sleep at night, but a scientifically proven problem for teens the world over. The National Sleep Foundation points out that, "Biological sleep patterns shift toward later times for both sleeping and waking during adolescence—meaning it is natural to not be able to fall asleep before 11:00 pm." Amen to that statement! And yet I wonder why on earth it is that high school is still held at such an early hour! We seriously need to make every high school's start time later in the morning!

Sleep aside, my teenagers are doing really well for being teenagers. 😊 I am so grateful for the incredible human beings I've been given and entrusted to raise. My heart is completely filled with love for my growing babies! 💖 That said, I am constantly looking for ways to help my children feel happier, do better, and be the best version of themselves—without me becoming an annoying dictator in the process! Ha ha.

I know that being a good parent starts with me and my positive attitude. That said, even though I'm technically and legally responsible for my darling children and their well-being until the age of 18, in the end, they each need to live their own lives and be in charge of themselves. They need to make their choices and own them—I so hope they make good ones! In the end, I'm only able to regulate/manage/change myself! And that's how it is for every person on this planet!

So, as much as I dearly want to help my children every minute of every day of their precious lives, I can only help them to the point that they want me to help. Yes, parenting teenagers is a delicate tightrope-walk that takes loads of careful practice, purposeful dedication, laser-sharp focus, and enthusiastic perseverance! Not to mention, an endless supply of unconditional love, great self confidence, and lots of "strength training"!

But seriously, parents of teenagers need to have good support systems and excellent self-care measures in place to feel successful in their callings. I would not do as well as I do in parenting my teenagers without my coping strategies—for example: having a wonderful marriage; exercising five to six days per week; getting enough sleep; eating healthily; having good friends/family members to talk with; and especially my spiritual connection to Heaven.

Speaking of prayer, it's my go-to best parenting technique for raising teenagers! I literally can't tell you how many times I've prayed for my teens because I'm always praying for them! 💗 I know our Heavenly Father knows my children much better than I do, and I know He actually sees what their future holds—unlike me who just thinks I know what's best for my children. Thus, my prayers are always first and foremost in my parenting strategies. I have experienced miracles through prayer and fasting for my children! I will continue praying for my children every day for the rest of my life and into eternity!

As I said before, I'm always seeking out ways to be a better mother. I've shared many helpful motherhood/parenting articles, talks, and videos on my Pinterest account, and I'll continue sharing what I find there, but I've definitely not had the time to pin everything yet. I seriously wish Heavenly Father would give us three additional hours every day! A 27-hour day sounds pretty great to me! So, for today, I'll share here the things I've recently found to be helpful in my efforts of parenting my cherished teenagers:

"To Women: 'Doing Better Doesn’t Mean Doing More'"
By Sharon Eubank and Reyna Aburto—blog post on LDS.org.

I love the entire blog post, but this paragraph really stood out to me:

"As we seek the Lord’s will and strive to do it, we are assured that every small effort is accepted. All the Lord asks of us is a heart full of love and willingness to share that love. We’ve all made covenants to “mourn with those that mourn … and comfort those that stand in need of comfort” (Mosiah 18:9), but that doesn’t mean to run ourselves ragged. Doing better doesn’t always mean doing more. And if you do just one inspired thing each day, you are nevertheless the Lord’s agent."

Amen, sista, and bravo! 👏😁

"Love One Another, As I Have Loved You"
By Jennifer Brinkerhoff Platt—talk presented at BYU Women's Conference, 2018.

I'm so excited Jennifer's talk is available to read and watch! I've listened to her video at least three times already, and I'll be listening to/watching/reading it again very soon! Here are three sections of her talk that I absolutely love!

"...if we really understand the distinction between doctrine, principles and application, then we will work to focus more on the doctrine—the WHY of our behaviors. Focusing on application or HOW we live is divisive, because I shouldn’t judge you for what the Holy Ghost is telling you to do. I may not understand your approach, but if we are one in doctrine, in the WHY, then it doesn’t matter how we pursue it."

"Continually pointing ourselves to the doctrine helps us to be one in Christ as He is one with the Father. Think of the love we extend to each other when instead of judging HOW another person is living, we assume the very best, that they are pursuing doctrine. Look for and trust the WHY of other’s behaviors. Teach and testify of WHY we do what we do. This gives us entrance into the sacred spaces of one another’s hearts where there is hidden sorrow that the eye can’t see. We also learn to pursue our questions differently and find peace with the ambiguity associated with mortality."

"Now, do you recognize this statement from President Boyd K. Packer? 

'True doctrine, understood, changes attitudes and behaviors. The study of the doctrines of the gospel will improve behavior quicker than a study of behavior will improve behavior. Preoccupation with unworthy behavior can lead to unworthy behavior. That is why we stress so forcefully the study of the doctrines of the gospel.'"

