Strengthening Our Families

Hi, everyone! This morning, I was getting ready to compose an Instagram post on my private account. As I was downloading photos and screenshots to create a visually interesting post, I realized that I needed this post to be public, and that Instagram couldn't really hold all of the wonderfulness that I've found.

Plus, I'm super wordy and I struggle with editing my Instagram posts to be the length allowed on that platform. #wordyAdrie! 😄 Sometimes, I've spent way too much time figuring out what words/sentences to omit on Instagram, when I really should have just written a blog post to begin with! Thus, today I'm breaking my time-consuming Instagram-posting habit and writing a time-consuming-but-much-more-fulfilling blog post instead! Ha ha. Yay me!

If you didn't know, I'm right smack dab in the middle of raising teenagers! What's amazing to me about this season of life is that when you're pregnant, or just had a baby, no doctor or nurse or parenting book fully prepares you for teenagers and all that comes with them! 😅 Even though I took a complete Love and Logic parenting class in Colorado when my firstborn was (I think) seven years old, it still didn't prepare me for these wild teenage years!

Yes, we parents were all teenagers once, but being a teen and raising teens are two very different things! I certainly remember being a teenager and all that entails, but I could go on for days about how surprising it's been to parent my teenagers! It's nearly unbelievable how quickly teen emotions change—my view of my family can go from being "Everything is easy-peasy, super awesome!" to "I'm so tired! How am I going to make it through one more day of teenagedom without crying my eyes out?!" in nearly an instant!

The good news is, all things considered, my sweet little family is doing well!

My oldest son just graduated from high school and I'm sooo happy for him! It was a definite struggle at some points of his high school journey, but we all hung in there and he was successful in his efforts! 🎓👏😁 That said, I will not miss those seemingly never-ending high school nights when he refused to go to bed at a decent hour. If I didn't know what I know about teenagers and their sleep cycles, I would have been a complete wreck!

Thankfully, I know it's not just my teenagers who don't want to go to sleep at night, but a scientifically proven problem for teens the world over. The National Sleep Foundation points out that, "Biological sleep patterns shift toward later times for both sleeping and waking during adolescence—meaning it is natural to not be able to fall asleep before 11:00 pm." Amen to that statement! And yet I wonder why on earth it is that high school is still held at such an early hour! We seriously need to make every high school's start time later in the morning!

Sleep aside, my teenagers are doing really well for being teenagers. 😊 I am so grateful for the incredible human beings I've been given and entrusted to raise. My heart is completely filled with love for my growing babies! 💖 That said, I am constantly looking for ways to help my children feel happier, do better, and be the best version of themselves—without me becoming an annoying dictator in the process! Ha ha.

I know that being a good parent starts with me and my positive attitude. That said, even though I'm technically and legally responsible for my darling children and their well-being until the age of 18, in the end, they each need to live their own lives and be in charge of themselves. They need to make their choices and own them—I so hope they make good ones! In the end, I'm only able to regulate/manage/change myself! And that's how it is for every person on this planet!

So, as much as I dearly want to help my children every minute of every day of their precious lives, I can only help them to the point that they want me to help. Yes, parenting teenagers is a delicate tightrope-walk that takes loads of careful practice, purposeful dedication, laser-sharp focus, and enthusiastic perseverance! Not to mention, an endless supply of unconditional love, great self confidence, and lots of "strength training"!

But seriously, parents of teenagers need to have good support systems and excellent self-care measures in place to feel successful in their callings. I would not do as well as I do in parenting my teenagers without my coping strategies—for example: having a wonderful marriage; exercising five to six days per week; getting enough sleep; eating healthily; having good friends/family members to talk with; and especially my spiritual connection to Heaven.

Speaking of prayer, it's my go-to best parenting technique for raising teenagers! I literally can't tell you how many times I've prayed for my teens because I'm always praying for them! 💗 I know our Heavenly Father knows my children much better than I do, and I know He actually sees what their future holds—unlike me who just thinks I know what's best for my children. Thus, my prayers are always first and foremost in my parenting strategies. I have experienced miracles through prayer and fasting for my children! I will continue praying for my children every day for the rest of my life and into eternity!

As I said before, I'm always seeking out ways to be a better mother. I've shared many helpful motherhood/parenting articles, talks, and videos on my Pinterest account, and I'll continue sharing what I find there, but I've definitely not had the time to pin everything yet. I seriously wish Heavenly Father would give us three additional hours every day! A 27-hour day sounds pretty great to me! So, for today, I'll share here the things I've recently found to be helpful in my efforts of parenting my cherished teenagers:

"To Women: 'Doing Better Doesn’t Mean Doing More'"
By Sharon Eubank and Reyna Aburto—blog post on LDS.org.

I love the entire blog post, but this paragraph really stood out to me:

"As we seek the Lord’s will and strive to do it, we are assured that every small effort is accepted. All the Lord asks of us is a heart full of love and willingness to share that love. We’ve all made covenants to “mourn with those that mourn … and comfort those that stand in need of comfort” (Mosiah 18:9), but that doesn’t mean to run ourselves ragged. Doing better doesn’t always mean doing more. And if you do just one inspired thing each day, you are nevertheless the Lord’s agent."

Amen, sista, and bravo! 👏😁

"Love One Another, As I Have Loved You"
By Jennifer Brinkerhoff Platt—talk presented at BYU Women's Conference, 2018.

I'm so excited Jennifer's talk is available to read and watch! I've listened to her video at least three times already, and I'll be listening to/watching/reading it again very soon! Here are three sections of her talk that I absolutely love!

"...if we really understand the distinction between doctrine, principles and application, then we will work to focus more on the doctrine—the WHY of our behaviors. Focusing on application or HOW we live is divisive, because I shouldn’t judge you for what the Holy Ghost is telling you to do. I may not understand your approach, but if we are one in doctrine, in the WHY, then it doesn’t matter how we pursue it."

"Continually pointing ourselves to the doctrine helps us to be one in Christ as He is one with the Father. Think of the love we extend to each other when instead of judging HOW another person is living, we assume the very best, that they are pursuing doctrine. Look for and trust the WHY of other’s behaviors. Teach and testify of WHY we do what we do. This gives us entrance into the sacred spaces of one another’s hearts where there is hidden sorrow that the eye can’t see. We also learn to pursue our questions differently and find peace with the ambiguity associated with mortality."

"Now, do you recognize this statement from President Boyd K. Packer? 

'True doctrine, understood, changes attitudes and behaviors. The study of the doctrines of the gospel will improve behavior quicker than a study of behavior will improve behavior. Preoccupation with unworthy behavior can lead to unworthy behavior. That is why we stress so forcefully the study of the doctrines of the gospel.'"

