What Are We to Learn From This?

Hello, it's me! Yes, I'm still here nearly 11 months after my previous blog post! I actually began writing this post in February 2020—before the unbelievable COVID-19 pandemic put our entire planet on hold. Then there was the little matter of the 5.7 earthquake and thousands of aftershocks we've experienced here in Utah. And now we're watching protests galore unfold across America and some parts of the world. 😢

To some, this post might seem a little odd to share at this point in our history. Yet I'm publishing what I wrote anyway because I took the time to write it, and I enjoy remembering our lives pre-pandemic, pre-earthquake, and pre need for current protests—because, yes, I dearly wish there were no racism, no inequality, and no injustice anywhere in our world! I want everyone to feel safe, secure, protected, loved, cared for, etc. 😔

Before I continue, please rest assured that everything is great in my little world. 😁 I am so happy, healthy, and loving my days at home with my husband and children! My life is truly beautiful! That said, let's take a little trip to where I've been for the past several years outside of my happy life with Greg and our adorable children...

There's no easy way to start this, so I'll just dive in: In September 2019, my one and only mother married a man that I've never met! And she specifically chose not to tell any of her children, extended family members, or friends that she was going to marry him! 😱 My mom never told a single soul about her wedding plans outside of the man she married and the Nauvoo Temple staff!

There were no cleverly worded invitations, no exciting wedding preparations for my mother's children, grandchildren, sons-in-law, daughter-in-law, siblings, etc., to be involved with. There was no beautiful wedding experience, no reception, nor any kind of happy celebration to enjoy for the people who love and support her. There were no cheesy, adoring, or artistic photos snapped. There are no videos of the "blessed day" to be enjoyed or laughed at by my mother's posterity. There hasn't been any sort of anything that we could happily post to any of our social media accounts. That said, my mom's new husband's family threw them a marriage celebration in Hawaii a few months after their wedding—but none of my mom's family or extended family were invited...including not me. 😢

I found out that my mom married said-man-that-I've-never-met eight days after her wedding and sealing was finalized in the Nauvoo Temple! Adding insult to injury, I found out about my mom's wedding/sealing from my sister—and my sister found out all of that information through a text that my mom sent to my sister and brother! 😣 In my mom's somewhat-defense, she emailed me about her wedding/sealing the very next day after she texted my brother and sister. My mom claims that technology issues were to blame as to why I didn't receive her life-altering text, but the situation hurt my heart more than I can ever express. Because—Hello!—a phone call would have been nice!!! Even now as I read what I wrote, I still cannot believe that my mother did all of that!

Prior to her new marriage, my mom lived off-and-on in her now-husband's house (she had her own separate bedroom) in a different state from us, for about four+ years. So my siblings and I were dealing with all of those continuing challenges even before our mother's unsettling elopement.

While I won't go into great detail, just know that my mom and I were extremely close emotionally speaking before all of this happened. Unfortunately, things have absolutely not been the same between my mother and me since October 2013. It's been such a rough six+ years, you have no idea! I could go on and on and on with maddening details of my childhood family's situation. I could literally write for endless hours about the frustrations, turmoil, heartache, bad dreams, etc., that my mother's actions have caused. I'm sorry if this is too vague for some of you, but there are many things that are too private to share...just don't let your imagination get the better of you.

Suffice it to say, after praying, studying, and researching innumerable articles, podcast episodes, videos, devotionals, and books by wonderful licensed therapists, happy life coaches, amazing religious/spiritual leaders, incredible motivational speakers, uplifting TED Talks, inspiring holy scripture verses, etc., and talking things through with my childhood family and extended family members, friends, and especially my most precious husband, Greg 💖, I am finally at a point where I'm able to somewhat deal with my mother's new life. *But I'll never support nor condone her actions of marrying without including anyone in her joyful occasion besides her new husband. #noiwillnot! 😒

All of that said (yes, there's more 😅) I will never be able to fully express how devastating my mother's actions have been to me, nor can I adequately convey how difficult it was for me to get through those first four+ months after my mom's elopement. And I thought the previous five+ years had been rough! Ha! Unfortunately, they were just the prelude to my childhood family's new reality that repeatedly smacked us in the face like a dying fish out of water! 🎣

While I'm thankful I've mostly turned the corner in terms of coming to accept the shocking reality of my mom's new life—and trying to get used to the spoken-and-unspoken conditions that have been established by her (many of which I absolutely don't agree with)—getting to this point was only possible because of untold hours of researching, listening, talking, writing, praying, and many tears. Even after all of that work, it was only after I realized that I had a version of relationship PTSD—that those in the psychology world define as mother wounds—that I was finally able to pick myself up and start moving forward. I'm so thankful I was finally able to begin grieving my mother and find a way to "deal" with her choices!

Yet as much as I thought I've been making great progress these past additional four+ months, just three nights ago, I had a doozy of a dream that showed just how much my subconscious is still struggling big time with my mother's new life. I was stunned at how revealing and truth-filled my dream was! It makes me tear up when I think about it—but again, I must keep moving forward.

Even last week, my brother, sister, and I had a group text going where we shared our grief at missing our mom and wondering when we would ever get to see her in person again—and it has nothing to do with the COVID-19 pandemic restrictions, as our mother and her new husband are vacationing in another state...that is not where her children live!

To illustrate just how much mothers mean to their children throughout their entire lives, please read this section from The Science of Happiness Podcast, Episode 66—it's a great listen:

Rebecca Vitali-DeCola: My father’s mother died in childbirth with him. And in our first set of questions, there was a question about, like, if you could change one thing about your childhood... ...Anything about the way you were raised. What would it be?

Joe DeCola: My mom. Yeah. I really think she would have been really an interesting woman.

Rebecca Vitali-DeCola: Yeah.

Joe DeCola: And a really good thing in my life.

.....

Rebecca Vitali-DeCola: [His mom] was so central in his narrative. There was a moment, and I think in set three, I think where it’s like, "If your apartment is burning and you can get all the people you love out and pets out of it, but you had to, like, go back for one material item, one possession. Like, what would you run back for in a fire?" And he said "This, you know, photograph I have of my mom." And yeah, I mean, I just kept crying. I could not stop crying, listening to him talk. And I didn’t know that. I mean, and that’s very significant. So, yeah, that was a revelation. It was just really poignant. He’s you know, he’s 82 and he never met her. And she still occupies such an important part of his life and consciousness.