So awesome, right?! 😀

"How great leaders inspire action"
By Simon Sinek—TEDxPuget Sound

It might seem strange to relate this TED Talk to parenting, but it really clicked with me! I've simply applied what he said to parenting and children! 😊 Here's a great quote from Mr. Sinek's wise words:

"Every single person, every single organization on the planet knows what they do, 100 percent. Some know how they do it, ... But very, very few people or organizations know why they do what they do. And by 'why' I don't mean 'to make a profit.' That's a result. It's always a result. By 'why,' I mean: What's your purpose? What's your cause? What's your belief? Why does your organization exist? Why do you get out of bed in the morning? And why should anyone care? As a result, the way we think, we act, the way we communicate is from the outside in, it's obvious. We go from the clearest thing to the fuzziest thing. But the inspired leaders and the inspired organizations—regardless of their size, regardless of their industry—all think, act and communicate from the inside out."

I also really like Simon's second TED Talk: "Why good leaders make you feel safe," and applied what he teaches to parenting, as well! Here's one of my favorite quotes from his talk:

"Leadership is a choice. It is not a rank. I know many people at the senior[-]most levels of organizations who are absolutely not leaders. They are authorities, and we do what they say because they have authority over us, but we would not follow them. And I know many people who are at the bottoms of organizations who have no authority and they are absolutely leaders, and this is because they have chosen to look after the person to the left of them, and they have chosen to look after the person to the right of them. This is what a leader is."

"The Idea of 'Mothers in Zion' Made Me Mad—Until I Learned What It Meant"
By Sharon Eubank—blog post on LDS.org.

Oh, how I love her quote! 💛

"Charity, or the pure love of Christ, is motherhood in a very practical and real way—sacrificing so that others might thrive and seeing beyond present circumstances to the way things really are. This motherhood is part of my covenantal identity. My mother-work will come directly through the whispers of the Holy Spirit."

"Strengthening the Family: Resource Guide for Parents"
Published by The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints—also available for purchase at LDS.org's online store.

This is the gem of all parenting jewels! I'm so happy I found Strengthening the Family! I'll be reading and referring to it again and again! I only wish it had been available when I was pregnant with my first baby! It was published in 2006, two years after my last baby was born, but I never knew about it until recently. Thus, I'm sharing it with the world now in hopes that it helps some new parent somewhere in this glorious world of ours! While I feel silly that I had access to it all this time with the amazing Gospel Library app on my smartphone and didn't previously find it, I'm not going to worry because at least I'll be using it now!

Here are two great quotes from its pages:

"Words and behavior have the power to hurt or to help, to inflict pain and suffering or to soothe painful feelings, to provoke doubt and fear or to instill faith and courage." 

"President James E. Faust of the First Presidency taught the importance of love and of recognizing differences in children when disciplining them: 'Child rearing is so individualistic. Every child is different and unique. What works with one may not work with another. I do not know who is wise enough to say what discipline is too harsh or what is too lenient except the parents of the children themselves, who love them most. It is a matter of prayerful discernment for the parents. Certainly the overarching and undergirding principle is that the discipline of children must be motivated more by love than by punishment.'"

President Faust's quote can apply to every parenting issue under the sun because we parents know and love our children the most! We have the individual responsibility and joy of parenting our children in the best ways possible for each of them because they are "ours"! 💞

I'm so grateful for this gift of motherhood I've been given because it's everything to me! 🎁 When I say everything, I mean that I always wanted to be a mother{!}—from my earliest memories—and I'm so grateful my wish/desire has been so richly fulfilled! And I must give huge props to my darling Gregor for helping me achieve my dreams of motherhood!

While I know my time is short in terms of having my children live with me (and Greg 😍) before they move on into the wide wide world, I will always be a mother; I am eternally a mother, inside and out! Regardless of the outcome of my children's lives—whatever path they choose in this world—I will love and care for these amazing souls that our Heavenly Father has blessed me with forever! 😇

You've come to the end of my parenting thoughts/helps for now, but I'll share more as I discover them! I'd love it if something I've shared today is of value to you or someone you know! I sincerely hope we'll all work on strengthening our families because relationships with our loved ones are the most important! 💛

Blogging for Conflict Resolution

You might have noticed that I've put off blogging for quite a while. As I described in my previous post, I've been very busy. Yet at the same time, I've tried to analyze myself and figure out why I've not been blogging like I truly desire. I finally realized that I haven't made blogging a priority because I've been having some issues with my extended family. It's difficult to write that here on my blog—a wonderful public space I've created for myself, but it's true.

I've struggled mightily over the past several months due to feelings of frustration and sadness over a lack of closeness between myself and some extended family members—both in my family and Greg's family, but especially mine. And no matter how much time has gone by, or how many efforts of goodwill I've extended, those issues frustratingly remain to some degree, or another.