So awesome, right?! 😀

"How great leaders inspire action"
By Simon Sinek—TEDxPuget Sound

It might seem strange to relate this TED Talk to parenting, but it really clicked with me! I've simply applied what he said to parenting and children! 😊 Here's a great quote from Mr. Sinek's wise words:

"Every single person, every single organization on the planet knows what they do, 100 percent. Some know how they do it, ... But very, very few people or organizations know why they do what they do. And by 'why' I don't mean 'to make a profit.' That's a result. It's always a result. By 'why,' I mean: What's your purpose? What's your cause? What's your belief? Why does your organization exist? Why do you get out of bed in the morning? And why should anyone care? As a result, the way we think, we act, the way we communicate is from the outside in, it's obvious. We go from the clearest thing to the fuzziest thing. But the inspired leaders and the inspired organizations—regardless of their size, regardless of their industry—all think, act and communicate from the inside out."

I also really like Simon's second TED Talk: "Why good leaders make you feel safe," and applied what he teaches to parenting, as well! Here's one of my favorite quotes from his talk:

"Leadership is a choice. It is not a rank. I know many people at the senior[-]most levels of organizations who are absolutely not leaders. They are authorities, and we do what they say because they have authority over us, but we would not follow them. And I know many people who are at the bottoms of organizations who have no authority and they are absolutely leaders, and this is because they have chosen to look after the person to the left of them, and they have chosen to look after the person to the right of them. This is what a leader is."

"The Idea of 'Mothers in Zion' Made Me Mad—Until I Learned What It Meant"
By Sharon Eubank—blog post on LDS.org.

Oh, how I love her quote! 💛

"Charity, or the pure love of Christ, is motherhood in a very practical and real way—sacrificing so that others might thrive and seeing beyond present circumstances to the way things really are. This motherhood is part of my covenantal identity. My mother-work will come directly through the whispers of the Holy Spirit."

"Strengthening the Family: Resource Guide for Parents"
Published by The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints—also available for purchase at LDS.org's online store.

This is the gem of all parenting jewels! I'm so happy I found Strengthening the Family! I'll be reading and referring to it again and again! I only wish it had been available when I was pregnant with my first baby! It was published in 2006, two years after my last baby was born, but I never knew about it until recently. Thus, I'm sharing it with the world now in hopes that it helps some new parent somewhere in this glorious world of ours! While I feel silly that I had access to it all this time with the amazing Gospel Library app on my smartphone and didn't previously find it, I'm not going to worry because at least I'll be using it now!

Here are two great quotes from its pages:

"Words and behavior have the power to hurt or to help, to inflict pain and suffering or to soothe painful feelings, to provoke doubt and fear or to instill faith and courage." 

"President James E. Faust of the First Presidency taught the importance of love and of recognizing differences in children when disciplining them: 'Child rearing is so individualistic. Every child is different and unique. What works with one may not work with another. I do not know who is wise enough to say what discipline is too harsh or what is too lenient except the parents of the children themselves, who love them most. It is a matter of prayerful discernment for the parents. Certainly the overarching and undergirding principle is that the discipline of children must be motivated more by love than by punishment.'"

President Faust's quote can apply to every parenting issue under the sun because we parents know and love our children the most! We have the individual responsibility and joy of parenting our children in the best ways possible for each of them because they are "ours"! 💞

I'm so grateful for this gift of motherhood I've been given because it's everything to me! 🎁 When I say everything, I mean that I always wanted to be a mother{!}—from my earliest memories—and I'm so grateful my wish/desire has been so richly fulfilled! And I must give huge props to my darling Gregor for helping me achieve my dreams of motherhood!

While I know my time is short in terms of having my children live with me (and Greg 😍) before they move on into the wide wide world, I will always be a mother; I am eternally a mother, inside and out! Regardless of the outcome of my children's lives—whatever path they choose in this world—I will love and care for these amazing souls that our Heavenly Father has blessed me with forever! 😇

You've come to the end of my parenting thoughts/helps for now, but I'll share more as I discover them! I'd love it if something I've shared today is of value to you or someone you know! I sincerely hope we'll all work on strengthening our families because relationships with our loved ones are the most important! 💛

Family-Focused Family Home Evening

For my family's family home evening this past Monday night, I chose two of BYUTV's amazing Turning Point episodes for us to watch: San Pasqual Academy and The Clarks.

After watching those two inspiring videos on my own, I felt so strongly that my children absolutely needed to learn life lessons from those sweet children in California's foster care system, and especially from the wonderful Clark family. And I knew that our family home evening was the perfect opportunity for us to learn together! 😊

While those Turning Point episodes show the immense value of solid/good personal relationships, they especially point out the vast importance of families—which begin from having good parents (and grandparents, whenever possible)!

When my family finished watching San Pasqual Academy and The Clarks, Greg and I had a fairly long conversation with our children about life.

Greg and I reminded our children how incredibly blessed we are to have each other in our very own eternal family! We already have everything those darling foster-care children were seeking and desired so deeply within their lonely, lost souls. No one can ever put a price on the earthly and eternal bond my family has!

We pointed out that San Diego County finally realized—after interviewing many foster-care children—just how invaluable the basic family structure is—including mothers, fathers, children, grandparents, etc. I wanted our children to internalize that those elected officials in California thought it important enough to recreate traditional families for many foster-care children who had lost all hope.

Greg and I helped our "babies" understand that if children are going to be successful, they always need good mothers and fathers in their lives that possess consistent and correct parenting skills!

We also discussed how the amazing Clark parents taught through their example that selflessness, pure love and endless dedication is needed in raising children well. Those same vital principles also apply to children contributing to the happiness of their families. The 21 loving, responsible, kind and cooperative Clark children were a sight to behold! And I've already hoisted Mary Beth and Scott Clark (the amazing parents) on a pretty sizable pedestal! 😉

Greg and I have talked with our children umpteen times about the great importance of parents having a good marriage, but we pointed it out again because we can never undervalue the fact that a solid, loving marriage is what keeps every family going in the right direction!

Our children understand that while no one is perfect, all of us can try to improve ourselves daily! And after watching those two lovely Turning Point videos, I dearly hope my darlings further internalized that family members really can help each other be happy and become better people!

Gratitude was also a big focus of our night. Greg and I really wanted our children (and us!) to remember to be sooo grateful for our lives and the opportunities we've been given! But we also wanted them to realize that even if people don't have the best upbringing, they can still make good choices and live productive, happy lives!

Most importantly, Greg and I helped our children see that each of us can make a very positive impact in this world! Even though we may feel like our lives are small, or they don't matter much, that's most definitely not the case! Every child, sibling and parent can make a difference in someone else's life—even if it's just our own life for a little while! Yes, sometimes we need to work on ourselves before we can branch out and help someone else. But I believe the ultimate goal of this life is for everyone to be happy and to love and serve others to the very best of our abilities—just like Jesus Christ did. 😊

As you may have guessed, our children weren't too thrilled with Greg and I taking away so much time from their Monday night of technology fun. Yes, my babies were very verbal about their unhappiness with our family home evening decision 😒. Yet I did not care how bothered they were because our FHE was worth every single one of those little frustrations! 😊

I love that I accomplished my goal of carving out our essential family togetherness time—especially when I knew it was going to be a battle to have such a l-o-n-g (in their eyes) family home evening. Yet despite my darlings' complaints, I know our family-focused family home evening bonded us and will be remembered for even longer—and that's what really matters!