Oh, how that story tugs at my heart strings! 😥 It's amazing that an 82-year-old man can still miss his mother that much! It makes me feel better knowing that my siblings and I aren't the only ones who are so attached to their mom. Mothers and fathers really do make the world go 'round!

Obviously, there are many sides to every story. My mom has her version of her dating/marriage story, too. My entire childhood family and my mom's siblings each have their individual perspectives about what occurred with my mom's new relationship and marriage.

*So, to anyone reading this blog post, just know that I dealt with my mom's situation in the best ways I knew how—and I was always trying to improve myself while processing everything! I tried so very hard throughout the past six+ years to do and be the best that I could for my parents, siblings, and myself. Regardless of anyone else's life experiences, no one can ever fully understand what I've been through, so I hope you will proceed with compassion and empathy toward me. My broken heart thanks you. 😔

While working through my issues with my mom's elopement and her new marriage, I pondered various coping mechanisms I could utilize. One of the best ways for me to process life is by writing. Yes, journal writing is always a great idea, but blogging is my absolute favorite! 💛

Thus, I felt a strong desire to share my thoughts and feelings about my "mother issues" through my blog. I even drafted a few blog posts about my mom and her situation over the past year+ (including before she eloped), but they remain unpublished. After being reprimanded by my sister because she felt a blog post about nearly everything in our situation was too hurtful, I decided to do more research.

Not publishing my previous blog drafts about my mother and her dating/marriage situation was probably a good idea. It's no surprise that I can be feisty and "cutting" with my words if I want to. Most of the time, my words are lovely, uplifting, and kind. But I was so emotionally hurt by my mother that I was more than ready to let my pain and suffering explode like words spewing from the Hoover Dam! #noshame! Oh, the stories I could tell would make your head spin! Even though it would have felt really great to unload my feelings like that, it's probably best that I didn't publish my explosive sentences! 😄

While researching, I was so happy to read in several online sources that many experts state that sharing our personal stories is super helpful for each of us. Sharing our stories really does make us better people and might even help others learn something new in the process! I immediately felt relief and decided to compose a blog post that served not only my emotional healing, but one that could possibly help prevent others from making some of the mistakes I've endured (due to others' choices) over the past several years. Yay for story sharing days! 😁

By the way, it feels incredibly great to finally be blogging again! 👏🏻 I've wanted to blog about endless topics over the past few years, but I was so torn up inside about the situation with my mom that I just couldn't go there. Plus, I spent quite a bit of my free time trying to process everything, so I truly didn't have it in me to blog about all of my issues until now. I'm so happy to be posting on Enthusiastic Fantastic again! 😁

Here's what I've learned from my childhood family's issues—from my earliest memories, to literally today—in no particular order:

• If you are a parent, you must be the parent for your child no matter how old you or your child are. Don't "reverse" the roles of parent and child! Every child needs and deserves their parents until the day they die. Even in the afterlife (I believe in the postmortal spirit world), parents should be watching over and helping their children to the extent possible. I truly believe the role of parent continues throughout eternity. *A sweet example of parents always being there for their children in the proper parenting roles was shown in episode 10, season 6 of Madam Secretary. Stevie (First Daughter) is sitting between her parents, Elizabeth (Madam President) and Henry (First Gentleman), in the presidential limousine on the way to her wedding:

Elizabeth: So sweet of you, by the way, to drive with Dad and me. That means a lot. It's very sweet. Thank you.

Stevie: Yeah, well, I, um...I thought that it would give us a chance to talk.

Henry: Absolutely, What's on your mind?

Elizabeth: Listen, sweetheart, no matter how old you get or how many kids of your own you have, you can always come to us with anything, about anything.

The scene continues in funny banter between spouses, parents, and child, but it fully illustrates the point that parents should remain a significant, devoted source of comfort, safety, and love throughout their child's life. *As a side note, I'm super bummed that Madam Secretary was canceled! ☹

• Regardless of how your child is acting/behaving, you must always show up as your child's parent! Unless a parent has a significant impairment that prevents them from understanding that they are a parent, parents should always rise above and be the good parent their child deserves. *If you have questions as to how to be a good parent, take the necessary time to learn, be humble enough to make needed changes, and then continually put forth your best efforts to become the wonderful parent your child deserves. It's never too late! Start today! Change happens the instant you decide!
• Realize how incredibly important you are to your child. There is nothing that can ever replace the importance of a parent in a child's life. Parents are absolutely paramount! Of course, nearly every child will one day create their own life, but they still need their parents no matter their age or the level of success they achieve!
• Create good, healthy relationships and support systems within your family, friends, and community. Then, when you're struggling—because we all struggle at times throughout our lives—make sure you reach out to that support system you've created to help you work through your issues. Never put your child in the role of "therapist" unless they are a fully grown adult who is happily established in their own life. Even then, use caution with how much you rely on your child; keep your child as your first priority in your relationship with them. If you're really in a jam and can't seem to unscramble the mess, find a well-credentialed therapist who will help you figure everything out—it will benefit you, your entire family, and your posterity.
• Give your loved ones a heads up if you are going to elope! There is never any excuse good enough to justify not sharing your upcoming wedding news with those closest to you. That doesn't mean you need to include people in your wedding day specifically, you can totally have a private wedding, but you should definitely clue them in as to what's about to happen! *I recently read this lovely story about an older couple that found true love during the COVID-19 pandemic. I ate up every word about the darling couple and daydreamed about how amazing it would have been if my mom had simply given me the opportunity to somehow be involved in her engagement and wedding. 😢
• Do your utmost best in choosing your spouse. Look at every characteristic possible to determine if you two are a match. Spend ample time fully communicating about everything relevant to your future marriage and family. Don't leave any topic to chance! You don't want to discover a deal-breaker after you've already made the serious, life-changing commitment to your spouse. Then, do everything within your power to help create and sustain a happy, loving, long-term marriage and family! Marriage depends on both spouses continually giving their very best to each other—including forgiveness! 💛
• Unless there is abuse happening, stay married to your chosen spouse! Love each other wholeheartedly, unselfishly, and unconditionally throughout this life and into the next! Your first spouse should be your only spouse! Divorce should be your very last option after every other resource has been exhausted. Only resort to divorce if your marriage is truly "dead" beyond recovery. For further thoughts on this, please read this wonderful talk, "Divorce," by Dallin H. Oaks. *I fully understand there are certain situations that warrant divorce. I'm not saying that divorce should never happen. I'm just saying that every couple should try their very best to make their marriage happy, healthy, and loving, and then stay married!