I've been greatly misjudged on many levels, which tears at my soul! So many times I've found myself tearing up saying, "I can't believe they honestly thought that way about me! I can't believe they didn't think to ask me about the real story! I can't believe they wouldn't call to talk to me in person instead of jumping to such conclusions based on hearsay! —because we all know what gossip and judging without actually talking with the person you've been offended by does.

I'm such a happy person—it's true! 😀 I live my life very well—exactly how I desire! 😁 So when you love people as much as I do and some of the very important people in your life misjudge you and put you into a category that you don't belong, well, it feels horrible. Of course, I'm the type who will happily keep going about my life, day in and day out, without letting someone curb my enthusiasm, but that doesn't mean their actions don't affect me—especially when I care deeply about said souls!

I won't go into the nitty-gritty details because there's no point. Suffice it to say, my heart has squeezed with sadness more than once over the past several months. Forgiveness has taken on an entirely new meaning to me! I've forgiven everyone, but I don't know and can't tell if they've forgiven me, or not—which is a struggle to my soul that I consciously and continually push away. I keep striving my best every day to say and do the Christlike right things, but that doesn't mean my heart doesn't still twinge with tears.

I don't know if any of you have experienced anything like this before (and I'm sorry I'm not being more specific), but, to me, it feels like no matter what I say or do (or said or did), those select extended family members have placed me in the new classification of "other," or "no longer welcome," which feels terrible—and it seems as if there's no way for me to be reclassified! 😞

So. What I've been trying to do is learn from these torturous feelings. I've tried valiantly to see where other people are coming from—even if their actions/words don't make sense to me. And, I've let my extended family members "go," to the extent possible—which is unbelievably hard for me, but I let go because I love them.

I'm hoping that by finally writing about my issues here, I will feel better and be able to move on. I love writing so much(!)—it works wonders for my soul! Thus, it's been difficult when I've felt that I can't speak of my situation (my truth!) here on Enthusiastic Fantastic because someone might misinterpret my words—which is why I stayed away from blogging for such a long time in the first place. But that ends right now with my version of conflict resolution—or, what I like to call "Blogging for Conflict Resolution"!  I think it should be the hip new call to action, don't you?! Ha ha. 😃

Now I'm going to share what I'm thankful for...and just know that these thoughts relate somehow to the situations I described previously—meaning the lack of those actions, too. Did any of that make sense?! 😄

In no particular order, I'm truly thankful for:

• genuine smiles
• looking me in the eye
• happy hugs
• questions asked in a kind and truthful manner
• "likes" 💖 and comments on my Instagram posts
• continuing to follow my Instagram accounts (I absolutely love my Instagram world I've created!)
• responding to texts and emails I've sent
• giving me the benefit of the doubt
• not jumping to conclusions
• talking to me directly instead of gossiping about me
• loving me and liking me 😊 (you know, because families must love each other even if they don't like each other very much)
• desiring to understand where I'm coming from
• sharing time and energy with me
• having a willingness to listen to what I have to say
• valuing my thoughts and opinions
• acknowledging that I have something to contribute
• respecting my differing opinions
• recognizing boundaries and not overstepping
• staying connected to me even though we see things differently
• sharing your world with me even though it looks vastly different from mine
• not being jealous of my happy life
• recognizing that I consistently work very hard to have my wonderful life
• acknowledging that my happy, wonderful life isn't easy—unlike others who have misjudged it as such
• being genuinely happy for the amazing and endlessly-loving eternal marriage that Greg and I have created together
• appreciating my sincere endeavors to make this world a better place without labeling me as a "show off," or a "bragger"
• accepting my true friendship efforts with the intent they were offered
• letting go of any resentment or anger directed towards me

Now I'd like to share some lovely quotes I've really appreciated over the past few weeks—they've helped me tremendously!

Remember: "Despite how open, peaceful, and loving you attempt to be, people can only meet you as deeply as they've met themselves." – Matt Kahn 

That genius quote deserved a typographic design of its very own! I really enjoyed creating this one! 🌲

"Being positive in a negative situation is not naive, it's leadership." – Ralph Marston 

"There's a common denominator in our human experience... Everybody wants to know: Did you hear me, and did what I say matter?" – Oprah Winfrey

With that, please enjoy these inspiring lyrics from "I'll Begin Again," by Leslie Bricusse, in the movie musical Scrooge. Yes, I'm totally applying these wonderful thoughts to myself, but I truly believe they should live in all of our hearts every day of our lives! 😇

I'll begin again
I will build my life
I will live to know
That I fulfilled my life
I'll begin today
Throw away the past
And the future I build
Will be something that will last  

I will take the time
I have left to live
And I will give it all
That I have left to give
I will live my days
For my fellow men
And I'll live in praise
Of that moment when
I was able to begin again  

I will start anew
I will make amends
And I'll make quite certain
That the story ends
On a note of hope
On a strong amen
And I'll thank the world
And remember when
I was able to begin again

I absolutely love this inspired version by the Mormon Tabernacle Choir!