And now, for your viewing pleasure, here are the wonderful Turning Point episodes—complete with beautiful, uplifting music(!)—that taught my children so much! *FYI, you can turn off the closed captioning by clicking on the "cc" sign and clicking the "on" to "off."

San Pasqual Academy:



The Clarks:



P.S. Please feel free to use this FHE lesson idea and pass it along to others! I know it will impact your family for the better! 😀 Plus, I'd love the entire world to fully internalize just how important good parenting is! Let's spread the word that there is nothing better than having dedicated, Paramount Parents!

Happily Marching On!

Wow, I have been MIA for a long time! I think this is the longest I've gone without writing a blog post ever! Yes, there has been a lot going on in my little world.

Remember the possible trial I wrote about several weeks ago? Well, it most definitely showed up—except, it wasn't the trial I was expecting. The trial I thought would manifest itself in one child actually reared its trying head in another one of my children!

It's interesting because I can see very clearly now that the Lord had been preparing me through one child, so I could be ready for the trial in my other child. I won't go into personal details here because the trial my child endured is very personal.

Suffice it to say, with this new trial, we've had to deal with physical issues that we've never dealt with before. Those physical issues translated into emotional issues, too. A minor—yet still very nerve-wracking—surgery was performed on my precious child. Thankfully, the outcome was better-than-expected! I could finally breathe! That said, our finances have been put through the ringer—which induced a whole new level of breathlessness in my soul! But due to the miracle of tithing blessings, and a very generous grandmother (Thank you, my sweetest Mama!), we are still hanging on! This quote (below) describes perfectly how I feel! And I can totally imagine Rod cheerfully shaking my shoulders and yelling to me,

"You are hanging on by a very thin thread and I dig that about you!" – Rod Tidwell, Jerry Maguire (From the edited, clean movie version! Ha ha.)

I created this using the Arizona Sun Devils' color codes! Remember the other Rod Tidwell quote? "I'm from Arizona, Jerry! I broke Arizona records! I went to Arizona State! I'm a Sun Devil, man!" Thus, I just had to go with that color scheme. Ha ha.

Oh, that quote makes me laugh every time I think about it! :) These moments in life are precisely why we need good entertainment in our world!

But back to the trial coming to my family in a different way than we expected, isn't that the way life always is? I've come to realize (yet again!) that no matter how much we prepare, there is literally no way we can ever be truly prepared for everything. It's impossible to predict what this life will throw at us! Thus, I believe the best way to prepare for every trial we face is to cultivate a truly deep, personal, meaningful and eternal relationship with our Heavenly Father, through His Son, Jesus Christ. The fabulous scripture found in John 14:26 is perfectly applicable to my trial:

"But the Comforter, which is the Holy Ghost, whom the Father will send in my name, he shall teach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you."

Yes, I've needed the Holy Ghost so much during the past two months! Of course, I need and rely on him every day, but it was never more apparent than during our trial.

As I reflect on the worrisome feelings I had as we faced this new medical challenge, and the money involved(!), I'm beyond grateful for my strong testimony of our Heavenly Father, Jesus Christ, and for the influence of the Holy Ghost!

I can't help but think back to the day I lovingly held my child in my bed, intensely and sincerely praying for relief. It amazes me to this day that in the very moment of my child's greatest moment of pain and fear, my powerful prayers were totally answered. My child was instantly comforted, a major problem was revealed and simultaneously resolved! There is no doubt in my mind that our Heavenly Father heard me! It was no small miracle to this concerned mother. And I will never forget the sun spilling through my window, warming us, as if to say, "Don't worry, it will be all right!"

*Side note: I'm not writing about my "powerful" prayers in a proud way. I'm simply illustrating that I literally felt a power come from within me as I fervently prayed for my suffering child. I felt as if a channel or tunnel was coming directly out of my soul, sending my prayers straight to Heavenly Father in our time of sincerest need. Plus, my husband was out of town on business, so there was no one in my house who could give my child a priesthood blessing. (No, my child didn't want me to call anyone to come help, and I respected that.) Shortly after that amazing experience is when I took my child to the doctor—for the second time during our trial (one of many appointments)—and the result of that prayer was manifest in my child's test results. {And of course, my husband gave our child a priesthood blessing before the minor surgery. When Greg is home, I totally utilize his marvelous priesthood power! :)}

Even in my moments of profound motherly worry, I received this inspiration from the Holy Ghost, "Don't worry, _____ will be okay." He didn't tell me everything would be beach resorts filled with lazy ease and fine luxury, but I knew we wouldn't be devastated by this trial—and that, my friends, is worth everything!

Thus, after the upheaval of the past two months (Our trial was barely beginning when I wrote my previous blog post and I never, ever expected it to go the direction it went!)—as well as just the normal, everyday busyness of life—I hope to begin blogging more regularly again. Yay! I have so many things to write about! I tell ya, I could write for hours a day and never get bored! Ha ha.

So, I will end with this: Today, March 1st, 2016, is the third anniversary of when my darling Gregor told me we were moving back to Utah (from Texas)! 03/01/13 will forever remain in my list of "Happiest Dates Ever!" Oh yes, I am happily marching on, and I hope you are, too! Seriously, every day we are granted on this earth is such a blessing! We have so much to live for and so many people to love! Now, let's get out there and make this world a better place! :)

P.S. I know that fasting also helped my beloved child during this trial—there is no doubt in my mind! :)

A Mother's A

Tonight's quick post was spurred by an article I feel the need to share, "The Price We Pay for an A," by Katie Stirling. I recommend reading it if you have the time so you'll better understand where my opinions are coming from. :)

Before you continue reading , please know that I mean no offense to anyone who has made different life choices than me. I'm simply sharing my thoughts because I think every mother can learn from Mrs. Sterling's choices. It's a good read, but also hard to read because all I could think about were her crying children! #bustmyheart! :(

I find it fascinating that even though the author ultimately made the right decision to sell her business (Good for her! Seriously!), she admitted she's not yet cured of her A-seeking "illness." I also find it sad that she considers herself to be "just a mom." :( Yet I wonder, did she mean that phrase in a sarcastic way? I admit I'm not a great in the ways of interpreting or delivering sarcasm, so I'm not sure.

Her article definitely makes me wonder what her children will say when they're grown...

I wish Mrs. Sterling could have the attitude of desiring nothing more than to be a top-tiered mother (until her children are grown), for there are many ways to gain a "Mother's A"—trust me, they are enough!! :) I'm constantly evaluating myself as a mother, and many days, I totally give myself a big, chunky-font A with a happy gold star! Ha ha. And when I don't deserve a Mother's A, I take a step back, review the objectives/expectations of my job description and mentally rewrite my goals for the next day/week/month/year(s). While we're at it, let's remember that every person's definition of success is different!

The amazing gift of motherhood is the ability to know immediately how we're doing. Our children give us instant feedback, so there's no need for a quarterly review. We'll never have to wonder where we land in our children's end-of-the-year performance ranking! Ha ha.