So, where am I emotionally today? Well, I'm feeling a lot better compared to the emotional "bomb" I experienced in September, 2019, that's for darn sure! Obviously, blogging isn't the perfect answer to work through issues, by any means, but writing out and sharing my story has definitely helped—so thank you for reading! 😊

I still haven't met my new stepfather (not even virtually or via phone call!) and I don't know if or when that will happen. That feeling totally sucks, but I'm getting used to it. I know...that's complete and utter craziness, but it's the truth.

Now, on to a few happier things:

The fantastic news is, I've paid to have my domain name remain active for Enthusiastic Fantastic through 2029! Woohoo and yippee skippee! I find great satisfaction in knowing that my blog will live on for at least another nine+ years—it gives me true joy! 🤩

And I must share these happy photos that my children took of Greg and me on Mother's Day, 2020! My children know that one of the very best gifts they can give me are photos! 📸 Greg, our three darlings, and I spent quite a bit of time posing and taking photos as my main Mother's Day gift. We had the best time together! 💛💙🧡💚💜

I'm so very thankful for my amazing family—that literally exists because Greg and I fell eternally in love! 😍 Greg and I are 100% committed and faithful to each other, and I'm beyond grateful that our family reaps the benefits of our happy, healthy marriage every single day!

Greg & Adrie Peterson 💙💛 05/10/2020 🥰

Greg and I were acting like robots for this one! #robotdancers! Ha ha 😂

*02/15/2021—Update:

Things are getting a tiny bit better in my childhood family. I've had a smidgen of contact with my new stepfather—both through kind holiday/birthday cards and gifts, and a couple of text messages. But no, I still haven't met him in person, nor have I talked with him over the phone or even virtually. I really don't know if or when any of that will ever happen, and it's confusing.

My mom and I have had several more talks via phone call and the Marco Polo app; we're working on this new normal of our family dynamic. I'm bummed I haven't seen her in one-and-a-half years, and I don't know if/when I'll see her in person again. 😔 Overall, it's still a difficult situation for me, but the difficulty has lessened a little as time passes. I wish I had better news for this unbelievable situation, but it is what it is!

Blogging for Conflict Resolution

You might have noticed that I've put off blogging for quite a while. As I described in my previous post, I've been very busy. Yet at the same time, I've tried to analyze myself and figure out why I've not been blogging like I truly desire. I finally realized that I haven't made blogging a priority because I've been having some issues with my extended family. It's difficult to write that here on my blog—a wonderful public space I've created for myself, but it's true.

I've struggled mightily over the past several months due to feelings of frustration and sadness over a lack of closeness between myself and some extended family members—both in my family and Greg's family, but especially mine. And no matter how much time has gone by, or how many efforts of goodwill I've extended, those issues frustratingly remain to some degree, or another.

I've been greatly misjudged on many levels, which tears at my soul! So many times I've found myself tearing up saying, "I can't believe they honestly thought that way about me! I can't believe they didn't think to ask me about the real story! I can't believe they wouldn't call to talk to me in person instead of jumping to such conclusions based on hearsay! —because we all know what gossip and judging without actually talking with the person you've been offended by does.

I'm such a happy person—it's true! 😀 I live my life very well—exactly how I desire! 😁 So when you love people as much as I do and some of the very important people in your life misjudge you and put you into a category that you don't belong, well, it feels horrible. Of course, I'm the type who will happily keep going about my life, day in and day out, without letting someone curb my enthusiasm, but that doesn't mean their actions don't affect me—especially when I care deeply about said souls!

I won't go into the nitty-gritty details because there's no point. Suffice it to say, my heart has squeezed with sadness more than once over the past several months. Forgiveness has taken on an entirely new meaning to me! I've forgiven everyone, but I don't know and can't tell if they've forgiven me, or not—which is a struggle to my soul that I consciously and continually push away. I keep striving my best every day to say and do the Christlike right things, but that doesn't mean my heart doesn't still twinge with tears.

I don't know if any of you have experienced anything like this before (and I'm sorry I'm not being more specific), but, to me, it feels like no matter what I say or do (or said or did), those select extended family members have placed me in the new classification of "other," or "no longer welcome," which feels terrible—and it seems as if there's no way for me to be reclassified! 😞

So. What I've been trying to do is learn from these torturous feelings. I've tried valiantly to see where other people are coming from—even if their actions/words don't make sense to me. And, I've let my extended family members "go," to the extent possible—which is unbelievably hard for me, but I let go because I love them.

I'm hoping that by finally writing about my issues here, I will feel better and be able to move on. I love writing so much(!)—it works wonders for my soul! Thus, it's been difficult when I've felt that I can't speak of my situation (my truth!) here on Enthusiastic Fantastic because someone might misinterpret my words—which is why I stayed away from blogging for such a long time in the first place. But that ends right now with my version of conflict resolution—or, what I like to call "Blogging for Conflict Resolution"!  I think it should be the hip new call to action, don't you?! Ha ha. 😃

Now I'm going to share what I'm thankful for...and just know that these thoughts relate somehow to the situations I described previously—meaning the lack of those actions, too. Did any of that make sense?! 😄

In no particular order, I'm truly thankful for:

• genuine smiles
• looking me in the eye
• happy hugs
• questions asked in a kind and truthful manner
• "likes" 💖 and comments on my Instagram posts
• continuing to follow my Instagram accounts (I absolutely love my Instagram world I've created!)
• responding to texts and emails I've sent
• giving me the benefit of the doubt
• not jumping to conclusions
• talking to me directly instead of gossiping about me
• loving me and liking me 😊 (you know, because families must love each other even if they don't like each other very much)
• desiring to understand where I'm coming from
• sharing time and energy with me
• having a willingness to listen to what I have to say
• valuing my thoughts and opinions
• acknowledging that I have something to contribute
• respecting my differing opinions
• recognizing boundaries and not overstepping
• staying connected to me even though we see things differently
• sharing your world with me even though it looks vastly different from mine
• not being jealous of my happy life
• recognizing that I consistently work very hard to have my wonderful life
• acknowledging that my happy, wonderful life isn't easy—unlike others who have misjudged it as such
• being genuinely happy for the amazing and endlessly-loving eternal marriage that Greg and I have created together
• appreciating my sincere endeavors to make this world a better place without labeling me as a "show off," or a "bragger"
• accepting my true friendship efforts with the intent they were offered
• letting go of any resentment or anger directed towards me

Now I'd like to share some lovely quotes I've really appreciated over the past few weeks—they've helped me tremendously!