Lastly, I know this is not one of my most enthusiastic fantastic posts, but it's where I've been for quite a long time, and I felt the need to share. So, thank you for making it this far with me! Your reading efforts are greatly appreciated! I hope you have a wonderful day! 💙💛

I Love Dresses and Skirts!

If you've ever looked at my public Instagram account, you already know how much I love dressing up—especially in modest dresses and skirts! Yet modest fashion hasn't always been what it is now.

I remember when I was a teenager, it was difficult to find modest dresses and skirts that were also cute and stylish. Thankfully, our modest fashion world has improved dramatically, and I'm ridiculously happy about that fact! :)

The fashion industry, in general, has become so much more open to every type of style, so people don't stick out like a sore thumb anymore if they wear modest clothing. I'm so grateful to all of those wonderfully artistic clothing designers who imagine such beautiful and modest pieces for women of all ages!

Obviously, I love wearing dresses and skirts to church and special occasions the most! But I definitely don't need a special occasion to wear my dressy-best! I try to wear my lovely dresses and skirts as often as possible. :)

Yet sometimes in my daily stay-at-home-mom life, dresses and skirts aren't always the easiest choice for all the housework, organizing and running around that I do. There are many days when only skinny jeans or stretchy exercise pants will do! :)

The only problem with modest fashion I've run into is not having enough money to purchase all of the amazing clothing I love! Ha ha. :)

But in all seriousness, there is one teeny little problem with modest-dress fashion that exists within my beloved church's social structure: judging. Because my church has scripture verses that include thoughts about not "being lifted up in pride" and not "wearing costly apparel"—i.e., we're not being as humble as we could and should—some people find it their unfortunate business to judge what others choose to wear to church.

It's interesting because, over my 19+ years of marriage, and my family's many moves (11), I've seen two ways that Church members view church clothing: 1. The nicer and fancier the better, in order to show ultimate respect for the Lord when going to church. They believe we should wear our very best clothing for Him. In other words, we wear our best clothing when we go to the best places. (I fall into this category.) 2. We shouldn't wear costly (i.e., fancy/high-fashion) apparel because we're not being truly humble enough if we do so. We should put our extra money to better use by helping others. There might be other ideas about church clothing, but those are the two veins of thought I'll be focusing on for this post.

In regard to those different ways of fashion thinking, I've come up with the following:

• We shouldn't spend more money than we can absolutely afford for appropriate church clothing.
• It's most definitely not our business to judge what anyone else wears to church, or how much it cost.
• The term "costly apparel" can mean something totally different to different people with different budgets. One woman's $40 dress is another woman's $400 is another woman's $4,000 dress.
• I love the idea of showing respect for our Heavenly Father, our Savior, Jesus Christ, and our congregation by wearing our very best clothing to church and the temple.
• We honor the bodies we've been given (by our Heavenly Father) by dressing well and taking good care of ourselves—physically, mentally and spiritually.
• We create a world of loveliness and possibly inspire others when we dress up. That idea might sound absurd to some, but I believe everyone honestly appreciates beauty! :) And I love remembering how classy everyone looked and acted back in the old days—before the 1960s came along. *By the way, I found a most-interesting article about how our clothing style as a society has changed. "Why and When Did Americans Begin To Dress So Casually?" is a great read!
• When we dress well, we subconsciously want to behave better. That might sound too basic to some people, but I believe it's true.
• Clothing shouldn't be the main focus of our church-going experiences. You might laugh at that, but I've seen a few women more interested in their fellow ward members' latest fashion statements than the sacrament.
• We can positively contribute to our economy by buying nice clothing—for church, or otherwise. Think of all the people who share and strengthen their talents by creating beautiful clothing! Think of all the families we support when we buy their amazing clothing creations! :)
• We can donate older clothing to charity that we don't wear anymore. This helpful habit benefits both the giver (less stuff) and receiver (beautifully clothed)! :)
• Dressing nicely isn't bragging, even though some people view it that way. Many people genuinely want to look their best for church—it has nothing to do with showing-off or being prideful.
• It's always better to be over-dressed than under-dressed! :)

As you can tell, I feel strongly that dressing our best makes such a positive statement and can only benefit us! :)

Finally, here are my favorite fabulous quotes I found about dressing well. I wholeheartedly agree with and love them all! :)

"Looking good isn't self-importance, it's self-respect."
– Charles Hix

"Elegance is not standing out, but being remembered."
– Giorgio Armani

"If you look good, you feel good, and if you feel good, you do good." – Georges St-Pierre

"People will stare. Make it worth their while."
– Harry Winston

"You can never be overdressed or overeducated."
– Oscar Wilde

Stay tuned for my modest fashion companies reviews—photos included! I can't wait to share!! 😊

P.S. As you can see from my previous sentence, I just realized that Blogger added "insert special characters" to its functionality! I'm so excited for smiley-face emojis! 😍

My Pioneer Trek Sacrament Meeting Talk

(This is my first post in My Fankle Journey.)