Reading things like "The Price We Pay for an A" instantly reminds me how happy I am that Greg and I have absolutely done what was needed (every time!) to keep me home with our children—despite the fact that we've been endlessly tight on money. The choices we've made as a happily married couple are worth every missing penny because we know our kids were played with, cared for and raised by their own engaged and available mother! :) Meaning I'm engaged with my children, and I'm available anytime they need me! Well, as close to 100% of the time as a person can get.

I sincerely hope every mother decides that earning a Mother's A is enough! For the good "grades" we receive from raising our children well are worth much more than any reward a college, university, boss or bank could bestow upon us. :)

P.S. I'm thinking I could categorize this post as a sort of follow-up to "Hiring Out Our Future." :)

Hiring Out Our Future

If you've read some of my other blog posts, you've seen my passion for parenting, raising children well and strengthening families. I write about those topics a lot because I'm right in the thick of raising my darling children, so they're constantly on my mind. Oh, how I love my two handsome boys and my beautiful daughter! So, yes, this will be another post about the importance of motherhood and fatherhood! :) If you're bored of the topic, I say, oh well! #sorrynotsorry ;) And if you choose to be offended by my words, please read my previous blog post, "Pesky Pernicious Perilous Pride." :)

I've been fiercely loyal to stay-at-home motherhood my entire life. This strong loyalty comes mainly from my sincere love and concern for the well-being of all children, but also from knowing my own mother as a stay-at-home mom and a career mom. My mom and I have talked about this issue umpteen times and we've come to an understanding about our lives and the way her magnificent teaching career affected our family, so I know she's okay with me writing about her in this way. (Hi Mom! I love you!)

Basically, it comes down to this: my life was awesome when I had a mother whose primary responsibility was her family; my life was not as great when my mother went back to work.

Don't misunderstand—my childhood family did very well in life and I'm sure we appeared quite successful to those around us. In fact, I'm guessing many people out there would hear our family's story and say, "Boohoo. Quit complaining. Your life was a walk in the park compared to mine." But when it comes right down to it, my father should not have asked my mother to go back to work so he could open his own business, and—as utterly heartbreaking as it is to see his pain—he's freely admitted his mistake.

By the way, there are so many layers involved in my childhood family's story that I don't have time or stamina to go into them here. Suffice it to say, my mom most definitely wasn't on-board with my dad's decision to have her go back to work and that decision affected all of us—in mostly negative ways. Now that our family history has been written, my dad agrees with us that my mom should have never been required to go back to teaching.

*The great paradox of my childhood family's story are the hundreds of students my mother so positively affected. She literally changed countless lives for the best because of her marvelous teaching abilities, talents and endlessly loving/happy personality. My dedicated mother was such a force for good! I know my mom's students are so grateful for her and I'm so glad they see her immense value, but our family suffered while they benefited from my mother's sacrifice. Even though I've moved-on and absolutely love my life, I regret my childhood family's loss to this day.

I'm guessing my younger sisters didn't feel so sad about my mom going back to work because they were just that: too young to remember the difference. I, on the other hand, vividly remember the difference in my mother before she went back to work and after she became a career woman.

My sweet mama always passionately states that she wishes she could have been a full-time stay-at-home mom more than anything! At least she had the opportunity to stay home with her children for about 14 years. And you'd better believe I am so thankful for those 12 years I had with my mom at home!!! In our general society, I'm guessing most people think that 14 years is way too long to stay home with your children. But in a child's mind, I'm guessing they never want their mother to leave home—because I felt exactly that way.

Thus, I've been disturbed again (what else is new?! ha ha) with what is going on in our world. Call me a broken record, but I firmly believe all of our world's woes come from children being raised by people other than their happily-married parents. Children need to be raised by their mothers and fathers! Call me a traditionalist (I'll take that as a compliment!), but I still believe mothers are the best day-in and day-out caregivers to their children. Yet if a father is able to be a stay-at-home dad, I'm all for it! :)

What I'm saying (and will continue firmly stating until the day I die!), is that children need at least one parent home raising them at all times. That parental influence needs to stay with the child until he/she has graduated from high school! Of course, dating and occasional short vacations (for parents) away from home are okay and good for every family (as long as another competent caregiver is present), but parents shouldn't be the occasional caregivers that show up between work hours or social events.

My strong feelings for this post were spurred by a few articles I stumbled across over the past several weeks. For starters, I read about Marissa Mayer's scheduled upcoming 14-day maternity leave in this LinkedIn article, "How Marissa Mayer's Maternity Decision Affects Young Women—Whether She Likes It Or Not." (Marissa Mayer is Yahoo's CEO.) I seriously wonder what Ms. Mayer thinking? At the very least, she should remain at home for six weeks to allow her body to heal from delivering her twins! Don't agree with me? Read, "Postpartum: First 6 Weeks After Childbirth—Recovery At Home," by WebMD, and you might change your mind. Thinking about the two babies at home who will need Mrs. Mayer—and deserve her!—makes me want to cry. Every baby needs their mother!

I also clicked on the link inside the above-listed article that took me to Time Magazine's article, "Matt Lauer Asked Mary Barra If She Can Be a Good Mom and Run GM" (the title is self explanatory). I shuddered when Mary Barra said, "I’m pretty proud of the way my kids are supporting me in this." Seriously? The way your kids are supporting you in this? Um, Mrs. Barra, parenting works the other way around: we must support our children in every way possible as they grow and until they leave our nests!

Both of those articles convey the problem with our society: children are often viewed as assets to be managed, not raised. I sound unbelievably harsh, but I can't stop wondering: why do parents have children if they're just going to hand them off to nannies, daycare and after-school programs?! And no, I don't want people to stop having children...I just want children to receive the proper and continuous attention they deserve from their parents! :)

Hey, I get it. There are certain times when outside childcare is necessary for survival. The lovely family I nannied for in Michigan was in a tight spot: divorced/single mother of a special-needs child. That precious soul with Down Syndrome and Autism was precisely why I wanted to become a nanny: because I knew his sweet mother literally couldn't do it all by herself. If she didn't work, where would they live—how would they survive? The same generosity applies to single fathers, widows and widowers. Thus, I knew my intense love for helping children grow and progress was exactly what that darling single-parent/special-needs-child family needed. I was so happy with my chosen "profession"!

But for those families that are in the sweet spot of having two living married parents, why won't one of them stay home full-time to care for their child(ren)? Why won't they alternate the stay-at-home parenting duties between husband and wife?

A few weeks ago while folding laundry, I decided to watch the series finale of Melissa and Joey on Netflix. Despite their differences in lifestyle choices from mine (lack of following the Word of Wisdom; and major morality issues), I greatly enjoyed their chemistry and some of the story lines—they really made me laugh! But at the end of the episode (spoiler alert!), I was more than disappointed when Mel decided to still run for congress even though she found out she was pregnant with twins. Part of the last scene played out like this:

Mel: Someone wants to publish your book? That's great!
Joe: Well, yeah, I know, but it's not gonna happen.
Mel: Why not?
Joe: Why not? Because read on, honey, they also want me to do a big book tour.
Mel: That's fantastic!
Joe: No, no, it's not fan... Com'on, we can't have twins, run for congress and a book tour—that's not gonna work.
Mel: Are you kidding, Joe? That's the starter pistol. Bang! (That's another part of the story earlier in the episode.)
Joe: Do you really think we can do it?
Mel: We'll hire a nanny!
Insert Adrie's commentary: A nanny is not the answer! Aahh!