Remember: "Despite how open, peaceful, and loving you attempt to be, people can only meet you as deeply as they've met themselves." – Matt Kahn 

That genius quote deserved a typographic design of its very own! I really enjoyed creating this one! 🌲

"Being positive in a negative situation is not naive, it's leadership." – Ralph Marston 

"There's a common denominator in our human experience... Everybody wants to know: Did you hear me, and did what I say matter?" – Oprah Winfrey

With that, please enjoy these inspiring lyrics from "I'll Begin Again," by Leslie Bricusse, in the movie musical Scrooge. Yes, I'm totally applying these wonderful thoughts to myself, but I truly believe they should live in all of our hearts every day of our lives! 😇

I'll begin again
I will build my life
I will live to know
That I fulfilled my life
I'll begin today
Throw away the past
And the future I build
Will be something that will last  

I will take the time
I have left to live
And I will give it all
That I have left to give
I will live my days
For my fellow men
And I'll live in praise
Of that moment when
I was able to begin again  

I will start anew
I will make amends
And I'll make quite certain
That the story ends
On a note of hope
On a strong amen
And I'll thank the world
And remember when
I was able to begin again

I absolutely love this inspired version by the Mormon Tabernacle Choir!

Lastly, I know this is not one of my most enthusiastic fantastic posts, but it's where I've been for quite a long time, and I felt the need to share. So, thank you for making it this far with me! Your reading efforts are greatly appreciated! I hope you have a wonderful day! 💙💛

Pesky Pernicious Perilous Pride

Have you ever thought or said any of the following phrases?

"Can you even believe they said that to me?!"

"I can't believe they did that to me!"

"Who do they think they are?!"

"They can't say that to me!"

"They can't treat me like that!"

I have. Each and every time one of those phrases entered my mind, I felt completely justified in my annoyance, anger and hurt...until now.

You see, I recently found myself in the middle of a few interactions that helped me finally understand why there is so much written about pride in the scriptures. (A simple search of the word pride on LDS.org returns 119 references in the scriptures and scriptural helps.) The basic warning that covers it all is found throughout the scriptures: "...beware of pride..." It might sound strange to some, but up until a while ago, I didn't worry that much about pride.

As I reflected on those prideful interactions, I found it super interesting to remember my 2015 fascination with President Ezra Taft Benson's marvelous lesson about pride. I highly recommend reading or listening to Chapter 18: "Beware of Pride,"  Teachings of Presidents of the Church: Ezra Taft Benson, (2014), 229–40. I listened to his lesson (while getting ready for the day) at least nine or 10 times this year—probably more, but I lost count! I'm sure I'll listen to his lesson again.

Knowing what I know now from my recent encounters, I know I was inspired by the Holy Ghost to listen to President Benson's brilliant words. I needed his advanced tutelage in order to prepare me for those prideful and somewhat hurtful interactions. And yet, even as I write about the hurt, I know that pride is what allowed me to feel hurt in the first place. Oh, the irony!

It is the strangest thing for me to finally and wholly internalize that being offended has everything to do with pride.

Please don't laugh at me for coming late to the pride-knowledge party, for I truly never thought about pride in that context before—that is, until others let me know I offended them in some way.

I won't go into details of the instances that spurred this post, but suffice it to say, apparently (at times), my personality has been offensive to others. To find out that information was shocking, unexpected and totally disheartening. Yet as I thought back on my life, I realized that that idea was not new—which astounded me! For I never, ever purposely tried to offend or hurt anyone.

Over the past several weeks, I've tried not to dwell on those surprising, revealing, painful and pride-filled interactions, but I admit, they entered my mind from time to time. After all, I'm only human. I didn't let those unhappy thoughts linger in my happy mind—I pushed them out as quickly as they came, but sometimes they recurred. I tried not to beat myself up over mistakes made throughout my life, but sometimes I shuddered at the thought that anyone could take such offense at my words and actions—or lack thereof!

Despite my social blunders, thankfully, I've come to understand the following:

1. When someone is offended by me, their pride is taking over—and vice versa.
2. Another person's pride is none of my business—and vice versa.
3. I cannot spend my days worrying that someone might be offended by me, for pride is (or will be) a problem for everyone at some time in their life, or another. Thus, it's nearly a guarantee that someone will be offended by me, no matter what I say or do. Besides, constant censoring of oneself is not only tiring, but it hinders a soul's growth.
4. When it's been pointed out to me that I've offended someone (unknowingly), sincerely apologizing and changing my ways (to the extent possible) is the only thing I can do. It's completely up to the other person whether they want to forgive me, or not.
5. I will continue to freely apologize any time someone is offended by me. I wish those instances would stop, but knowing my "offensive" track record, I can't see that they will completely disappear. Refer back to point three. :)
6. No matter how much I want to fretfully worry about my varied social faux pas, I must accept that I can't undo what has been done. It is what it is.
7. When I have been enlightened by someone as to the errors of my ways, I should not allow their sad words to stay in my thoughts and further hurt my heart.
8. If I allow myself to be hurt or offended by someone else's words, my pride is taking over.
9. I must learn from prideful situations, forgive others and move on. *That doesn't mean I forgive the person/people and then foolishly allow myself to be put in harm's way again. No. It means I let the incident go; stop talking about it; protect myself from future incidents; and pray for strength to happily continue moving forward! :)

There are many great quotes about pride that I must share from Chapter 18: "Beware of Pride," Teachings of Presidents of the Church: Ezra Taft Benson, {2014}, 229–40:

"Pride does not look up to God and care about what is right. It looks sideways to man and argues who is right. ... 

"Pride is characterized by 'What do I want out of life?’ rather than by 'What would God have me do with my life?' It is self-will as opposed to God’s will. It is the fear of man over the fear of God. 

"Humility responds to God’s will—to the fear of His judgments and to the needs of those around us. To the proud, the applause of the world rings in their ears; to the humble, the applause of heaven warms their hearts."

However, this good quote made my heart sink:

"Pride is a very misunderstood sin, and many are sinning in ignorance. In the scriptures there is no such thing as righteous pride—it is always considered a sin."

Um, yeah... After reading those words, I felt like I was the pride equivalent of "Cher" on Clueless—which is probably no surprise to some! ;)

Here are two more important quotes from President Benson's lesson:

"God will have a humble people. Either we can choose to be humble or we can be compelled to be humble. Alma said, 'Blessed are they who humble themselves without being compelled to be humble.' (Alma 32:16.) ...Let us choose to be humble. We can do it. I know we can."