Today I spoke in sacrament meeting about my experiences during my stake's Youth Pioneer Trek. My original talk was way too long—imagine that!—so, I crossed out several sentences as I waited for our meeting to begin. I think my talk was still probably too long, but it is what it is. #iamwordiness! ;) My blog, on the other hand, has no time limit (Yay!), so I'm super excited to be sharing my full talk here! That said, I edited it a smidgen for privacy.

Before we begin, let me share a few things... Greg and I were assigned to be the lead ma and pa for our ward. Initially, we thought we'd be the only "parents" on trek for 30 youth, but after attending our first stake trek meeting, it was decided that our ward needed another ma and pa. I'm so grateful we were able to divide/share our responsibilities with another couple because preparing for trek was a lot of work—they were essential to our success! :) Our ward ended up having 29 Youth go on trek. We missed several wonderful souls, but are so grateful for those Youth who did come with us! :)

After focusing intensely on trek for nearly three months (one of the reasons my blog has been so quiet), it's a little strange to know I'm actually done with my trek responsibilities. Yes, with the singing of our trek song, The Fire of the Covenant, and giving my talk in sacrament meeting today, I've officially completed my trek service! :) I'm not complaining, it just feels really good to finally be finished! While I'm so grateful for the entire experience of trek, and I'll remember it forever, trek wore me out! I'm extremely tired from the effort we put forth and I can't wait to actually have some moments to myself and my family!

Okay, here's my talk! 

Good morning! The topic I've been assigned is, "What I Learned About Myself and Our Pioneer Ancestors: Notes from Trek."

A situation I recently experienced ended up playing a big role in my trek journey. I titled my situation, "Fankle," which stands for fat ankle. Fankle became a challenge for me after I badly sprained my ankle on an extended family vacation in Midway three weeks before trek.

The day Fankle became part of my life, my world felt utterly perfect—that's not an exaggeration! I began the day working out with my little sister, we had such a great time together! Those who know me, know I love exercising in every form. Working out makes me happy!

Later that beautiful afternoon, my family and I went swimming. I discovered that the outdoor three-foot kiddie pool was the perfect place to practice my straddle-up handstands! It took a few falls, but I soon became the kiddie-pool handstand expert! In that sunshine-filled moment, I became 15-years-old again and had the gymnastic skills to prove it! Throughout that day, I was blissfully happy, surrounded by the people I love most. As my boys would say, it was a 10 out of 10!

I share that happiness to illustrate how hard it's been for me to be physically sidelined for so many weeks. Fankle is not my favorite. Yet I know Heavenly Father allowed me to have that most perfect of days to buoy me up for what was to come...

After my physically active day, one would think that I would have been satisfied to stay in our condo and relax with my family playing Monopoly. But when my brother-in-law said many of our extended family members were meeting in the parking lot to longboard, the Spirit told me I needed to participate, so I went. I've learned through many amazing experiences in my life that when the Holy Ghost speaks to me, I listen. Thus, a mere 45 minutes later, disbelief clouded my heart and tears filled my eyes as I sat on the sidewalk with my new friend, Fankle.

My ankle pain and swelling was intense, but the shock at what had occurred was unbearable. In the moments I sat waiting for my extended family members to discover me, I cried inside thinking, "I can't workout anymore!" But an even bigger worry immediately crept in: "What on earth am I going to do on trek?!" Thankfully, the x-rays assured me I didn't have any broken bones—but my level two sprain ensured that I'd be a gimp for the next four to six weeks. What the medical professionals didn't explain is the pain a sprained ankle causes...it hurt a lot!

One blessing I received from Fankle was that I had a lot of time to sit at my computer. In preparation for trek, I endlessly researched and read about many of my pioneer ancestors. On Family Search's Mormon Pioneer page, I found 29 of my direct ancestors who crossed the plains! In recent years, I'd read about two of my prominent LDS ancestors—John Solomon Fullmer and Thomas Grover. Their lives are intermixed with Joseph Smith, and our family feels blessed to have that early Church connection.

Yet as I looked over my pioneer ancestor names, one in particular stood out to me: Sarah Ann Harris. I clicked on Sarah's name but was disappointed not to find any information about her pioneer trek. I looked at her family tree and saw that she had 14 siblings! I decided to click on her parents' information, for I knew there was a story there!

Little did I know when I researched my fourth great grandparents—Robert Harris Jr. and Hannah Maria (pronounced Mar-eye-ah) Eagles—that I would find deep family ties to my favorite city! They were even one of the stories presented in our Youth's pioneer night a few weeks before trek!