At that very moment I thought, "Melissa and Joey's mentality is precisely what's wrong with our society—everyone is hiring out our future!" And after everyone has hired out our future—i.e., raising the children of this world through nannies, daycare and after-school programs—they have the audacity to wonder what is happening in our world! It is very frustrating to me.

Granted, I know not everyone is struggling. There are a lot of happy families and I'm so very grateful for their wonderful influence on our world! :) But the endlessly tragic/horrific news stories—that seem to get worse with each passing year—have everything to do with the way our world's children aren't being raised enough by their parents.

Children are crying out for the unconditional love, attention and time of their parents. When those special spirits (every child is important!) don't receive what they need at home, they look elsewhere to fill their "love buckets." Sometimes they land in a good spot with good people to teach, mentor and love them, but more often than not, those soul-wearied children end up in situations that turn them into less than our Heavenly Father intended, which is a true tragedy.

Many of those children recover from their less-than-stellar childhoods and go on to live very good lives—and I strongly believe every adult is responsible for their own happiness. Yet countless other children stay in their sad lives and become the adults who are unable to see another way to live. Sadly, when those lost children become parents, the regrettable cycle continues.

I admit, there are dismal childhood outcomes for stay-at-home parents, too, despite their best efforts. I know stay-at-home parenting isn't the 100% cure-all for every problem in our world—but it comes pretty darn close at 98%! ;) (That's my personal figure. Ha ha.) That said, I wish I could spread my soul's feelings/thoughts to every corner of our universe:

Children need their parents at every single stage of their lives! Just because a baby won't have memories until they are two, that doesn't mean said baby doesn't need a constant and consistent caregiver, i.e., a stay-at-home mother or father! Just because a pre-teen is ultra capable and responsible "above their years," that doesn't mean said older child doesn't need a parent who is daily involved in supervising their growth. Just because a teenager earns great grades, or is a fantastic athlete, or is super popular in school, or has a bright future with a college scholarship (how exciting!), that doesn't mean said teenager doesn't need a parent to come home to every day after school, and one who can stay up late to hear about every date!

*I also think children who are forced to grow up too quickly have major life struggles that could be avoided if they were simply allowed to be children until the proper time.

My list of children's needs go on and on. I'm sure many people reading my blog posts are tired of hearing me say the same things over and over. (Is anyone still reading?!) Yet I cannot get my feelings (about raising children) out of my mind, and my blog is my favorite place to share my thoughts! :) Besides, my thinking eventually returns to, "There has to be someone, somewhere, reading my post who will make the best choice for their family and become (or continue being) an attentive/engaged stay-at-home parent! Surely they'll realize their sacrifices can instantly change their child's life for the best and just do it!" At least I have hope that my words can help somehow! :)

Recently, I was so excited to see the conclusion to an article I read three years ago on The Atlantic (I love that magazine!) because it definitely helps support my feelings. I'll talk about the first article, then the most recent article.

In 2012, I eagerly read "Why Women Still Can’t Have It All," by Anne-Marie Slaughter, July/August 2012 Issue. Based on the title, I initially thought how great it would be to read an article by a successful career woman and mother who was willing to lay it out so plainly: that women cannot have career and family success at the same time—that one of them will suffer, and we ladies must choose. I dearly hoped she chose full-time stay-at-home motherhood! Instead, I was disappointed to read these sentences:

"I still strongly believe that women can 'have it all' (and that men can too). I believe that we can 'have it all at the same time.' But not today, not with the way America’s economy and society are currently structured."

and 

"...I had the ability to set my own schedule most of the time. I could be with my kids when I needed to be, and still get the work done."

I still get so riled up by her words because, again, the author's thoughts seems to be focused more about what she (the mother) wants, not what is best for her children! It's another classic example of the mother fitting her children into her schedule—when it's convenient for her—instead of being available when her children need her.

My view of motherhood resembles this: picture in your mind children happily playing, working or studying. Their mother is in the same room, working on whatever it is she needs or wants to get done, but she is available to help her children out whenever they need her. Obviously, the mother is available to the realistic extent possible because I know no mother is available literally every minute of every day. Mothers are not slaves. Children need to be taught the value of patience and that the word "no" is a part of everyday life. But my point (in my view of motherhood) is that all children should be given the opportunity to learn, grow and enjoy life with their mothers nearby. Then the mother is able to successfully interact with her children in happy/fun/intelligent/kind ways, and make needed course corrections as they arise. The mother certainly doesn't need to hover, but there is such a peaceful feeling children receive just by knowing for sure their mother is completely there for them—in every sense of the word! :)

Later in the article, Ms. Slaughter made the statement, "The discipline, organization, and sheer endurance it takes to succeed at top levels with young children at home is easily comparable to running 20 to 40 miles a week." I understand she's stating how hard it is for women to break into a man's career world, but when mothers are raising their children, I say motherhood is the ultimate career! Succeeding at "top levels" doesn't have to include a paycheck in your mailbox every two weeks or a glowing year-end review with a Christmas bonus!

To use Anne-Marie's own words, "Our assumptions are just that: things we believe that are not necessarily so." Nope, it's not necessary to have the immaculate business office, a beautiful view of the city, an envious pension plan, the fancy job title, and an amazing paycheck with the prestige and honor to match, for the title of Mother supersedes it all. Yes, ladies, once our children are raised, we'll have plenty of time to climb to the very tip-top of whatever career we choose—while simultaneously shoveling piles of money aside! Ha ha.

But I digress...

One of Mrs. Slaughter's sentences, "Perhaps the most encouraging news of all for achieving the sorts of changes that I have proposed is that men are joining the cause." is the perfect lead-in to the follow-up article in The Atlantic, "Why I Put My Wife’s Career First," by Andrew Moravcsik, October 2015 Issue. The author is Anne-Marie's husband, so I was fascinated to read what he had to share about their family. Mr. Moravcsik states (these sentences are from all over the article, not right in order):

"A female executive needs what male CEOs have always had: a spouse who bears the burden at home." 

"...most two-career families sooner or later find that one person falls into the role of lead parent." 

"Lead parenting is being on the front lines of everyday life." 

"Lead parenting is not merely its own reward; it also unlocks a capacity for caring and closeness that can last a lifetime." 

"Despite many days of weariness, I would never give up my years of being what the journalist Katrin Bennhold has called 'The One'... ...When my sons turn to me in this way, I feel a pride that is in many respects deeper than any pride I have experienced professionally."

Yes, Mr. Moravcsik gets it! :) I'm glad his wife and sons have him in their lives! His choice to be the lead parent is precisely the example other husbands and wives can look to when the mother wants to pursue a career outside the home. Yet I still would have recommended that he be the stay-at-home father—but a lead parent is better than a nanny, daycare or after-school programs! :)

That said, I must reiterate that I truly believe with my whole heart and soul that women are best suited for the full-time job of raising of children. (As I've said before, I know sometimes that blanket statement doesn't apply to everyone.)