"We must cleanse the inner vessel by conquering pride. (See Alma 6:2–4; Matthew 23:25–26.) ...We must yield 'to the enticings of the Holy Spirit,' put off the prideful 'natural man,' become 'a saint through the atonement of Christ the Lord,' and become 'as a child, submissive, meek, humble.' (Mosiah 3:19; see also Alma 13:28.)"

As I internalized that the remedy for pride is humility, I felt like there was no hope for me—for I am a very strong-willed (And physically strong! Ha ha.), outspoken, opinionated, energetic and exuberant lady! Hi! Enthusiastic Fantastic, anyone?! ;)

I felt like I would be in "eternal" trouble for just being who I am because, apparently, some (or many?) people perceive my personality as prideful—even though I don't view myself as prideful. I worried that because others view me as prideful, perhaps our Heavenly Father views me in the same sad light?? My thought process might sound strange, but it's how I felt.

Nevertheless, as I re-listened to President Benson's lesson, my thoughts continually drifted back to this glorious quote (below) that was given to President Benson by his eternal and lovely wife, Flora Amussen Benson. I say "given" because Sister Benson's words truly are a gift!

"Don't worry about the world's opinion of you as long as you're right with the Lord."

Thank you, Flora, for your words are precisely what my heart needed! :)

In my mind, everything I've done in my life—albeit imperfectly—has been within the bounds our Heavenly Father has set. In other words: I've followed our Savior Jesus Christ and His teachings to the very best of my ability.

Like our Savior, everything I do revolves around our Heavenly Father's will. I'm not 100% successful at following His will all the time, but, day in and day out, I am trying my best to do what is right. Thankfully, the Atonement of Jesus Christ makes up the difference for what I am unable to accomplish. Truly, if I'm right with the Lord, nothing else matters.

What further helped heal my wounded heart is this fabulous quote:

"But humility does not mean weakness. It does not mean timidity; it does not mean fear. [We] can be humble and also fearless. [We] can be humble and also courageous. Humility is the recognition of our dependence upon a higher power, a constant need for the Lord's support..." – Chapter 22: "Carrying the Gospel to the World," Teachings of Presidents of the Church: Ezra Taft Benson, (2014), 275–86

Can I get a hallelujah?! Because, yes, I freely and fully recognize that I am completely dependent upon the Lord. Yet in that same breath, I know I can continue being strong, fearless and courageous in my life—and I have the Lord's blessing in doing so, as long as I follow Him! :)

I will "ponder the path of my feet" and proceed with my daily endeavors to rid my soul of that pesky pernicious perilous pride. I'll willingly continue traveling along our Savior's path throughout eternity!

P.S. Aren't words so much fun?! :)

What "Be Prepared" Means to Me

Please note that I actually wrote this blog post yesterday (Wednesday, April 15th), but I didn't have time to publish it because I was creating my typographic designs to go with it. :)

This morning began like every other morning: wake up at 7:00; wake up my uber-tired junior-high-aged children; take my thyroid pill with a huge glass of water; change into my favorite yellow and grey comfy-cozies; make my children's gluten-free lunches; drive my beautiful daughter and handsome son to school; breathe deeply as I drive home (I strongly dislike others' lame driving skills!); wake up my youngest sleeping child and tell him the weather report—so he can choose what to wear; eat a breakfast of champions (Frosted Mini-Wheats...my absolute favorite!); sit by my adorable baby boy on the couch for a few minutes while he watches NetFlix; check Instagram while my darling boy brushes his teeth; tell my sweet son it's time to leave for school; ask my Gregor if he's coming with us; drive to school; drive home, go inside, wish I could go back to sleep; put in my contacts; do my oral-cleansing routine; make Greg's and my bed look puffy and peaceful; call my sweet mama and talk on the phone with while I do dishes; hang up the phone; remove the yummy clothes from the dryer (Clean laundry is one of my most favorite smells ever!); switch the wet laundry from the washer to the dryer; watch a few minutes of a fascinating "House" episode (I absolutely l.o.v.e. that show! I would be completely thrilled to meet Hugh Laurie one day. I also love the fact that Mr. Laurie is still married to his original/first/only wife—and they have three children!)...

That's when things became not like every other morning: our home phone rang.

As I walked over to answer the phone, I thought about how I was surprised the phone rang because we don't usually get many phone calls during the day, and I had already talked with my mom. It was Greg's dad calling, so I gave the phone to Greg (he worked from home today). Greg and his dad don't talk on the phone too often, but they have a great relationship so I wasn't surprised he called.

Sadly, it wasn't the kind of phone conversation anyone wants to receive. Greg's dad said his (Greg's) Aunt Carol died suddenly from a heart attack this morning around 7:00. Even as I write that, I can't believe it's really true. Aunt Carol was the baby sister of Greg's amazing mom. Both of these wonderful, sweet, kind, funny and feisty women died entirely too soon. None of our family members were ready to see them go! I wish we would have been able to keep Anne and Carol until they were in their nineties! Sadly, I don't always get what I wish...

I found it highly interesting that just last week, I had a dream about Greg's darling mom. In my dream, Greg and I walked into a room filled with his immediate and (a few) extended family members. Some of them were casually sitting on a queen-sized white bed, and some of them were standing around. Everyone was casually chatting in smallish groups, but also together as a whole group. I looked directly at Anne and very surprisingly said, "Oh my goodness, HI!!! Can everybody see you?! Or, is it just me?!"—you know, because Anne is no longer with us. Anne smiled with her familiar twinkle and cheerfully said, "Yes, they can all see me too!"

In my dream, I realized what a special treat it was for us to be able to see Anne and spend time with her again. After Anne's and my initial conversation, everybody settled in, happily talking with each other. It was so awesome to just be in Anne's presence. Her entertaining personality was—as always—larger than life! Anne was just so delightful and fun to be with. In my dream we all joyfully conversed for a long time, but then I woke up. :(

Even though I was sad I saw Anne only in a dream, I felt so peaceful and happy! I knew this wasn't an ordinary dream. I knew it was a dream of comfort not only for me, but it was also meant for Greg and his family. The only problem was, I felt a little silly sharing my dream with his entire family because I wasn't sure what they would think. So, I only shared it with Greg and his sister when she "randomly" called me last Friday to chat for a few minutes. Remember though, there are no coincidences!

So this morning as I thought back to the happy dream I had less than a week ago, I realized that my Anne dream was helping prepare me for a sad today. Even though we are heartbroken to have to say goodbye to our lovely Aunt Carol—who also happens to remind us of Greg's splendid mother, Anne, we absolutely know that both of their spirits live on!