In that moment, I humbly realized that my fourth great grandparents wanted me to find them. You see, Robert and Maria weren't listed on my initial pioneer page. If I hadn't been listening to the Holy Ghost who told me to click on Sarah's name, and then her parents' names, I never would have known about my connection! After learning about the Harrises, I concluded they had an incredible love story—one worthy of a historical novel and movie! And late last night, I discovered that a distant cousin of mine has written a trio of historical novels based on their lives! I love it when I'm right! I can't wait to read his books!

Yet I was stunned to realize that one of the two General Conference talks I was given to help me prepare for today includes Robert and Hannah Maria Harris' story! Yes, in General Conference, April, 2014, Elder William R. Walker spoke specifically about our great grandparents! I find it fascinating that out of the many General Conference talks about pioneers, our bishopric chose the talk about my fourth great grandparents—just for me! Yeah, that's not a coincidence. The Harrises wanted me to know them and learn from their legacy. :)

I was also delighted at what I learned from my other pioneer ancestors:

From my fourth great grandmother, Susanah Shuker Clark, I learned that wicked stepmothers indeed exist. 11-year-old Susanah was forced by her stepmother to cross the plains while carrying her very large, one-year-old half-brother the entire way. Her stepmother always said, "You go on ahead, Susanah, I'll catch up..." but she never did. I can't imagine a grown woman allowing a child to take on her responsibility in that exhausting way, yet Susanah remained strong and completed her trek!

After settling in Utah, Susanah's stepmother wouldn't allow her to wash her clothes at their house and forced Susanah to wash them at her older married sister's house. Susanah's family was so poor, she attended only one party during her entire growing-up years—I find that to be a tragedy! ;) When Susanah was ready for marriage, her father gave her the tops of his boots to make her wedding shoes. Susanah wore that same pair of shoes for an entire year! Yet during our stake trek, I heard stories of pioneer women who wore rags on their feet instead of shoes—which means my Susanah was pretty blessed.

Before trek, I was feeling picked-on that I had only a few pair of flip-flops to wear with my Fankle brace. I wondered if I should go buy more flip-flops because the pairs I had weren't dressy enough for church. In that moment, I said to myself, "Adrie! If Susanah Clark can wear one pair of shoes for an entire year, you can certainly rotate between your three pairs of flip-flops for the next four weeks—you'll survive!" :) As a side note, the photo of my fourth great grandparents—Susanah and David King—is gorgeous. They look like they stepped right out of a classic 1800s movie! I had fun imagining their love story!

What I learned from my fourth great grandfather, James Frederick Bunn, is that the parent-child relationship hasn't changed much in 101 years. James' journals are filled with daily facts, but the sentences that made me laugh included things like what time James woke up his children, versus when they actually got up and began working. He shared that his children left in the morning to go do something, but didn't come home for hours. Over and over, James frustratingly wrote about the fact that his children didn't complete the tasks he gave him. His daughter Elsie, sounded like quite the little socialite, and James was bothered that Elsie didn't care that she left her mother to work alone. That said, I'd like to point out that my third great grandmother, Minette, was never mentioned negatively in James' journal entries! ;)

Jane Comish Ashton, my fourth great grandmother, taught me that you can remain strong—both physically and spiritually—no matter what happens. Jane was asked to leave the beautiful Isle of Man (the island between Great Britain and Ireland), sail to America, and work with her father for two years to save money so they could bring the rest of their family members over. While their family was living in Missouri, Jane's youngest brother died. In their family history, it said that losing 8-year-old Joseph was the most difficult thing they had endured up to that point. Jane married Robert, a widower with one daughter, and they trekked to Utah shortly after their marriage. Joseph's death prepared Jane to later lose six of her eight sweet children: three died before the age of two; the other three passed away in their early 20s. I truly can’t imagine the pain Jane endured in losing her most precious children! Despite such tremendous losses, Jane and Robert remained dedicated to their faith for the rest of their lives.

Thanks to Fankle, I had additional time to discover the prominent people I'm related to. According to BYU's Relative Finder—another feature of Family Search, I'm related to many notable Latter-day Saints, celebrities, US Presidents, and European royalty! I was really excited to find out that my second-cousin-once-removed is Elder Gary E. Stevenson! More of my extended cousins include: Steve Young; Henry Samson—who sailed on the Mayflower; a few souls from the Salem witch trials; Lucille Ball; Humphrey Bogart; Henry Fonda; Jimmy Stewart; and Barack Obama.

Now let's move on to trek.

One of our stake leaders' assignments was for each Youth to find one of their pioneer ancestors to trek for and learn their story. While I didn't read every Youth's pioneer ancestor story—because our ward had two trek families, I read quite a few of them and loved what I learned! This ward has wonderful pioneer ancestors! But that doesn't surprise me because all of you are wonderful, too!