To further support my mama-bear thoughts, please read this sentence from Andrew's article, "Despite their superior performance in college, surprisingly few women reach the pinnacles of professional success..." *If that previous sentence is true, then women really are the best candidates for the job of raising children! Take that! Ha ha. Sorry, I just couldn't resist throwing that fabulous tidbit in there. ;) And Dr. Bill Sears agrees with me (no, I've never met him, but I'd like to!):

"To your baby, you are the best mother." – William Sears, The Attachment Parenting Book : A Commonsense Guide to Understanding and Nurturing Your Baby. 

Of course, his wonderful advice applies to our children as they continue growing—not just when they're babies! (Click here if you'd like to read more of Dr. Sears' fabulous quotes.)

In all seriousness, I'm grateful there are fathers willing to sacrifice and take on the primary responsibilities of raising children. Their families will be blessed for their selfless efforts!

Please understand that I know parenting is difficult. I'm an imperfect mother and have much to work on. I know how hard staying home and raising children can be because I've been doing it for the past 15+ years! I know the feeling of "missing out" on corporate pats-on-the-back; raises; bonuses; recognition dinners; awards; certificates; new wardrobes for work; traveling abroad; adult conversation; company parties, etc. I'm intimately familiar with the feelings that come from child-induced sleepless nights; hunger pangs because I'm too busy caring for children to eat; crumby floors when I just vacuumed(!); crying fits (mainly from my children but occasionally from me! ha ha); multiple shopping trips in one day (this happened even before our children were diagnosed with celiac disease); loneliness when children return to school; endless budgeting from making it on only one income; repeatedly staring at our food, wondering what to make for dinner; driving/owning loud, old cars; never-ending laundry piles; dishes that seem to multiply overnight; chauffeuring children around until my hiney is numb...my list could go on for days! Oh, and I can't forget my postponed desires to blog on a consistent and regular basis—it's taken me a solid month to get this blog post and typographic designs published! Can you say frustrated?! Ha ha.

Here is evidence of just how tiring mothering can be:

Survival Mode Mothering, February, 2005.

Yes, that cleverly dressed young mother is me! Greg came home from work one day and busted up laughing at the spectacle of his wife—he had to take my photo! (And I'm really grateful he did. Our family's photos are priceless to me!!!) You see, at that time, my youngest son was a total mama's boy. He wouldn't let me out of his sight without wailing something fierce! Thus, I did the best I could by wearing him on my back for several hours a day. We went everywhere like this—including the grocery store! (People would just stare at me with my son on my back, my daughter in the front seat of the shopping cart, and my oldest son holding my hand.) My awesome hat was so necessary, you have no idea! My baby boy loved to play with my hair (still does!), so to keep my sanity (and my hair in its roots where it belongs!), I put my hair in a bun and a hat on top! My horrible outfit was chosen because I would get very sweaty hefting my darling son while cleaning our house and I didn't want to ruin my nicer clothes. And you have no idea how much I wanted to curl up on our couch just like my darling and sassy daughter! HA! So, do you see? I totally get how hard parenting is! :)

Yet none of those previously mentioned "difficults" will ever come between my children and me—or my husband and me, for that matter! As tiring as it is being a stay-at-home mom, I wouldn't change a smidgen of my life's greatest choice! Besides, I potentially have less than three years left before my oldest son is out of the house, and only seven years until I could be an empty-nester! Say what?! I don't know when my daughter will choose to leave home, but she said she wants to get an apartment after high school. Those thoughts blow my mind.

Thank goodness Greg and I were on the same page from our very first conversation about our potential for parenthood. How grateful I am to Greg that he supported me in my dream of stay-at-home motherhood because I would have been greatly disappointed if he would have wanted me to be the breadwinner, or have both of us work outside the home. Our lives would look completely different today if we had hired out our future, i.e., paid someone else raise our children.

I recently read this wonderful quote given by Elder D. Todd Christofferson (of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints) at the World Meeting of Families:

"I've heard it said that raising children is like growing a garden. You can’t force plants and flowers to bloom when you want, the way you want, but you can do much to provide an environment that makes flourishing likely. ...The essential element is not just what we do, but what we allow God to do through us."

Yes! We need to create a lovely, peaceful environment for our children to grow and thrive. When children feel unconditional love and safety, every important thing in their lives can fall beautifully into place!

Elder Christofferson's last sentence is key. We parents must be willing to make the necessary sacrifices that allow our Heavenly Father the opportunity to raise His children well, through us. Who better to continually love, care for and raise God's children than the parents he appointed through birth?! :) Not only do we please and honor our Heavenly Father in that wonderful process of serving our children (His children!), we absolutely become better people!

I have hope that one day the people of our world will look to the examples set by stay-at-home parents as the healthiest way to raise children and follow suit. I'd love it if parents would examine the sacrifices associated with raising children and, instead, view them as indispensable blessings: a lifetime of opportunities for self-improvement! My dreams for society might never be realized, but at least I'm living my dream and actively raising Greg's and my children 100%! :)

I truly believe there is nothing more beautiful in this world than happy traditional marriages followed immediately by glorious motherhood and fatherhood! I say to everyone:

Motherhood looks good on you!

Fatherhood looks good on you!

Reaction Time, Family Time

I had a close call last Friday night while driving north on the freeway near my home. That heart-stopping moment left me near-tears and very reflective...

Despite the smog and heat, last Friday was a lovely Utah day. Oh, how I love Utah! :) I began my day by taking my oldest son to his sophomore orientation...I can't believe he's that old! I was concerned my son would be embarrassed to be seen with his mother at orientation. I asked him if he wanted me to leave, but he was unflappable—even when a few of his friends said "hi" to him! :) It warmed my heart to see my wonderful son happy to be seen with his mother...my level of happiness was (and is) indescribable! I just love that my boy wasn't embarrassed or annoyed by me (unlike I was at that age)—he made me feel like a million bucks! :)

After we found all of my son's classes and discussed our drop-off/pick-up routine, we decided to go school clothes shopping. I was thrilled that my I-love-playing-computer-games-and-basketball-all-summer! son was willing to spend an unspecified amount of time just shopping with me! Yay! I also loved that we talked endlessly while we shopped—it made this chatty Adrie very happy! By the way, it's no surprise that my son has excellent conversation skills! ;)

At one store, my son and I were having a lively discussion about which shoes to buy for him. We had been walking between three aisles with three boxes in our arms, trying to decide between five different pairs of shoes. We must have looked pretty funny debating back and forth to each other, walking around in circles! But it was a hard decision to make, you see! We finally decided he needed two pairs of athletic shoes: one pair for "A" day and one pair for "B" day.

I didn't realize until we saw a man staring/laughing at us that we must have been quite animated and verbal in our discussion. Yet I had my reasons for standing my ground (of which shoes would be better for my darling boy), and so did my son. We do love a good debate and aren't afraid to show it! :) At any rate, I'm glad we could provide some entertainment for the day! Ha ha. In the end, we were both satisfied with his choices.

We finished our shopping and headed to the drive-through to refresh ourselves with slushies. They were so yummy! We continued talking as we drove home and just enjoyed our time together. :) When we arrived home, we ate a late lunch and continued bonding.