The only two positives I can think about today's news are: 1) Aunt Carol has been reunited with her beautiful sister, whom she dearly missed; and 2) Anne and Carol are with our Heavenly Father, and our Savior, Jesus Christ—and the rest of humankind who have departed this earthly life. Here is one of my favorite scriptures that mirrors my thoughts—it gives me little tears every time I read it!

"...[T]he spirits of all men [and women], as soon as they are departed from this mortal body...whether they be good or evil, are taken home to that God who gave them life." – Alma 40:11

No, dear readers, my happy Anne dream was not meant just for me. It was a beautiful reminder that even though our lives are relatively short in the grand scheme of things, we are not left here all alone. Let me repeat: we are most definitely not alone in our lives! No matter our circumstances, we have sweet, heavenly angels watching over each one of us, reaching out to us when we need them!

After thinking about this morning's life-changing events, I called my mom again. We chatted for a few minutes before she needed to attend to my nephew. I hung up and had a good cry about Aunt Carol. When I finished crying, I called my dad. We had a nice conversation that went on for quite a while. I made sure both my parents know how much I love them, and how grateful I am that they are still living healthily and doing so well. Life is such a gift! :)

Throughout today I've had recurring thoughts about being prepared. I've decided to expound on what "Be Prepared" means to me.

Being prepared usually implies we should have many physical objects that will enable us to continue living in the event of an emergency or a catastrophe. We talk of food storage, water, flashlights, soap, gas, generators, 72-hour kits, bedding, first-aid kits, clothing, shoes, medication, oral care, visual aids (i.e., contacts and glasses—not technology, ha ha.), sunscreen, health/life/homeowners/renters/auto insurance, etc. If we're talking about outdoor adventures, the be prepared list grows significantly.

I fully agree it's important to work on gaining emergency supplies for the benefit of our families and friends, but I see the most vital element in being prepared in terms of relationships, for they—and our memories and knowledge—are truly the only things we take with us when we depart this earthy life.

Yes, even though we don't know when the moment will come, we must daily prepare to meet our maker. Every one of us must carefully evaluate right now to see if we are doing what it takes to have confidence when meeting God, our Heavenly Father, and His Son, Jesus Christ. We'll never know exactly when we'll be chosen to go to the other side, but just like so many of our family members, friends and acquaintances have done in the past, it will happen eventually. I can think of nothing more wonderful and worrisome than meeting our Heavenly Father, and Savior, so I hope we're ready for that amazing moment!

I think one of the most important ways to be prepared is by having a clear conscience in regard to our family relationships. We must never let a day go by without saying, "I love you!" to each other. We don't need to throw out a continuous barrage of "I love you...I love you...I love you!" all day long (reminiscent of Don Lockwood fake professing his love to Lina Lamont in Singin' in the Rain—one of my favorite movies ever!), for that would become tedious and the recipient might doubt our sincerity! Yet it is very possible through our actions, words, and deeds, to show our dear family members every day just how much they mean to us...how special they are to us!

Of course I understand that not every family relationship is a perfectly beautiful walk around Secret Lake, but it is possible and essential to never let our family members wonder of our love for them. :)

I loved finding these cute flowers to represent the "He/she loves me; she/he loves me not" idea. :)

Similarly, if we have family relationships that aren't so rosy, it's vital for us to find a way to put the past behind us, make amends, and move on. Forgiveness is a must in every family relationship! I know sometimes it might be hard to want to forgive our family members, yet that's when we need to pray for help—like we are going to meet our maker tomorrow. We must pray to have the desire to forgive those who have hurt us. I'm not implying we should ever allow ourselves to be put in harm's way, but I am saying we need to completely forgive, while simultaneously staying safe.

Once we have made every family relationship right, it's time to work on our other friendships or acquaintance relationships. When the time comes and we find ourselves in heaven, we should be ready to meet anyone we know—without a cloud of disappointment or regret overshadowing our reunions.

When those heavenly meet and greets come for me, I dearly want to have a crystal clear conscience. I know I won't ever be perfect here in this earth life, but I never want to bump into someone in heaven whom I haven't forgiven here on Earth. Obviously it's up to them if they choose to forgive me, but I'll at least try to ask for their forgiveness. That said, I know I have some work to do...it might take me a while to get there, but please know that I'll be actively working on my forgiveness skillz! :)

I'm filled with gratitude in the fact that my relationships with my departed family members were in excellent standing before their dear souls were taken home to heaven. Even though I miss them terribly, I have such peace knowing we're all good!

Even though I try really hard to consciously live my life in the moment, every moment, days like today help me re-internalize just how temporary and priceless our lives are! We'll never know how much time we have to enjoy with those most important souls we adore. I hope each and every one of us makes the very best use of each invaluable moment we are given!

P.S. Off to P90X I go—it's KenpoX day! *Because of our sweet Aunt Carol's sudden tragedy, I've decided I will never, ever, stop exercising until the day I die. Of course I won't exercise completely continuously—for that would be unhealthy for me to never rest, but I will definitely exercise enough that my body remains as healthy and strong for as long as possible! P90X Foreva'! Ha ha.

The Atonement of Jesus Christ

Today I taught a lesson in my Mia Maid class about the Atonement of Jesus Christ titled, "What is the Atonement of Jesus Christ?" I thoroughly enjoyed preparing for my lesson by reading and listening to scriptures about the Savior's last days in mortality. (See Matthew 26-27.) I also loved reading various Church talks and articles, and watching many Bible Videos—I have come to deeply appreciate them!

(If you've never seen my church's Bible Videos, I highly recommend checking them out, for they are very well done—their dialogue follows the Bible's verses almost exactly! The videos are available for free online and via iOS and Android apps. I love free, don't you?! :) They're also available on YouTube, but I prefer the Church's backgrounds, for they are much less distracting than the endless video suggestions on YouTube.)

We all know the Atonement of Jesus Christ has been talked about for centuries. I've had so many lessons on the topic, I literally can't remember the number! Yet, I don't think we can ever talk about the Atonement enough. In True to the Faith, the first paragraph about the Atonement of Jesus Christ states,

"The word atone means to reconcile, or to restore to harmony. Through the Atonement of Jesus Christ, we can be reconciled to our Heavenly Father (see Romans 5:10-11; 2 Nephi 25:23; Jacob 4:11). We can ultimately dwell in His presence forever, having been 'made perfect through Jesus' (see D&C 76:62, 69)."