For my family's trekking assignments, my oldest son trekked for Robert Harris, Jr.; my daughter trekked for Jane Comish Ashton; Greg trekked for his third great grandfather, Jacob Foutz, Jr.; and I trekked for my little sister, Mackenzie, who died when she was 18-and-a-half years old. I wanted to trek for my youngest sister because she was never able to go on trek. When I prayed about trekking for Mackenzie, I felt strongly that I made the right decision! :)

Being on trek reiterated to me the need for all of us to work together in unity in whatever situation we find ourselves. I loved watching our trek family members working hard for each other! I love how our stake members endlessly served each other! Even though we were tired, I saw smiles upon smiles! The happiness of our Youth was contagious! I also greatly enjoyed our fascinating conversations with each other. We had such fun together! Well, at least I did! :) Because of trek, I saw a social rejuvenation in our Youth that is priceless! Yes, the pioneers' socialization model produced maximum benefits for our tech-savvy Youth!

There were several times when other wards in our stake weren't trekking as quickly as the mighty youth of our ward, and we had to come to an abrupt halt. There were times—because of my painful Fankle—when I wasn't trekking as quickly as our ward's Youth probably would have liked. Sometimes, our entire stake stopped trekking for a few minutes so leaders could care for a sick or injured trekker. In order for our stake to stay healthy and happy, we stopped a lot for water and bathroom breaks. At times, it seemed to take quite a while for us to be ready to move forward again.

There were also two instances during trek when satan made his presence known to our stake. I won't go into details, but those short experiences reminded me that we must remain strong in our efforts to stay close to the Lord at all times—there is no room for diversion or weakness in our souls!

I view those trek experiences as an analogy for our membership in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, as well as life in general. In our journey of life, do we get frustrated when we need to slow down for someone else? Are we antsy while waiting for others to learn or be rescued? Are we willing to take the necessary preventative steps to keep our souls healthy and safe—even when those spiritual steps are time consuming? Do we respect our inspired leaders and their vision of what needs to happen for The Church and its members? Do we try our best to keep moving forward, even if it's not at the pace we'd like? Do we run to our Savior when satan tries to confuse or sway us from our eternal goals?

In this race of life, whether we feel we're moving too quickly or too slowly for someone else, we need to keep smiles on our faces and happy attitudes in our hearts—for we never know when those roles will be reversed. Will we, or a loved one, suddenly find ourselves in a less-than-desirable situation that calls for extra patience, and possibly more suffering than we think we can bear? If and when we find ourselves waiting for someone else, instead of becoming frustrated, we would be wise to step outside of ourselves and see if we can help. Similarly, if we truly need help from someone else, we shouldn't turn away from their kind efforts. We must allow for genuine service between each other! :)

Unlike our very organized stake trek itinerary, our Heavenly Father doesn't have a specific schedule or timeline for when each of us should reach important milestones. Our Heavenly Father sees it all, and has placed us in each others' lives for many reasons. Whether we're the helpers or the recipients, we need each other! Unlike what social media has done to our society, the human family needs personal, physical and spiritual interaction daily! We must do our very best to reach out to each other—especially when called upon by the Lord. We must not ignore those vital promptings by the Holy Ghost.

Outstanding Paralympic track athlete Aimee Mullins said,

"There is adversity and challenge in life, and it's all very real and relative to every single person, but the question isn't whether or not you're going to meet adversity, but how you're going to meet it. So, our responsibility is not simply shielding those we care for from adversity, but preparing them to meet it well." 

Brilliant, right?! :)

I believe our pioneer ancestors prepared us to meet our own adversities well. One of the greatest things we can learn from them is how to tackle adversity head-on and endure to the end. They also showed us how to lovingly sacrifice for our faith. I love these words from The Fire of The Covenant, "With nothing left, they still kept their faith in Him." also, "Hold on thy way, be not afraid, for God is on thy side." Our beloved pioneer ancestors never gave up, and neither should we! :)

Now I must share my experience with Martin's Cove, which came on the second day of our trek:

My Fankle was incredibly sore. I awoke that morning wondering how I could possibly keep going. I wanted so badly to jump on the back of a handcart! I wished for a ride on the individual handcarts, but they were reserved for trekkers with serious medical needs and I knew that wasn't me. Despite my pain, I had thoroughly researched sprained ankles before we left and knew that my Fankle was a-okay. I wasn't doing any damage by walking in my brace, so I kept going. But by the time we stopped for lunch, I thought I was going to have to call it a day and hang out with the food committee in their spacious, air-conditioned trailers! I immediately took three ibuprofen and couldn't wait for the pain to subside.

By the time we started walking from the amphitheater up toward Martin's Cove, it had been nearly two hours since I had taken the ibuprofen and I still didn't feel any relief—and I usually feel relief with ibuprofen after about 20–30 minutes. Yet my foot hurt so badly that I was going at a snail's pace. People were passing me faster than they ever had, and I didn't even care anymore!