After my son went back to his basement computer paradise, I readied myself for my next school shopping trip by creating lists for my daughter and youngest son. I suddenly became very tired and decided to take a quick nap. An hour and twenty minutes later (not so quick!), I finally awoke at the persistence of my baby boy. Man, I was bushed!

Before my other two children and I could go school shopping again, I drove my husband to pick up our car from being repaired/inspected for registration. We then headed back to one of the stores from earlier that day to return the suitcase I bought for Greg. As much as I liked the suitcase, Greg decided it was too small for his large shoes. :) My oldest son was pleased as punch that Greg chose the large grey suitcase he suggested for Greg from the very beginning! I simply thought the grey suitcase was too big...I was wrong. (I know, you're all thinking, "How could you have been wrong?!" Ha ha.) My youngest two children and I went to three other stores to complete our shopping lists. It was a long but productive night; we were all so happy to finally be done with school shopping! I would tell you more of our shopping adventures, but we don't have all night now do we?! Ha ha. Just know that we had a good time together. :)

As we drove home, I thought about how relieved I was to be free of our back-to-school week (Yippee!), for it has been a long week of preparing, shopping, school open-houses and scheduling!

When we were almost 10 minutes from home, I noticed that a vehicle in the lane way ahead of us swerved over and back into the lane. Because of the lighting in the sky (the sun had already set and the sky was almost dark), I couldn't see anything else in the lane but the massive SUV that had swerved. I thought maybe they wanted to switch lanes and didn't realize another car was there?

I never dreamed something would actually be in our lane in just a few moments. And I never would have guessed that it would be something truly harmful. I mean, how often is there an enormous and dangerous item in the middle of the road?? (Well, enormous considering what a vehicle can handle safely running over.) We sometimes see a shredded tire, or a piece of wood, or a plastic sack, or a tumbleweed, or an item of clothing blowing across the road, etc., but those things aren't life-threatening.

I can still see our scary moment clearly in my mind. I was driving with my hands at 10 o'clock and two o'clock, thinking about our day and all that we have coming up this week. All of a sudden, there was a large metal patio chair in the middle/right side of our lane! It was laying on its side with the round base of the chair on the left, and the back of the chair pointing to the right. I loudly sucked in my breath, slammed on my brakes, swerved my car sharply to the left and went right back into our lane after I passed the chair. I had zero time to react in any other way. Thankfully, the large truck in the left lane behind us also swerved as we swerved so we didn't crash into each other.

For many seconds after our adventure ended, I kept thinking how I couldn't believe I actually missed hitting the patio chair! I was stunned I didn't crash into another car! I was ecstatic that I didn't flip our car from over-correcting to avoid the chair!

I immediately wanted to start crying, but held it together because I didn't want my youngest son and daughter to be concerned or worried. After a few seconds, my son said how he was truly afraid he was going to die. Oh, I felt so badly that my wonderful boy was so scared! :'( Thus, I was relieved when he happily said, "Good reaction time, Mom!!" His words hung in the air.

As I thought about my son's sweet words, I was immediately drawn to the fact that yes, my reaction time was (in my mind) quite impressive. I literally saw the chair for the first time as I was almost on top of it and instantly slowed our car and swerved out of harm's way. I know I was being watched over and protected by Heaven last Friday night. Yet I also know the fact that I'm in good health/shape definitely had something to do with our safety. I feel strongly that because I've been exercising consistently for such a long time now (Well, a year+ seems long to me!), my body was able to perfectly react to what my mind told it to do. I believe that because of consistent exercising, my fight or flight response is way better than it could have been had I not been "in training" for the past year.

I shudder to think what would have happened if I had hit that large metal patio chair. Would our car have been totaled? Would we have been "totaled"? Would others have been injured? The chair would have hit our car on the front end, passenger side—right where my daughter was sitting, and my son was seated right behind her! I can't stand to think of them being hurt, or worse... Any of those previous options are not anything my family can deal with right now. I'm beyond grateful we were spared any sort of accident!

Each time I've had a close call in my life, I've been given a new mindset and this near-accident is no different. Life can literally be changed—or gone entirely—in a split second! I don't like to dwell on those sad thoughts, but they are the absolute truth! Thus, I've been renewed (again) in my life's efforts. I cling to all the lessons I've learned through my various medical trials that have mostly been resolved. I also perfectly remember the sad and difficult life lessons learned through losing my family's loved ones...they are never far from my thoughts.

Life is meant to be lived! Life is about having good and healthy relationships! Our families are the most important relationships we'll ever have! Making our families eternal should be our life's greatest goal! And once our families are eternal, we must daily do our best to keep the commandments and covenants we've made with the Lord. And, when we mess up (or commit sin), we must utilize the power of the Atonement of Jesus Christ and repent. :)

When I created this typographic design two Sunday mornings ago, I thought it was just a happy, clever design for my Mia Maid class to enjoy. (And I would have been truly pleased with that result!) Little did I know that I would be creating it for my family and me! It's a sobering thought to internalize the fact that if it weren't for my fast reaction time while driving on the freeway (and thanks to the Heavenly help I received), I might not have my family time—as I know it—anymore.

I created "Family Time" with money green as the background color to illustrate that family is more important than money! :)

So today and every day, I challenge everyone—myself included:

Up your game when it comes to your family time! :) Spread your wealth (time) in the ways that really matter! Spend every bit of spare time you have with your loved ones! Better yet, repeatedly create that sacred bonding time with the people who make you you! Never let a day go by without expressing your love to your family! Tomorrow could be your last day, so fill today with love for your family!

In order to daily achieve my challenge, we must create a lasting and eternal relationship with our Heavenly Father (God) and our Savior, Jesus Christ, through the Holy Ghost. If we are truly trying our very best to daily listen to the Spirit and follow His promptings/inspiration/revelation (which is what Heavenly Father desires of/for us), we will be led, directed and helped in the ways we can best live our lives—so that we can create even more wonderful moments and memories with our families!

My family's accident-avoiding experience will stay with me for a long time. I won't take my happy family ending for granted—I'm making every moment count! :)

A Snippet From My Birth

On Christmas Day, 2014, I had a deep and wonderful conversation with my father. I was so happy my dad selflessly braved the snowy Utah roads just to come visit my little family and me—his efforts meant a lot. :)

We sat on my awkward creme, blue and tan sofa (My living room could use a new sofa, but it will have to wait!), across the room from my happy little Christmas tree. My dad and I had been talking about various family memories (my childhood family) for a while when he suddenly brought up the day of my birth. He explained how long he held my mom's hand while she wearily pushed me into this world.

As he continued his description of my mother's and my event, the light in his eyes was a wonder to behold. You see, I've talked about my own children in that way—with the love that can't be matched(!)—but I don't know if I've ever witnessed/understood it when my father talked about me in that way.