Will there ever be a time in the history of our world when the Atonement isn't applicable? No, there is not. The Living Christ points out, "None other has had so profound an influence upon all who have lived and will yet live upon the earth." Later, The Living Christ continues, "I am the first and the last; I am he who liveth, I am he who was slain; I am your advocate with the Father." (D&C 110:3-4) Furthermore, former Church President, Gordon B. Hinkley stated,

"[Jesus Christ] is the chief cornerstone of the church that bears His name, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. There is no other name given among men whereby we can be saved (see Acts 4:12). He is the author of our salvation, the Giver of eternal life (see Hebrews 5:9). There is none equal Him. There never has been. There never will be. Thanks be to God for the gift of His Beloved Son, who gave His life that we might live and who is the chief, immovable cornerstone of our faith and His Church. 

"We know not all that lies ahead of us. We live in a world of uncertainty. For some, there will be great accomplishment. For others, disappointment. For some, much of rejoicing and gladness, good health, and gracious living. for others, perhaps sickness and a measure of sorrow. We do not know. But one thing we do know. Like the Polar Star in the heavens, regardless of what the future holds, there stands the Redeemer of the world, the Son of God, certain and sure as the anchor of our immortal lives. He is the rock of our salvation, our strength, our comfort, the very focus of our faith. 

"In Sunshine and in shadow, we look to Him, and He is there to assure and smile upon us." – Gordon B. Hinckley, We Testify of Jesus Christ, jesuschrist.lds.org

Isn't that quote so beautiful? President Hinckley was such a great wordsmith. I can't adequately explain the fondness and appreciation that fills my soul when I read or hear his words. I attribute President Hinckley's wonderful ability with words to the fact that (I think) he spoke directly from his soul to everyone else's soul! What a marvelous gift his words are to generations of people! :)

Three of the many principles/points I tried to convey to my Mia Maid class were taken from Sister Linda K. Burton's Relief Society talk, "Is Faith in the Atonement of Jesus Christ Written in Our Hearts?", General Conference, October, 2012:

1. "All that is unfair about life can be made right through the Atonement of Jesus Christ." [This point was taken from Preach My Gospel: A Guide to Missionary Service (2004), 52.]
2. There is power in the Atonement to enable us to overcome the natural man or woman and become true disciples of Jesus Christ. [This point was taken from David A. Bednar's talk, "The Atonement and the Journey of Mortality," Ensign, April, 2012, 40-47.]
3. The Atonement is the greatest evidence we have of the Father's love for His children. [See Dallin H. Oaks, Liahona and Ensign, Nov. 2009, 26.]

It's just so true: there is truly nothing in, on, or around this earth that shows God's love for us better than the Atonement. Because of our Savior, we can be forgiven of our sins and gain access back into our Heavenly Father's presence!

Speaking of our Savior, I was thrilled to find out that the entire musical production of Savior of the World is available for free to the stakes/wards/members of the Church to participate in and present as a church activity! Wow. I remember seeing the original production in the Conference Center many years ago—it was marvelous and I felt the Spirit so strongly. I remember crying a little bit as I watched certain parts of the musical. It was so very well done. I wish my stake—with its supremely talented members—would do a production of Savior of the World! I would totally participate in it! :)

During my lesson, I showed the stunning painting Peter's Denial, by Carl Heinrich Bloch. I wanted my Mia Maids to see Peter hiding out on the porch, and Jesus looking at him. Can you even imagine what was going through our Savior's mind?! I think there were probably no words. Even though Jesus was the Son of God, He still had human feelings. I imagine His sadness at Peter's denial must have been profound. They both must have been so disappointed by Peter's actions! :(

I then read Matthew 26:33-34 to them:

"33 Peter answered and said unto him, Though all men shall be offended because of thee, yet will I never be offended.
 34 Jesus said unto him, Verily I say unto thee, That this night, before the cock crow, thou shalt deny me thrice.
 35 Peter said unto him, Though I should die with thee, yet will I not deny thee. Likewise also said all the disciples."

I continued in Matthew 26:69-74:

"69 ¶Now Peter sat without in the palace: and a damsel came unto him, saying, Thou also wast with Jesus of Galilee.
 70 But he denied before them all, saying, I know not what thou sayest.
 71 And when he was gone out into the porch, another maid saw him, and said unto them that were there, This fellow was also with Jesus of Nazareth.
 72 And again he denied with an oath, I do not know the man.
 73 And after a while came unto him they that stood by, and said to Peter, Surely thou also art one of them; for thy speech bewrayeth thee. [i.e., reveals you]
 74 Then began he to curse and to swear, saying, I know not the man. And immediately the cock crew."

I tried to convey to my Mia Maids the great importance of never denying our Savior or Heavenly Father. I then quoted a portion from the Young Women Theme, "WE WILL 'STAND as witnesses of God at all times and in all things, and in all places.'" Each Sunday, every Young Women group within the Church stands together and says the YW theme, but I wanted to give my Mia Maids another example of what standing as a witness really means. I hope they have the desire to not be like Peter—at least in this situation. But I also pointed out that even after all that Peter did, he was forgiven because of the supreme gift of the Atonement. :)

Because I ran out of lesson time today, one point I didn't get to make is found in D&C 20:22, "He suffered temptations but gave no heed unto them." I'm certain there were endless temptations our Savior could have accepted in His life, yet He chose time and again to ignore every single one of them. And when He could have removed himself from the crucifixion, He chose to bless all of our lives instead. What a fabulous example He is to us! Yes, I have much to work on in my life. :)

Thankfully, I remembered to ask the question, "What can we learn from the Savior's final words he spoke while on the cross, 'Father, forgive them for they know not what they do.' (Luke 23:34)?" I'm so happy my Mia Maids really understand the importance of following the Savior in forgiving everyone—even down to the smallest, most mundane instances in our lives. Granted, I clarified that none of us are perfect. We don't react 100% in the correct way each and every time something bad, sad, annoying, frustrating or catastrophic happens in our lives. That said, my Mia Maids are such strong souls! I have no doubt that if they choose to, they could perfectly follow our Savior's example of forgiveness!

I created this typographic design of John 17:3-4 as my handout for today's lesson. I chose the colors based on what the Savior was wearing in several of the Bible Videos: For God So Loved the World; The Parable of the Talents; Render unto Caesar and unto God.

"3 And this is life eternal, that they might know thee the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom thou hast sent.
4 I have glorified thee on the earth: I have finished the work which thou gavest me to do."