After we descended into the valley, rounded the first curve into Martin's Cove, and were about 25 feet in, my ankle pain seemed to disappear. I ignored it at first because I thought I'd just taken a really good step. But after about 30 seconds, I realized my pain was lessening with each and every step. Within seconds, I felt no pain in my ankle at all! I looked around, stunned! I kept walking and wondered if I was imagining it, or if it was really happening?

Yet there was no denying it: I was walking without pain for the first time in three weeks, to the day. Tears threatened to give away my joy, but I didn't want someone to mistake them for pain, so I kept them to myself! :) In case you're wondering, my ankle was literally pain-free for about 19 hours—long after the ibuprofen would have worn off. The pain only came back the next day because I did too much when I should have been resting.

As we headed down the slight incline of Martin's Cove, I suddenly saw my daughter up ahead of me. At that very moment, a beautiful monarch butterfly flew in front of her and landed on her back. The butterfly rested there for a few seconds, then flew off again. I gasped and said to Greg, "Did you see the butterfly on ______?!" He said, "Yes," as we watched the butterfly fly back to our daughter and land on her again—in the very same spot on her back. I was so excited! The butterfly flew away as I quietly gushed to Greg about what we'd seen. He was pretty excited, too. Yet when that beautiful monarch butterfly flew to our daughter and landed on her back for a third time, I knew that my little sister, Mackenzie, was telling me she was absolutely with us on trek. :)

You see, ever since Mackenzie died, our family has continually seen monarch butterflies when we get together for important family functions, or when we're talking about her. Many times when I think about Mackenzie, a monarch butterfly will suddenly fly into my view. Some people might call those butterfly encounters just a coincidence, but our family has experienced this happy little miracle too many times to believe it's just a coincidence. And the fact that my daughter—and it was only her—had that big, beautiful monarch butterfly land on her shirt three times, out in the middle of nowhere Wyoming, well, no one can ever convince me that it was just a coincidence. Interestingly, my son said he also saw a lot of butterflies while on trek. :)

Our walk through Martin's Cove was amazing. Not only was I given a miracle with my vanishing ankle pain, but I finally understood the reason Fankle wasn't just an accident. I was so happy to have that answer, especially since I knew I was inspired to go longboarding that night! Feeling my littlest sister's spirit there helped me know—absolutely—that many beloved angels were with our stake trek members! The Spirit was unbelievably strong in Martin's Cove—it was the loveliest feeling and I'll never forget it!

In Dallin H. Oaks' talk, "Following the Pioneers," he asks us, "...After all these [pioneer] studies and activities, it is appropriate to ask ourselves, 'Therefore, what?' Are these pioneer celebrations academic, merely increasing our fund of experiences and knowledge? Or will they have a profound impact on how we live our lives?" My reply to Elder Oaks' question is this:

My sacred experiences in Martin's Cove illustrate that miracles still happen. And if miracles still happen for me, all of those astounding miracles that happened to the pioneers aren't just inspiring, tear-inducing stories—they're real. The pioneers' strength and unbelievable sacrifices were not given in vain, but for the greatest cause of following our Savior, Jesus Christ, and returning to our Heavenly Father.

Like Elder Walker said about our pioneer ancestors, we are "standing on the shoulders of giants." We should look to our pioneer loved ones with the utmost respect, reverence, awe and happiness because they got it. They understood what's most important in life: living the Gospel of Jesus Christ and sharing it with everyone they possibly could; and they gave everything to meet those goals.

Elder Hales said, "The Lord expects us to be as faithful, as devoted, as courageous as those who went before us. They were called to give their lives for the gospel. We are called to live our lives for the same purpose." Yes, we should give our very best in living and sharing the gospel of Jesus Christ. There has never been a better time to be a missionary, and yes, we can be missionaries each and every day of our lives!

Lastly, I'm inspired by the pioneer ancestor stories I didn't find. I know several of my pioneer ancestors' names and important dates, but nothing was written about their lives. I was deeply saddened that there's nothing online to tell of my ancestors' life experiences. In those moments of non-discovery, I realized their silent advice is that we must write down our own stories! If we don't write about our lives, no one will do it for us—unless we're lucky enough to have a loved one write it. Yet do we really want someone else telling our story? I feel strongly that we must write about our own lives for our posterity's benefit! :)

A 2013 New York Times article said, "The single most important thing you can do for your family may be the simplest of all: develop a strong family narrative... [Children] who know a lot about their families tend to do better when they face challenges." After learning about Robert, Maria, Jane, Susanah, and James, I couldn't agree more!

I hope and pray we will choose to be like The Fire of the Covenant song where it says, "...we will rise up and shine the light He gives. And with the Saints we will testify: He lives!"

I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

P.S. I know I've shared this quote on my blog before, but it's one of my all-time favorites and I'm sharing it again! :)



The next post in My Fankle Journey is "Fankle, Continued..."