The immense love and adoration in my dad's eyes was very near tear-inducing as he shared what I looked like when the nurse handed him my little-pink-bundled self. :) He basically said (not word for word) that I was such a beautiful baby, and that he was overjoyed in the moment. :)

My dad shared that immediately after I was handed to him, I looked up at him and smiled! Surprised, I asked, "Did I really smile at you?!" My dad responded something like, "YES! You really smiled at me—first thing! Ohh, Adrie, it was amazing!" He then told of how much the nurse gushed about how beautiful I was, and how she said my parents make the most beautiful babies! (The same nurse had assisted in my older brother's birth too!)

Growing up, I loved looking at my little pink bow!

I've been pondering that moment with my father for two days now. I don't know quite how to explain what this little story has done for me, but let me assure you, it has been magical to my soul! Simply seeing the love in my father's eyes, hearing the love, excitement, and joy in his voice for me, well, it filled my heart to overflowing. Knowing that I mean as much to my father as my children mean to me was enough to make me tear up a little—and I get a little teary even now when I think back to that moment...happy tears, of course!

Please don't get me wrong, I've known my entire life that my dad absolutely loves me. As a teenager, I doubted his love for a little while because I was in such a "Don't bug me!" state, but shortly after that, I completely got my dad's love for me. This experience, however, was different. It felt special—almost heavenly. My dad's heart was so completely open to me that I felt emotion from him I've not witnessed before.

I'm so thankful I was able to experience my birth from a new and beautiful perspective. I'm beyond grateful for my parents creating me and bringing me into this world—and especially for my dear, sweet, wonderful mother! I absolutely know of her great love for me, too. I literally would not be here were it not for my parents!

If anyone is wondering what you can do for your child, please follow my father's example and share with your child how you felt on the day of their birth! Explain to them what was in your heart during that amazing time. Help them understand how precious they are to you! I promise, your child will be forever changed in a most positive way!

What I love most about this experience—besides the fact that it made me feel like a million bucks(!)—is it totally confirmed to me that Greg and I have been parenting our children in precisely the right way. For we gush about our children every chance we get!

We've hung multiple photos of our children all over our home, and provide easy access to endless photo albums and loose photos so we can revisit and remember our wonderful experiences anytime we want! Greg and I talk about our children's births with great joy, warmth, excitement and love. And we share other happy thoughts and memories with our babies every chance we get!

Some might say Greg and I have gushed too much over our precious children, but after this experience with my sweet daddy, I say no way! Based on our actions, our children could never doubt Greg's and my love for them, and that fact brings great peace to my soul. :)

Yes, Christmas, 2014, will remain forever in my memory as the day I found out that I smiled right after I was born! I love knowing I had a happy heart literally from day one!

A Follow-up to President Obama's Speech on Women and the Economy

Last week, I had a facebook encounter that I would describe as a bit unpleasant...okay, it totally burned my butter—I was smoking mad! Ha ha. Here's what happened:

I clicked on a facebook link that discussed in very short detail, President Obama's speech on women and the economy. I was dismayed when I heard his words, "Sometimes, someone—usually mom—leaves the workplace to stay home with the kids, which then leaves her earning a lower wage for the rest of her life as a result. And that's not a choice we want Americans to make." That link was the catalyst for my inclusion of his words in my blog post Self-Reliance. I "liked" the facebook post and left a comment, sharing my disgust. As you can tell from my blog post, I was very upset at his words!

*By the by, I debated editing Self-Reliance, but decided to leave it as-is and write this post instead. You know, because, life is life! Our reactions are human and we can't completely erase how we feel like we can delete our words on a computer, we can only move forward!

Later, I saw through my facebook notifications that some other people disagreed with the initial facebook post. They shared that Pres. O wasn't attacking stay-at-home moms, and the comment was taken out of context. Thus, even though I had initially watched a majority of the video, I went back and watched the entire video. Yes, in a broad sense, I understood that he wasn't attacking stay-at-home moms and I appreciate that. Yet I feel he totally downplayed the importance of stay-at-home motherhood and I absolutely take issue with that—which is why I left my self-reliance blog post as-is.

I then left a lengthy response to those facebook comments. Before I commented, I prayed a lot and thought very long and hard about what to write. I felt really good about my words! :) (I might write a version of my comment in a blog post sometime in the future.)

However, the next morning, there were follow-up comments to my comment, and I could tell that they didn't agree with my position. I was frustrated because I felt that they weren't even trying to understand my point, so I deleted my "like" and two comments on the facebook post. I felt much better after having done so because my emotions were being negatively affected. And I know I shouldn't let people bug me, but again, I'm human. Without going into too much detail, just know that some of the comments weren't from random strangers, but my extended family members. Thus, it was hard feeling misunderstood by the people I'm attached to for life!

I was also ready to deactivate my facebook account and just keep my blog's facebook page active. I sadly realized facebook would also deactivate my Enthusiastic Fantastic page if I deleted my personal page, so I left everything open and decided to take a facebook break. However, that night, I read an amazing article, Difference and Dignity, by the Mormon Newsroom, that calmed my troubled heart. I highly recommend reading it! :)

So after all of my blabbing, what it comes down to is this: Many people in this world—including President Obama—are passionate about women's rights. I don't want anyone thinking I disagree with supporting women because I completely, utterly, and unequivocally support women's rights! I totally agree that men and women should be treated with equal rights and respect in absolutely every and any situation!

But I am even more passionate about children's rights because, until they are grown, children are helpless in the life situations they find themselves in! Children have zero input as to what their child-rearing choices are, and I have a problem with that. For I feel that if children were given a voice, they would say they want to be home with their mothers. I sincerely want what's best for children, and I believe daycare/babysitters/schools are not the answer. Mothers are the answer! There I go again...it's just so hard for me to stop! ;)

Thus, today, I was thrilled beyond description to stumble upon this article in the Deseret News National edition, 6 things you should understand about stay-at-home moms, by Herb Scribner. I love how Mr. Scribner points out the immense value that stay-at-home mothers bring to our society. And he has solid research to back-up every single one of his points!!!

Thank you, Herb Scribner, for sharing your wisdom with the world! This supremely happy stay-at-home mama and her children appreciate your words more than you will ever know!

To wrap-up, I must share an interesting tidbit that happened to me this past Thursday night. I had a conversation with some wonderful women who were kindly trying to convince me to go back to school, i.e., a university/college. I've researched this idea previously and had decided against it, but after talking with them, I decided to look into it again.

As I researched the universities near me, I was overcome with emotion. I realized that most of the programs I was interested in pursuing would cause me to go be gone while my children were home. Just thinking about going back to school while my children are living at home literally made made me cry. Thinking of missing out on any time with my children—when they choose to be home and engaged with me—made my soul feel like it was being twisted and pulled to the point it would break into a million pieces.

No, I am most definitely not ready to go back to school. Unless things change significantly for my family, i.e., a tragedy befalls us and I'm forced to reenter society's workplace, I will not return to professional employment, either. And I still make that statement even though my family could really use the additional money for our budget!

Mothering my children is my greatest joy and most important calling! Below is a poem that perfectly describes my feelings. I had tears the first time I read it! And now, I must be on my way...I hope you enjoy your day!

*I mean no copyright infringement by sharing this from Belle Bébés, and I couldn't find a copyright statement anywhere on their website.