Don't you love Jesus' words?! He clearly and honestly stated that he did everything our Heavenly Father wanted and needed Him to do. What an exceptional example He is for us to follow. If we pray daily to know and do what Heavenly Father desires of us in every circumstance, we will be unstoppable!

I couldn't help but include these wonderful scriptures, for they are exactly what I'm trying to do in my life. 2 Nephi 25:23,26 (emphasis added):

"23 For we labor diligently to write, to persuade our children, and also our brethren, to believe in Christ, and to be reconciled to God; for we know that it is by grace that we are saved, after all we can do.
26 And we talk of Christ, we rejoice in Christ, we preach of Christ, we prophesy of Christ, and we write according to our prophecies, that our children may know to what source they may look for a remission of their sins."

Do I do all of that ^ perfectly? Nope, I don't. Yet I try my best every day. I repent when I mess up—which happens a lot, but I just keep swimming in the right direction! Don't you just love that movie?! Finding Nemo, that is. ;)

Anywho, I'm grateful I've been able to study the Atonement of Jesus Christ throughout my life. Knowing what I know makes me happy! I feel like I have a pretty good understanding of the Atonement—even though I know my human mind can't possibly comprehend all of it. But hey, that's why we're all here on earth: to keep learning, growing and becoming the people our Heavenly Father knows we can be. I have peace knowing this great plan of happiness (i.e., the plan of salvation) is made possible by our sweet, unselfish, perfect Savior. :)

The Day I Stopped Following Matt Walsh

I have enjoyed reading Matt Walsh's blog for nearly a year now. He's made me laugh and nod my head in agreement many, many times. But today, I stopped following Matt Walsh. I deleted him from my Google+, Blogger Dashboard, and Facebook accounts.

Why, you ask, did I stop following Matt Walsh? Why would I stop following someone that I agree with 70% of the time? (Give or take 10% points.) Well, it's because he wrote a post that I absolutely cannot get behind. He's written posts before that I don't agree with, but I just let them go. Not today.

Today, Mr. Walsh posted about Robin Williams' suicide. I knew what Mr. Walsh's title was before I read the post, but I decided to give him the benefit of the doubt and read every word he had to say. Yet at the end of his post, I was done.

You see, Mr. Walsh, we must not judge another person's soul when they commit suicide. We cannot possibly know or understand where a person was in their mind when they took their life. There is no way to ever comprehend what truly happens when a soul commits suicide, until we make it to heaven ourselves and can have a conversation with them. To judge someone so quickly, so harshly, so finally, is reprehensible.

I highly recommend this article about suicide, Suicide: Some Things We Know, and Some We Do Not, by Elder M. Russell Ballard. He's a member of the Quorum of Twelve Apostles in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.

Here are some of my favorite sections from his article:

"The late Elder Bruce R. McConkie, formerly of the Quorum of the Twelve, expressed what many Church leaders have taught: 'Suicide consists in the voluntary and intentional taking of one’s own life, particularly where the person involved is accountable and has a sound mind. … Persons subject to great stresses may lose control of themselves and become mentally clouded to the point that they are no longer accountable for their acts. Such are not to be condemned for taking their own lives. It should also be remembered that judgment is the Lord’s; he knows the thoughts, intents, and abilities of men; and he in his infinite wisdom will make all things right in due course.' (Mormon Doctrine, Salt Lake City: Bookcraft, 1966, p. 771; some italics added.)"

"I feel that judgment for sin is not always as cut-and-dried as some of us seem to think. The Lord said, 'Thou shalt not kill.' Does that mean that every person who kills will be condemned, no matter the circumstances? Civil law recognizes that there are gradations in this matter—from accidental manslaughter to self-defense to first-degree murder. I feel that the Lord also recognizes differences in intent and circumstances: Was the person who took his life mentally ill? Was he or she so deeply depressed as to be unbalanced or otherwise emotionally disturbed? Was the suicide a tragic, pitiful call for help that went unheeded too long or progressed faster than the victim intended? Did he or she somehow not understand the seriousness of the act? Was he or she suffering from a chemical imbalance that led to despair and a loss of self-control? 

"Obviously, we do not know the full circumstances surrounding every suicide. Only the Lord knows all the details, and he it is who will judge our actions here on earth. 

"When he does judge us, I feel he will take all things into consideration: our genetic and chemical makeup, our mental state, our intellectual capacity, the teachings we have received, the traditions of our fathers, our health, and so forth.

"We learn in the scriptures that the blood of Christ will atone for the sins of men 'who have died not knowing the will of God concerning them, or who have ignorantly sinned.' (Mosiah 3:11.)"

"Thankfully, the Prophet Joseph Smith taught this enlightening doctrine: 

"'While one portion of the human race is judging and condemning the other without mercy, the Great Parent of the universe looks upon the whole of the human family with a fatherly care and paternal regard. … He is a wise Lawgiver, and will judge all men, not according to the narrow, contracted notions of men, but, "according to the deeds done in the body whether they be good or evil," or whether these deeds were done in England, America, Spain, Turkey, or India. … We need not doubt the wisdom and intelligence of the Great Jehovah; He will award judgment or mercy to all nations according to their several deserts, their means of obtaining intelligence, the laws by which they are governed, the facilities afforded them of obtaining correct information, and His inscrutable designs in relation to the human family; and when the designs of God shall be made manifest, and the curtain of futurity be withdrawn, we shall all of us eventually have to confess that the Judge of all the earth has done right.' (Teachings of the Prophet Joseph Smith, ed. Joseph Fielding Smith, Salt Lake City: Deseret Book Co., 1938, p. 218.) 

"I draw an important conclusion from the words of the Prophet: Suicide is a sin—a very grievous one, yet the Lord will not judge the person who commits that sin strictly by the act itself. The Lord will look at that person’s circumstances and the degree of his accountability at the time of the act. Of course, this gives us no reason to excuse ourselves in committing sins, nor will the Lord excuse us, if I understand correctly. We must constantly strive to do our best in emulating the Savior in every aspect of our lives. At the same time, however, let us remember that spiritual growth comes 'line upon line,' that the key—in the spirit world as well as in mortality—is to keep progressing along the right path."

No, family/friends/acquaintances/strangers, we must certainly not judge what someone else is going through! Now that I've expressed my frustrations, I'm going to follow my own advice and not judge what Mr. Walsh wrote, for he is entitled to his opinion. But that doesn't mean I need to agree with him, or continue supporting his blog.

In the end, I will continue following our Savior, for Jesus Christ is the only one who knows and understands all of us. It's truly because of Him that we can be restored to our heavenly home, and live with our loved ones for eternity!